Anyway, that’s it from me - thanks all for your company. See you in three weeks!
P.S. Anyone know the super series score? Me neither.
P.P.S. England win 16-12.
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What a night! Pakistan’s youngsters have put on a show for their support, who earned exactly that. They bowled superbly well following the first powerplay, with Sarfraz doing a superb job of rotating his attack. England couldn’t quite work out how to bat, and when they thought they’d worked out how to bowl, Pakistan were ready for them. England trudge off the pitch looking absolutely furious with themselves; Pakistan are overjoyed.
PAKISTAN WIN BY NINE WICKETS WITH 5.1 OVERS TO SPARE!
15th over: Pakistan 130-1 (Latif 57, Babar 8) Target 136 Plunkett is asked to charge in, and Latif adds a single - will Babar try and do it with one hit? He sort of tries, doesn’t fully commit, and they snatch another single, then another; three required. Babar then takes two down to square-leg - the scores are level. Not for long! He power-times a square drive, and Pakistan have won! They have absolutely erased England with a performance not far off perfect!
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14th over: Pakistan 130-1 (Latif 57, Babar 8) Target 136 Bumble would prefer three ODIs and three T20s, which probably makes more sense. Though what I think he’s trying to say is so brilliant have Pakistan been tonight, so brilliant are England oftentimes, so brilliant is the atmosphere, that who doesn’t want more brilliance? Four singles, then Babar cuts four, and only six needed ... surely Latif must...
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13th over: Pakistan 122-1 (Latif 55, Babar 2) Target 136 Moeen’s over starts quietly, so Latif absolutely bases the fifth ball for six over midwicket. Another 50 raises with a six! And he goes again, knucking four more, again through midwicket! Time to go!
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12th over: Pakistan 110-1 (Latif 44, Babar 1) Target 136 “Go out and be brave,” reads the message in the Pakistan dressing room - if we’re judging harshly, I’d suggest they lop off the first three words, which are extraneous. Babar goes hard at his first delivery, misses, and loses his footing - but Buttler can’t snatch the ball to sort a stumping.
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WICKET! Sharjeel Khan c Ali b Rashid 59 (Pakistan 107-1)
Sharjeel goes again, misreading a googly and top-edging an attempted drive over long-on. Moeen, at mid-off, takes the catch in his fingertips.
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11th over: Pakistan 107-0 (Sharjeel 59, Latif 42) Target 136 It’s all gone a little quiet, which Khalid Latif cannot be having, he cannot, no he can’t, so he shmices over midwicket for six! And what a snaffle by a kid in the crowd, who absolutely adores his moment! Great stuff.
Brilliant batting Khalid&Sharjeel. This is Pakistan style, we need this aggressive approach in all T20s & ODI matches. Joy to watch!
— Shahid Afridi (@SAfridiOfficial) September 7, 2016
10th over: Pakistan 100-0 (Sharjeel 58, Latif 36) Target 136 Rashid continues, and this is a good over, just two from it. 10 more, and England will win comfortably; what’s all the fuss about?
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9th over: Pakistan 98-0 (Sharjeel 57, Latif 35) Target 136 On comes Moeen, lucky him. And I wonder if England copied the wrong aspects of Pakistan’s bowling, or at least if they should’ve had a spinner on early. Five from the over, for all the difference that makes.
8th over: Pakistan 93-0 (Sharjeel 54, Latif 33) Target 136 Sharjeel calls for a new bat as Rashid warms up, while Ward and Wasim wonder if it’ll be a heavier one to help get the spin away. Well, whatever it is, it’s working, because Rashid’s second ball, dragged down, is carted over that long leg side boundary that caused England so much aggravation. And there’a another! A full one, right in the slot, and it goes with the spin to square-leg! What a 50 that is, off 30 balls!
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7th over: Pakistan 77-0 (Sharjeel 39, Latif 32) Target 136 So the powerplay is done - can England come back? Stokes is still going, and with the fielders back can keep his lengths back. This is a much tighter over, but then it still yields three which is only just below the rate.
