Full time: Everton 5-2 West Brom
Peep peep! Everton go top of the Premier League, at least for the next eight hours, after an ultimately emphatic win over West Brom. The match was settled in a 90-second period just before half-time when James Rodriguez made it 2-1 to Everton and Kieran Gibbs was sent off for shoving James in the face.
Dominic Calvert-Lewin was the star with the first hat-trick of his career, while James again oozed class. It’s been a very, very good seven days for Everton.
90 min Four minutes of added time.
89 min Sigurdsson sprays a beautiful crossfield pass to Digne, who cushions a lovely first-time volley across the area. Richarlison gets in front of his man but can’t make proper contact on his stooping header and the ball drifts wide.
89 min Nothing much is happening. Everton would quite like a sixth goal but they’re not desperate; West Brom just want to get out of town.
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88 min “Six goals for Everton this season,” says Gary Naylor. “Or 13.3% of last season’s 45. Top of the league!”
The 2021-22 Champions League is a done deal.
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87 min “This was me not getting carried away,” says Kári Tulinius. “My first thought was to email asking if you thought Everton were going to win the league.”
84 min Allan’s long pass is cushioned deftly by Sigurdsson into the path of Keane, who shoots over from 20 yards.
82 min West Brom just want this game to end.
79 min “Where are the ‘olés’ on the crowd soundtrack?” asks Gary Naylor.
78 min Moise Kean replaces James, who was again very impressive.
77 min “Hello Rob,” says Kári Tulinius. “As a neutral, the Merseyside derby hasn’t been something I particularly look forward to, but I’m already now looking forward to the 17th October. If it’s not a humdinger of a game, I’ll be surprised.”
Let’s not get too carried away.
76 min: Richarlison has a goal disallowed for offside! It was a spectacular half-volley from Sigurdsson’s cross, but he was just ahead of the last defender when the ball came in.
75 min Another West Brom change: Sam Field replaces Romaine Sawyers.
74 min Iwobi almost gets a pass through to Richarlison in the area. Ajayi does well to intercept.
71 min A double substitution for West Brom: the excellent goalscorers Grady Diangana and Matheus Pereira are replaced by Kyle Edwards and Matt Phillips. And Everton’s hat-trick hero Dominic Calvert-Lewin is replaced by Alex Iwobi.
71 min “Apropos of nothing,” says John Norris, “how about a plug for Warrington Town who are promoting their scarf on the club webshop with a perma-grinning Harry Redknapp, although they make it clear he isn’t included...”
It’s a triffic scarf.
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70 min The scoreline is seriously harsh on West Brom, who have done so many good things in this game.
James’s outswinging corner from the left was slightly behind Calvert-Lewin, who twisted his neck in an attempt to steer a header towards goal. The ball hit the back of his neck, I think, and flew past Johnstone. It was hideous defending from West Brom as well - Calvert-Lewin was completely unmarked eight yards from goal.
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GOAL! Everton 5-2 West Brom (Calvert-Lewin 66)
A hat-trick for Dominic Calvert-Lewin!
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66 min: Digne hits the bar! It was a nice free-kick that took a slight touch off the West Brom wall and clattered off the top of the bar.
65 min Livermore fouls James 22 yards from goal. Before the free-kick is taken, Gylfi Sigurdsson replaces Doucoure.
64 min “If you run into the box James will find you,” says Mary Waltz. “No goal, but what a pass.”
It was pretty erotic.
James flipped a delicious pass over the defence to release Richarlison, who cushioned a slightly awkward left-footed volley past Johnstone. The ball was going just wide, I think, but then Calvert-Lewin slid it over the line from a yard. The pass from James really was beautiful.
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GOAL! Everton 4-2 West Brom (Calvert-Lewin 62)
Everton should be home now.
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59 min I should have said that Dara O’Shea has moved to left-back, so West Brom are now playing a 4-4-1.
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58 min After good play from Diangana and Pereira, Robinson slides a low cross into the six-yard box that is cleared by Digne.
Digne’s free-kick from the left was headed towards goal by Richarlison at the near post. Johnstone made a smart save to his left but Keane reacted first to force the loose ball over the line.
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GOAL! Everton 3-2 West Brom (Keane 54)
Everton take the lead again!
