Did you know that just two weeks ago, we had National Etiquette Week? (Don't worry _ I didn't either. Someone told me about it, so I just looked it up myself.) While a bit late, I contend that every week, and day, should be filled with kindness and etiquette, especially when it has to do with dating. So, for those reasons, I'd like to share the 13 things NOT to do on a first date, in order to make the best impression you can ... and just be a good person.
1. Having your phone out or texting
Nothing screams "I'm waiting for something better to come up" than a cell phone on the table waiting to be answered. Try (as hard as it may be) to put your phone in your bag or your pocket for the entirety of the date. As an additional measure, when your date gets up to use the restroom, try not to immediately take out your phone. If you're on it when your date gets back, he or she assumes you're looking for your next set of plans.
2. Talking about your ex
If you say nice things about your ex, it looks like you're still not over him or her. And if you say negative things, it looks like you're still not over him or her ... and you're bitter. Lose, lose. Plus, people don't want to feel like they are being compared to someone else on the first date (or ever, for that matter).
3. Being late with no notice
Even if you're going to just be five minutes late, the courteous thing to do is to notify your date before the time the date starts.
4. Being excessively late
Again, be respectful of other people's time. Your time is no more valuable than anyone else's.
5. Being rude to a server... or anyone
No snapping your fingers, no yelling for the waiter or waitress, and no treating the servers like second-class citizens. Red flag!
6. Drinking too much
Don't do or you'll regret later. No need to keep up with your date's drinking habits either.
7. Too much talk about work
It's certainly okay to discuss work, but not for the entire date, especially if you don't like your job. You don't want this to turn into a business meeting.
8. Bad hygiene
Make sure your teeth are brushed, your clothes are ironed, and you're otherwise at your best to meet someone new.
9. Marriage talk (either your future one or what went wrong in your last one)
Along with talking about your ex, this never bodes well. If you're both divorced, then please don't share sob stories. It affects the whole tone of the date, and not for the better. And if you like each other, that's great! But save the future planning for the, you know, future.
10. Not tipping well
Unless the service is terrible, then please tip well. It sets a tone.
11. Talking about yourself too much
The date needs to be a give and take ... not a monologue of how great you are. Make sure you're both asking questions and sharing about yourself.
12. Being "fake"
Someone needs to like you for who you are, so you might as well show it off early!
13. Flipping the "off" switch if no attraction
Sometimes we just know that there's no chemistry within the first few minutes. I always encourage you to stay for the duration of the date. And not just in body but in mind too. There is nothing worse than someone trying to talk to you, fully knowing that you've checked out. Be present _ you never know what you might still get out of it!
