With Lord Ashcroft trying to hog the rumour-mongering, the Mill needs to raise its game. But the unenlightened football world appears to be lagging behind the upper classes when it comes to allegations of dead animal sex attacks so we’re out of our league on that score. We did think we were overhearing a conversation last night about what Brendan Rodgers does with his private parts but it turned out to be just a couple of Liverpool fans saying the manager doesn’t know his arse from his elbow.
That is an increasingly popular opinion, of course, and Calciomercato claims today that members of Liverpool’s top brass are starting to share it to the point that they are sounding out at least one replacement, namely Carlo Ancelotti. Now there’s a man who knows what it’s like to be pig-sick.
Ancelotti, of course, was on the wrong end of the miracle of Istanbul, when a clueless Liverpool seemed dead certs for humiliation but were saved by a sensational transformation that left a disgusted Ancelotti bemoaning “six minutes of madness”. Now, after many months of apparent madness at Anfield, the former Milan manager could be given the chance to inspire a similar turnaround and give a strange circularity to his own career as a gaffer.
High jinks continue at another of Ancelotti’s former clubs, Chelsea. With furious media leaders demanding to know why the hell the intrigue involving the club and Dr Eva Carneiro has not yet been given a title ending with “gate”, José Mourinho continues to pursue new players. Word is Chelsea are lining up a deal for Nicolas Nkoulou, the Marseille centre-back who is not of the same quality as John Stones or Marquinhos but who offers the comparative advantage of being cheap, since his contract at the Vélodrome expires next summer.
Chelsea also want to bolster their midfield by luring Blaise Matuidi, whom one outlet describes today as “a replacement for Mikel John Obi”, which is a bit like calling the North American X-15 a substitute for a hang glider.
Still in France, Chelsea are also plotting a bid for Alexandre Lacazette, the striker whose lack of sharpness this season suggests he could fit right in at Stamford Bridge. Naturally, Liverpool are looking at him too.
The Juventus defender Daniele Rugani may be behind Giorgio Chiellini and Leonardo Bonucci in his club’s pecking order but that still does not mean that the Old Lady will listen to offers from Arsène Wenger for the 21-year-old. Which may actually please Arsenal, a club that seem to specialise in making offers that can be refused.
Remember Ravel Morrison? Queens Park Rangers do, and they want to bring the now-22-year-old back from Lazio in January.
Internazionale are so pleased with Gary Medel that they want to tie him to a new contract lest clubs such as West Ham come courting the Chilean again.
Tony Pulis has yet to decide whether he wants to keep Ricardo Vaz Tê, who has been on trial at West Brom since last week.
The Leeds United owner, Massimo Cellino, is “deeply offended” that Sam Byram has turned down a new contract offer from the club. But tomorrow he may be delighted about it, and on Thursday he may be confused, and the next day he may be angry and despondent. It’s hard to keep up .
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