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52 min Whatever happens from here - and you’d still expect Everton to win against 10 men - it’s been such an encouraging afternoon for West Brom. Diangana has been majestic, and Robinson has quietly had a very good game up front.
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50 min Replays show that Mina, in the wall, didn’t jump in an attempt to stop Pereira’s free-kick. Had he done so, it would have smacked him in the coupon and Everton would be 2-1 ahead.
48 min Sheesh, this is great entertainment.
That was a spectacular free-kick from Matheus Pereira. He was 25 yards out, to the right of centre, and curled a beauty into the top corner with his left foot. Pickford had no chance.
GOAL! Everton 2-2 West Brom (Pereira 47)
Ten-man West Brom equalise with another belter!
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46 min Furlong crosses towards Diangana, who is sandwiched by Coleman and Doucoure. There’s a slight appeal for a penalty but Diangana had missed his header before Coleman bumped him.
46 min Peep peep! West Brom begin the second half.
“Hi Rob,” says Neill Brown. “Now Bilic has to watch the second half from an empty stand, is there any protocol that states he can’t just shout his instructions more loudly than usual?”
Haha, that’s a very good point.
“Mike Dean thinks he is the king of the league,” says Mary Waltz. “He could have simply walked away, Bilic was not using foul language, he simply asked for Dean to check the tape again. Dean could have said, ‘I will”, and ended it. But no, Dean’s ‘You must respect my Author..I-TEE’ act took over and he gave him the boot.”
Yes, at first I assumed Bilic was using the language of the docker but it turns out that wasn’t the case.
Half-time reading
Half time: Everton 2-1 West Brom
Slaven Bilic is fuming with Mike Dean - and now Bilic has been sent off! He walked onto the field at half time and started ranting at Dean, who took it for a few seconds and then sent Bilic off. You can understand Bilic’s frustration: West Brom started so well, but now they are a goal and a man down.
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45+2 min James made the most of it, as modern footballers do, but it was an almost bizarre moment of indiscipline from Gibbs.
KIERAN GIBBS IS SENT OFF!
45+1 min What a nightmare for West Brom. James went down after a collision with Gibbs, and Mike Dean whipped out the red card straight away. Replays show why: James nibbled at Gibbs, who took a couple of seconds to decide what to do and then shoved James in the face. A ludicrous business, and a clear red card.
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It was a really nice strike from 20 yards. Richarlison started the move by forcing his way past Ajayi and surging towards the penalty area. He squared the ball to James, who took a little touch to set himself up and drove an immaculate low shot into the far corner. That’s a lovely goal.
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GOAL! Everton 2-1 West Brom (James 45)
James Rodriguez gets his first Everton goal!
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43 min Ajayi concedes another corner, Everton’s 4914th of the half. Digne curls it towards the near post and Pereira heads clear.
41 min “Grady Diangana looks like the player Mark Noble would like to be,” says Gary Naylor. “I wonder if his Twitter finger is twitching.”
38 min Everton are playing much better now, though West Brom still look menacing on the break.
34 min The dangerous Diangana slides a nice pass into the area to Pereira, who tries to clip the ball across the face of goal. Pickford flies from his line to make a good block.
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33 min It was a deft finish from Calvert-Lewin, who reacted smartly to jump and backheel the ball past Johnstone.
GOAL! Everton 1-1 West Brom (Calvert-Lewin 33)
The goal stands!
32 min Coleman lofted a cross towards Richarlison, who challenged for it with Furlong at the far post. The ball hit Furlong and bounced towards Calvert-Lewin, who backheeled the bouncing ball over the line from a couple of yards. He was in an offside position, which is why the flag went up, but replays show Richarlison didn’t touch the ball so I think this will be a goal.
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31 min: Calvert-Lewin has a goal disallowed for offside! This will be checked, because the touch through to him may have been off a West Brom defender.
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30 min This is a good spell for Everton, and Digne’s outswinging corner is headed over by the leaping Keane. He couldn’t quite get over the ball.
28 min A long throw is helped on by Keane to Richarlison, whose snap volley deflects behind for yet another corner.
27 min After some nice footwork from James, Coleman’s cross is put behind for another corner. Bartley heads it away again.
26 min Richarlison plays a smart one-two with Andre Gomes but slices wide of the near post with his left foot. It was only a half chance.
