Two days out from the election, there are still surprises being thrown our way.
You wouldn’t have picked Bill Shorten for a bulldog man, yet there he is, at home in his activewear with “Matilda and Theodore” on the front page of the Sydney Morning Herald.
In an election campaign, there is no such thing as candid – there are only signifiers. The first public appearance of Shorten’s dogs, especially at this late stage, is meant to communicate something.
It could be that Fairfax photographer Alex Ellinghausen was seeking points of interest for a photo that was otherwise shaping up to be of sweaty Shorten after his morning run. Or it could be something far more significant.
In a campaign where not very much has been analysed every which way – where high-resolution portraits of the foreign affairs minister reacting to stills from Sex and the City has been billed as unprecedented insight – let’s assume the latter and “unpack”.
After all, in 2009, the New York Times described, definitely completely seriously, the selection process for the Obamas’ First Dog as “one of the most closely watched appointments of the new administration”. (The president said, also seriously, that it was “tougher than finding a commerce secretary”.)
Just discovered this excellent photo on https://t.co/RpXA5seGzr and my life is now complete. pic.twitter.com/k3Ag0p900M
— Tim Christodoulou (@tim_chr) May 12, 2016
Matilda and Theodore are British bulldogs: placid, stoic, jowly, less fashionable than the French equivalent, more widespread than the American. It is not known whether their names are abbreviated at the park, but you’d certainly hope so.(Ellinghausen, quite reasonably, did not respond to a request for comment.)
British bulldogs were a fixture of world war one propaganda posters, but their symbolism peaked when Winston Churchill became prime minister. The breed continues to be used to represent determination (particularly British) to overcome powerful adverse forces (particularly Nazi). With the Coalition pulling ahead in the polls, a well-established symbol of tenacity is not a bad card to play.
But the connotations of the British bulldog have been complicated – like everything else – by the vote to leave the European Union, with the Sydney Morning Herald using an obstinate bulldog just on Tuesday to illustrate its article on the “short-term dangers” of Brexit.
Peter Hartcher: Brexit shows the world is in danger of forgetting its history https://t.co/GfhzKyi99s pic.twitter.com/qymnKDDnhU
— smh.com.au (@smh) June 28, 2016
At a time when Great Britain’s place in the world has never been of less sure footing, Shorten would do well to keep focus on Australia’s relative stability – and there’s a breed to communicate just that. Australian bulldogs were developed in the late 2000s in response to the myriad health problems that plague the British variety, to be “more functional ... [and] appropriate to live in Australia’s conditions”.
Already, one Twitter user has made the connection between British bulldogs and the Labor leader:
@theredandblue @Drag0nista The sort of dog a man has says a lot and Shorten has Mutant hounds see @annabelcrabb 's show the other night?
— Iain Hall (@theiainhall) June 30, 2016
Guardian Australia is not advocating that Matilda and Theodore be quietly replaced for the sake of semiotics, but it is a point to bear in mind for next time.
By contrast, Malcolm Turnbull’s JoJo – once a recurring feature of his online presence – has kept an uncharacteristically low profile this campaign, perhaps to mitigate the risk of her being papped with Barnaby Joyce, a caption competition waiting to happen.
JoJo the dog relaxes after day of exhausting patriotism pic.twitter.com/3IdXY0Zw
— Malcolm Turnbull (@TurnbullMalcolm) January 26, 2013
More likely, JoJo is in the dog house for risk of resurrecting her personal blog, still active but unmaintained on the prime minister’s website. JoJo’s last post was in late July 2013, beginning with the time-honoured blog introduction: an apology for the delay since the last post.
“But I have stuff to do ... Anyway, the truth is that just as on the internet nobody knows you are a dog, so too nobody knows you are a human? You may well think this blog is written by Malcolm, or Daisy, or Lucy or it could be Alex ... but how do you know I don’t write some of their material?”
Channelling JoJo was arguably Turnbull’s greatest achievement as communications minister. Whether or not it humanised him is a matter of opinion.
The Spectator wrote, definitely completely seriously, in 2008 that Turnbull had placed JoJo “at the very heart of his political career”, with great success: “Malcolm Turnbull, dog walker ... is a more appealing and accessible figure than Malcolm Turnbull, zillionaire megalomaniac.”
On our walk today JoJo our little dog growls and snarls at another little dog who snarls back. "Worse than politicians." sighs it's owner
— Malcolm Turnbull (@TurnbullMalcolm) June 6, 2014
But someone within Team Turnbull must disagree, because JoJo seems to have been barred from her master’s side this campaign. Turnbull last publicly posted about her in June 2014.
Why is JoJo too hot?
Do the archives of her poorly punctuated and rambling blog contain controversial comments about same-sex marriage and Indigenous constitutional recognition?
Is it because, with her penchant for high art – she was papped at Laurie Anderson’s “Music for Dogs” concert at the Opera House in 2010 – she’s just not relatable enough?
Has she refused to back Turnbull’s “Dogs and Grrrowth” policy, her public appearance risking exposure of further divisions within the Coalition?
Whatever the reason, the prime minister’s outsourced.
#LibRally #DogsForGrowth pic.twitter.com/d2TcGZGxza
— Malcolm Turnbull (@TurnbullMalcolm) June 26, 2016
Indeed, on 23 May, the Australian reported Turnbull “met several dogs”, showing particular fondness for a “Lagotto Romagnolo” called Brando. An Italian breed, they retail for upwards of $1,500. Mr Harbourside Mansion could stand to make a last-ditch appearance at the shelter.
Of course there are cases to be made for keeping dogs off the campaign trail altogether, just one of which is the threat of Miranda Devine reading scepticism into your “insightful” dog’s expression on Four Corners and pointing to it as evidence of your “inner rottenness” in the Daily Telegraph (“Yes, dogs are great judges of character”).
In the lead-up to the 2004 election, the Coalition’s member for Solomon, Dave Tollner, was thought to face a significant challenge to keep his seat – the most marginal in the country, his by just 88 votes.
With a string of public gaffes to his name his chances were further upset when his dog, a bullmastiff named Brussels Sprouts, attacked a neighbour, “taking a large chunk of flesh out of her leg, and causing an embarrassing diversion in his campaign”, as the ABC reported at the time.
Tollner refused to respond to its reporter’s question: “Are you a responsible dog owner?”
He was re-elected with an increased margin.
To quote Sophie Mirabella, accusing the Liberal party of destabilising her campaign last month: “If you want a friend in politics, get a dog.”
