Football: Avram Grant

Avram's come up with a novel way of motivating Michael Ballack, according to Christopher Pavezka. Photograph: /x

"Meanwhile, Scooby and Shaggy are investigating the mysterious 'David Cameron is Frank Lampard' case," says Ross Snell, stuffing his mouth with Scooby snacks. "Has anyone seen them together in the same room before?" Photograph: /x

Avram shows Andriy his tender side in Connor O'Neill's effort. Photograph: /x

Joseph Duca has given Avram a (driving) licence to thrill. Photograph: /x

"No matter how strong he looked, no one loved The Thing," says Roy Ward sadly. "All they ever did was bang on about Jose Fantastic." Photograph: /x

"Talk to the monkey because the ears ain't listening," chuckles Ben Lang. Photograph: Ben Lang/guardian.co.uk

"Avram reveals his secret desire for beautiful football," giggles Dom Bartolo. Photograph: /x

"Yet another saviour to come out of the Middle East, and one sure to enforce the Lord's commandments," thunders Juergen Schnell. Photograph: /x

"And everyone thought it was going to be a flop," sighs Michael McGrath. Photograph: /x

John Barry has been flicking through his Mel Brooks back catalogue too. Photograph: /x

Here's Ian Shine: "Marlon Brando is not dead, but researching a new role as a fat football coach." Photograph: /x

"Since the death of Jim Henson, Kermit the Grant needs a new mentor," cackles John Leonard. Photograph: /x

"Roman continues to stand by his man in pursuit of attractive football," cackles Ryan Coutant. Photograph: /x

"Dr Roman unveils his latest creation that will help him win the Champions League," says Michael Doyle. Photograph: Michael Doyle/guardian.co.uk

Neil Manley's effort is fairly self-explanatory. Photograph: /x

"I have come to the conclusion that Avram Grant is really chief inspector Charles Dreyfuss, the character played by Herbert Lom from the Pink Panther films," says John Dickerson. Fair enough. Photograph: /x

Ben Bennett comes out punning. Photograph: /x

Mike Snell reckons Borat and Avram have got plenty in common. Like the third and fourth letters of their name. Photograph: /x