24 min Everton look flustered and impatient, which is a surprise after such a composed performance at Spurs.
22 min: Livermore hits the post! West Brom could be 2-0 ahead. Furlong’s lofted cross from the right skimmed the head of Robinson and dropped to Livermore just behind him. In one smooth movement he controlled the ball, swivelled and slammed it off the post. Pickford was well beaten.
21 min Coleman wins another corner for Everton. James’s inswinger is headed away by Bartley.
20 min The fake fans are getting restless.
18 min At the other end, Robinson’s long-range shot is pushed away by the diving Pickford. That was a tougher save than Johnstone’s, though still essentially comfortable. West Brom have a peedie spring in their step.
17 min Allan’s long-range shot is comfortably held by Johnstone.
16 min Doucoure is booked for pulling back Diangana, who had beaten him with an extravagant scorpion flick.
15 min Digne’s cutback is intercepted by Saywers, who then plays a ludicrous pass inside his own six-yard box. It’s nicked by Calvert-Lewin, whose shot on the turn deflects wide.
14 min “A fine example of why Everton is looking for a centre-back,” says Mary Waltz.
12 min The BT Sport commentary team think Pickford might have done better on the goal. I’d like to see it again - his positioning might have been iffy.
11 min Richarlison almost equalises straight away. Digne’s free-kick leads to a big a scramble in the West Brom area, and Richarlison’s snapshot from six yards is crucially blocked by Livermore.
Diangana picked the ball up 70 yards from goal and started to surge into space. Everton’s defenders kept backpedalling until Diangana reached the edge of the D and crashed a left-footed drive into the far corner. Carlo Ancelotti spreads his hands wide at his defence, as if to say, ‘Why the eff did none of you effers tackle him?’ It was poor defending from Mina in particular, but a cracking strike.
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GOAL! Everton 0-1 West Brom (Diangana 10)
Grady Diangana gives West Brom the lead with a terrific goal!
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7 min Diangana’s cross is deflected towards Livermore in the D. He hoofs it over the bar. It’s been quite a bright start from both teams though.
3 min: Great chance for Calvert-Lewin! Everton should be ahead. James’s wicked inswinging corner from the right reached Calvert-Lewin, who got away from Furlong at the far post but planted a header just wide from six yards.
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22 seconds: Pickford saves from Diangana! The half-chance came from Pickford’s own lazy pass. It was picked up by Robinson and fed back to Diangana, whose clean low strike was held to his left by Pickford.
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1 min Peep peep! Everton, in blue, kick off from right to left. West Brom are in yellow and green.
It’s a really pleasant autumn day at Goodison Park. The West Brom players have arrived from their temporary dressing-room in the car park; the Everton team are already out on the field.
“Two wins to start Everton’s season, Rob?” says Gary Naylor. “Some of us might prefer two defeats.”
Heh, very good. They still don’t get enough credit for their dominance that season, particularly after Christmas: they had a run 16 wins and two draws in 18 games. It was 21st-century consistency in the mid-1980s.
Team news
Both teams are unchanged from their league matches last weekend.
Everton (4-1-4-1) Pickford; Coleman, Mina, Keane, Digne; Allan; James, Doucoure, Andre Gomes, Richarlison; Calvert-Lewin.
Substitutes: Joao Virginia, Kenny, Sigurdsson, Iwobi, Davies, Bernard, Kean.
West Brom (3-4-2-1) Johnstone; Ajayi, Bartley, O’Shea; Furlong, Livermore, Sawyers, Gibbs; Pereira, Diangana; Robinson.
Substitutes: Button, Kipre, Phillips, Harper, Field, Robson-Kanu, Edwards.
Referee Mike Dean.
Pre-match reading
Preamble
Hello. It’s been eight years since Everton won the first two league games of the season. Baby steps and all that, but this is a good chance to build on their impressive 1-0 win at Spurs on Sunday. Everton looked organised and purposeful, with a sprinkling of fantasy from James Rodriguez. A few folk have been getting carried away, human nature being what it is, but Carlo Ancelotti will know that the Spurs game was literally only a thirty-eighth of the league season.
On paper, this is the perfect follow-up fixture. West Brom struggled against Leicester and were eventually well beaten. They have a tough start to the season - Chelsea are up next - but will be desperate to get some points on the board as soon as possible.
Kick off 12.30pm.