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6th over: Pakistan 74-0 (Sharjeel 37, Latif 32) Target 136 Morgan chucks Root the ball - I’m surprised he’s waited this long to take some pace off, given the havoc already wrought, for all the difference it makes. The batsmen take a single each, then Latif canes one wide of long-on for four, then Latif sweeps one to square-leg for four! The required rate is now 4.42, thanks principally to 14 4s and a 6. Again, this is over!
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5th over: Pakistan 63-0 (Sharjeel 36, Latif 22) Target 136 On comes Stokes, who slows things down - momentarily. Two singles come from his first three balls, and then a thick edge from Sharjeel narrowly avoids the stumps ... and goes for four! This over already! And oh what a shot comes next! A delicious square-cut for four, and what’s notable about it - so too the one he played off Plunkett - is how little room he needs to force it away exceedingly hard. And there he goes again! Six, absolutely mass-murdered over cow corner! Stokes’ first over since he was Brathwaited has gone for 16!
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4th over: Pakistan 47-0 (Sharjeel 21, Latif 21) Target 136 You’ve got to laugh! Hahahahahahaha! Plunkett comes into the attack, starts with a short one because he’s a bit quicker than the other two, and Sharjeel goes for another pull, gets another top edge, gets four more runs! But jeers follow, as the batsmen are uncouth enough to amble a single, soon replaced by cheers when Plunkett hammers down a leg side wide that Buttler can’t feel and four more add to the total. And four more, from a really good shot - Plunkett gives Sharjeel a little width, but he turns it into a lot of width, slamming four through the covers. This is brilliant batting, abject though the bowling has been.
3rd over: Pakistan 32-0 (Sharjeel 16, Latif 16) Target 136 Again, Willey starts ok, but then a half-tracker gets Sharjeel warm and he absolutely dematerialises it over midwicket. There’s something of Sehwag about him, in the way that he doesn’t bother with niceties of foot movement, just trusts his eyes and his wrists. And the crows, already at a peak, go off again when a floaty one is creamed through midwicket. That’s eight boundaries; who can be arsed running in this unseasonable warmth?
2nd over: Pakistan 24-0 (Sharjeel 8, Latif 16) Target 136 Jordan starts with a bouncer and Latif goes with it, swinging over backward square-leg for four. And oh dear, another short one, only this time it’s wide too, so Latif crashes it through point. Then a dot, then a slower ball, and Pakistan know they’ve shown England what to do, so are waiting for them to do it - this shorter one goes to the midwicket fence! And another wide one allows Latif to humding through point, just standing there as it arrives and just standing there as it hurtles to the fence. 16 off the over, four 4s to Latif, what a start for Pakistan!
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1st over: Pakistan 8-0 (Sharjeel 8, Latif 0) Target 136 Swing for Willey, who starts well, with four dots, but then Sharjeel goes to pull one off length, sat back in his crease, and top edges over his head for a one bounce four. And next ball, he waits again, slapping high to the point fence for four, and now it’s Pakistan who’ve started well.
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Willey is windmilling, Morgan is clapping...
Right, off we go again...
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So, worse to bat first and lose wickets chasing a bigger total than is realistic, or worse to field first and spend five overs sussing out the best way to bowl on the particular track? Well, Pakistan are strong favourites, but if England’s spinners bowl well, they’re in the game.
PAKISTAN NEED 136 TO BEAT ENGLAND
20th over: England 135-7 (Ali 13, Plunkett 0) Moeen chucks the bat and carves two to deep cover. The ball plugs away from the fielders, and chasing, Babar slips on the dewey grass and has to be schlepped off by his mates with a twisted ankle. Wahab then hurls down a quicker one, it’s a dot, and a yorker to finish cedes just a single. Brilliantly bowled, Pakistan.
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WICKET! Willey c Shoaib Malik b Wahab Riaz 12 (England 132-7)
Willey goes after another short one, doesn’t catch it, and Shoaib pouches it at mid-off. Tim Robinson thinks he’s detected a no ball, but checks and he has not.
