The Claudio Ranieri Paradox is not something psychologists talk about but they probably should. It is a state of affairs whereby someone is so nice that they actually provoke nastiness. The Mill has felt the need to study the phenomenon and found that there are several hues to it, with some people apt to be mean to Ranieri for one or more of the following reasons:
• Jealousy: people driven by this motive might be heard to mutter: “I wish I was as nice and popular as him, the bastard.”
• Suspicion: “Look at him, wafting in here all smiles and handshakes: he’s got to be hiding something. And check the boot of his car.”
• Easiness: “I am angry and want to hurt someone. I know, I’ll pick on someone nice because they’re less likely to hurt me back!”
• Thoroughness: “He ‘seems’ nice but how can we be sure that he really is? Better trip him up to see how he reacts.”
• Acquisitiveness: “To be as nice as Ranieri we must take the thing that makes him so happy and nice. We must take Riyad Mahrez.”
• It’s hard to say for sure which of the above forces is driving Barcelona but there are reports today that the Catalan club are eyeing up Mahrez. Will Ranieri’s niceness hold up? Should Leicester consider re-hiring Nigel Pearson as a bouncer?
Questions, questions, and not just at Leicester. At Arsenal, for instance, Arsène Wenger is reportedly running the rule over his entire squad to decide who should be offered new contracts: Mesut Özil and Nacho Monreal are top of the list, apparently. According to reports, Robert Lewandowski would have been on that list if a “discreet summer enquiry” made by Arsenal had borne fruit. But it didn’t, which is just as well really, otherwise Arsenal may never have got around to activating the Mathieu Flamini goal machine.
Chelsea are plotting a bumper spending spree in January, with Dani Alves set to be parachuted in to relieve the suddenly-suffering Branislav Ivanovic. José Mourinho also wants to return to Porto to nab the hot teenage attacker Rúben Neves before Barcelona or Real Madrid get their clutches on him. On Neves that is, as they’ve already had their clutches on Mourinho and seem to have felt sullied by the experience.
Finally, Marcos Rojo is happy at Manchester United. Yes, someone actually reported that.
