Every year, when I head home for the holidays, a Christmas miracle happens. The space-time continuum collapses and I find myself regressing 20 years; transforming from a semi-well-adjusted adult into a terrible teenager. I squabble with my sister. I forget how to do basic tasks and I expect my mum to do all my laundry and bring me cups of tea. I refuse to get out of bed before I am mentally ready, which is never before 10am.
Please don’t judge. You know what I’m talking about. Holiday regression is a widespread phenomenon. Freud even had theories about it, which, no doubt, he came up with after locking himself in his childhood room because he had got into a heated argument about the correct way to make a Yorkshire pudding. According to Freud, regression is a way of dealing with stress; you snap back into familiar patterns of behaviour as a coping mechanism. Because, while the holiday season is great, it is certainly not without its stresses.
As a semi-well-adjusted adult, I am determined not to regress this year. So I have been researching how to remain calm and carry on with Christmas, even when you really want to start an argument with your sister. According to one therapist, the secret is stance. Standing up straight and committing to an “adult posture” is, apparently, a good way to remind yourself that you are a sensible grown-up.
I have been practising my adult posture, but I have also been trialling a few other coping mechanisms. And you know what? I have a winner. Headstands. Seriously, next time you feel yourself being drawn into an argument with your family, take a deep breath, and try standing on your head. It will change your whole outlook, I promise.