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20th over: England 132-6 (Ali 10, Willey 12) Pakistan have all their men on the leg side out and all their men on the off side in. Wahab opens with a dot, but then Willey finagles two into the leg side - Sarfraz has to chase, due to the aforementioned field placings.
19th over: England 130-6 (Ali 10, Willey 10) This has been a wonderful display of guile, variation and bottle from Pakistan. England are more or less looking for ones and twos now, and that’s all Amir is permitting them. He even clatters Moeen in the sternum with a slower one that’s not picked - another slower one that’s not picked - and the over yields just six.
18th over: England 124-6 (Ali 9, Willey 7) Sohail Tanvir returns, and the batsmen take a single each before Willey waits to clout a cutter over cow corner. That was the kind of delivery that was getting sent earlier in the innings, not into the pitch so sitting up and waiting for treatment. But it’s the only boundary ceded, Sohail’s highlight a beautifully disguised slower ball out the back of the hand.
17th over: England 116-6 (Ali 7, Willey 1) Mohammad Amir returns and after a single and a leg-bye, a bit of late movement through the air deceives Willey, ball clunking pad. There’s an appeal, but it looked like it was going just down - Hawkeye says it was feathering leg stump. England haven’t managed a boundary in the second half of their innings, and don’t especially look like changing that.
16th over: England 110-6 (Ali 3, Willey 0) England are 17-3 from the last three overs.
Morgan c Sarfraz b Wahab 14 (England 110-6)
And it’s an even better one now! Morgan looks to glide one down to third man, gets a toe to it, and Wahab is off without even looking at the umpire. There is very little better than watching him when it’s all going on.
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16th over: England 110-5 (Morgan 14, Ali 3) Wahab is charging in now - his first delivery is almost 92mph. With Pakistan bowling back of a length to force England’s batsmen square of the wicket, where the boundaries are long, might they stand further out of their crease? Anyway, after a leg-bye, Moeen gets two in the covers, then a single, and a wide follows; this is still a decent over.
15th over: England 105-5 (Morgan 14, Ali o) Morgan wallops one into the air and towards the leg side - but it drops safe. Pakistan are absolutely loving this.
WICKET! Stokes c Babar Azam b Hasan Ali 4 (England 104-5)
Stokes goes for this, taking it from outside off towards square-leg. And he properly connects too, but the boundary’s a biggun and off he pops!
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15th over: England 104-4 (Morgan 13, Stokes 4) Oh goody gumdrops, our commentators impart more tales of cricketers on the golf course; verily there is no thrill like it. Anyway, Hasan Ali is rustling through another fine over...
14th over: England 100-4 (Morgan 12, Stokes 1) “There’s a bit of hold in the pitch,” says Alex Hales in commentary, and he reckons 160 or so is a decent score. He also says Imad isn’t looking to spin the ball much, just bowls it straight, which is why you shouldn’t play across the line to him as Hales did. He’s not, apparently, as tricky as Herath, and Rashid and Moeen, who “put more revs on the ball”, should go well on this track. Another quietish over.
WICKET! Buttler c Shoaib Malik b Wahab Riaz 16 (England 93-4)
And there you go! Buttler forces it, making room and swishing - he gets plenty of it, but picks out the fielder at deep point. Apparently, he hit it too well, but on the other hand, Pakistan are rolling!
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13th over: England 93-3 (Buttler 16, Morgan 10) Hasan Ali comes back, having changed ends, and continues those awkward variations of pace - his first four deliveries are 84, 85, 70, 74, brilliant! Buttler tries a scoop at the fifth, misses, and he’s losing the battle at the moment.
“Why have just a single 20-over match,” emails Smylers, “on each against each of England’s visitors this summer, after five 50-over ones — rather than, say, three of each? Wouldn’t it be easier for England to improve at 20:20 cricket if they played a few more matches?”
