Former NBA star Jayson Williams still has rebounding on his mind.
More than two decades removed from NBA glory _ having since served 18 months in prison for the death of livery driver Costas "Gus" Christofi and his attempt to cover up the killing _ Williams tells the Daily News he dreams of coming back to the life that should have been.
Next Friday, he commemorates four years of sobriety.
"I'd love to sit here and tell you that every once in a while when I have 20 to 30 minutes off in the day I don't start thinking about getting another chance on TV or radio," Williams, 51, said from Futures Recovery Healthcare outside Palm Beach, Fla., where he launched the Rebound at Futures Recovery program last summer.
"Then it hits me in the stomach, that because of all the pain I caused so many people, I just go back to work," he said. "I still dream about getting back on television... doing something on radio. That's a passion. I love it."
The 6-foot-10 former power forward made a name for himself by crashing the boards at Christ the King High School in New York's Queens, then St. John's University before moving onto the Philadelphia 76ers for two years and the New Jersey Nets for another seven.
The basketball world was yanked away from the charismatic big man when he broke his leg in an on-court collision with Stephon Marbury during a game on April Fool's Day 1999.
Less than three years after that injury, Williams' whole life came crashing down when reckless gunplay in his New Jersey mansion left his 55-year-old driver dead.
Christofi was fatally shot on Feb. 14, 2002, after he drove Williams and several friends back to the basketball star's Alexandria Township home following an event. Inside the house, Williams removed a shotgun from a case, and it discharged as he was waving it around.
After Christofi's death, Williams said things got worse as he hit the bottle hard and relied on sleeping pills to get him through the night. Williams then tried to get back to the life he knew, but that society would no longer have him.
"This thing (was) eating me and no one would have me back," he said. "I couldn't do the things I loved doing, going on radio shows and TV shows, it was all negativity."
He's come to accept that his lot in life is helping other people take back their lives from substance abuse. In turn, Williams says the people he keeps sober do the same for him.
"I'm not here to try to win everyone back anymore," Williams said. "I have done everything a man is supposed to do and things a man isn't supposed to do in his life and most of the things I'm embarrassed and ashamed about. I'm not trying to impress anyone. I'm just comfortable with what I'm doing now."
Williams said that when his pal Chris Mullin left his head coaching job at St. John's in April he was contacted about returning to his alma mater for a senior-level position with the team, but wasn't ready to leave the work he's doing in Florida.
A lot has changed since Williams left the New York area, including the city where his former team plays. He's up for reconnecting with the Nets in their new Brooklyn home, if they're interested.
"If they were in Timbuktu, I'd love the Nets and be loyal to them," he said. "They have moved on from me. I have never moved on from them."