I don’t know the answer to this one for sure, but I can hazard a guess and it starts with “money” and ends with “money”.
12th over: England 89-3 (Buttler 14, Morgan 8) Into the attack comes Wahab, who sets himself a field that says short stuff. And Buttler can’t get at him after a Morgan single gets him strike, missing two before taking one. Morgan then runs two down to third man and follows in with another single, and England have only taken 36 off the last six overs; well bowled Pakistan.
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11th over: England 84-3 (Buttler 13, Morgan 4) Sarfraz is bowling out Imad, trying to break this partnership, so England bunt him around. He reminds me a little of Kumble in his straightness, but once he’s finished Pakistan only have Shoaib bowling spin - I wonder if they regret leaving out Nawaz. It’s true that the track at OT has some bounce, but only really helps the quickest. Seven off the over, and Imad finishes with 2-17 - what an effort that is.
10th over: England 78-3 (Buttler 9, Morgan 1) England now have two batsmen yet to face a ball, but it doesn’t mither Buttler, who strides down the track and gently leans on one just like that - it’s perfectly timed, and gets him four through cover. And oh my days! I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a batsman quite like Buttler! He gets on his toes to chuck torso, forearms, wrists, hands and fingers through a short one, which gets him another 4.
WICKET! Root c Shoaib Malik b Hasan Ali 6 (England 67-3)
Root leaps to uppercut but there just isn’t enough pace on the ball, given that he’s mid-air when he connects. He gets most of it, but even so, the ball lobs to third man.
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9th over: England 67-2 (Root 6, Buttler 0) This game is tilting...
WICKET! Hales b Imad Wasim 37 (England 67-2)
Imad is so good! His line is so reliable that batsmen can’t afford to miss and can’t really afford to play cross-batted shots, which is what Hales does, heaving across the line. He misses, Imad doesn’t, byeeee.
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9th over: England 67-1 (Hales 37, Root 6) Sarfraz continues with Imad, whom, Nasser reckons, should be played straight. The thing with him is that some turn and some don’t, a tactic or natural variation that got Graeme Swann so many wickets. Swann, I believe, had no idea when the ball would do something and when not, he just ripped it as hard as he could every time.
8th over: England 63-1 (Hales 35, Root 3) Nasser reckons Pakistan have picked the wrong side and that England should always be addressed with spin. Anyway, Hasan Ali begins his international T20 career and we learn that Jason Roy was “shouting and cussing” when he was hutchwards bound. England take three and a leg-bye from the first three balls of the over, then Root goes to play the scoop, realises that it isn’t there, and adjusts to run it down. He is so good - there can’t be many people in the world very much better at anything than he is at batting. Another good over for Pakistan, just six off it.
7th over: England 57-1 (Hales 33, Root 1) Goodness me, Pakistan needed that, though they’ve only brought Joe Root upon themselves - he’s the only batsman in the world to be ranked in the top-five for Tests, ODIs, and T20s. He takes a single off his second ball and that’s really good from Imad, who bowled so well on Sunday - just six runs conceded from his first two overs.
WICKET! Roy lbw b Imad Wasim 21 (England 56-1)
Imad sends down a quicker, fuller one so Roy tried a reverse-sweep, missed, and looked plumb.
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7th over: England 56-0 (Roy 21, Hales 33) Attempting to stem the flow of runs, Sarfraz brings Imad back...
6th over: England 53-0 (Roy 19, Hales 32) Alex Hales is seeing it! After another wide from Sohail, a short one puts on a tail coat and asks to be spanked, so spank it he does, over midwicket for a one-bounce four. And look at this! Next ball, a back foot trigger-move, then a petrifying square-cut fo fo mo! Naturally, in commentary they appear to be discussing Sam Billings’ wealth - which is real nice - and then Roy goes hard at a cross-seamer, looking to hit down the ground but sending an edge spiralling over Sarfraz for another four instead. The powerplay is done, and Pakistan are in trouble.
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5th over: England 39-0 (Roy 15, Hales 23) Hales nudges to short third man and sets off - if Rizwan hits, Roy’s gone - but he misses. And Roy makes him pay, murdering four to long-off next ball, as the racket in the crowd continues. Next, Roy takes a single, then Hales gets two to fine-leg, OT’s longest boundary, before a slower one on his legs gets the treatment - he’s onto it so quickly.
4th over: England 26-0 (Roy 10, Hales 15) Yes, England are underway! Roy, annoyed at missing the first ball of the over takes an almighty swing at the second. It’s almost a golf shot - the bat finishes somewhere about his buttocks, in the process, caning six over wide long-on. Next delivery, he misses with a scoop, and they only manage two singles from what’s left.
3rd over: England 18-0 (Roy 3, Hales 14) Amir comes on the stricken Imad, the plan presumably to hustle through an over of slow stuff while the batsmen settle in. Well, it half worked, because Hales rocks back to Amir’s first ball and lashes a pull through midwicket for four. In the meantime, the ground is still throbbing and pulsating - a lot of people are having a lot of fun - and Hales and Roy take a single each, then Imad trots off for treatment. Two dots then follow, before Hales slams a drive through the off side and England are underway.
In other news, Andrew Strauss has warned that any players deciding to lozz the Bangladesh tour run the risk of losing their places.
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2nd over: England 8-0 (Roy 2, Hales 5) Sohail Tanvir has the ball and Hales tucks a couple through midwicket, then accepts a wide and takes a single. This is a good start for Pakistan, and then Sohail really bends his back - he’s not the 80mph trundler Bumble was expecting and he bets Roy with an 88er, then again with a cross-seam job. There’s some pace in this track - Joe Root might enjoy batting on it, but then Joe Root enjoys batting on everything. Anyway, Roy cuts the final ball of the over and it flicks up off an old square, catching the diving Imad upside the head.
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1st over: England 2-0 (Roy 1, Hales 1) There’s a right old din as Imad Wasim ambles in - “it’s very horny in here,” fnarr fnarrs Bumble. And he starts well, just two off the over. But, more importantly, look at this!
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“It’s another gorgeous night in Manchester,” says Bumble, Manchester being renowned for its rain, though when I first communicated this to my Mancunian grandmother, I shortly afterwards learnt what the word “vexed” means.
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Jerusalem is being sung and the fielders are trotting out in athletic style. Cricket, where did it all go wrong?
“Please let this match stink,” tweets, er, Phil O’Sophical. “My mates are all going on a fluky corporate hospitality gig and I’m staying in minding my kids.”
I’m sorry to break this to you, but I’m not entirely certain that the quality of the match is going to hamper the quality of their time. Lot of responsibility on your nippers.
Flags at OT are at half-mast, in memory of Lancashire’s Ken Higgs, also of Leicestershire and England, who died today.
“It’s long overdue,” says Andy Gold of test world championship. “My thought is why don’t those nations who are up for league just go ahead and make their own arrangements? Football’s World Cup did just fine for 20 years without the Home Nations (and then even better when England showed up in 1950 only to lose to the USA!) Australia, England, Pakistan, South Africa, New Zealand (and the Windies, with their best players, if we are lucky) would make for a superb competition.”
Though it’s also a different world now, I imagine the problem is that without India, there’s a financial situation. But in theory, I agree - that would be a good competition, though not the exhaustive, comprehensive one that we’re after. What frustrating is that this wasn’t sorted thirty years ago.
Andrew Strauss was saying earlier that England’s fielding has been “unacceptable” this summer. There are some serious aces in this XI, though.
Apparently it’s important to hold catches. More news as I get it.
Paul Farbrace is talking to Athers and he says that fielders are made not born, but Stokes is England’s best because of how well he reads and anticipates the game.
Pakistan, captained for the first time by the wonderful Sarfraz, go with four quicks and a spinner. Our teams in full:
England: Hales, Roy, Root, Morgan, Stokes, Buttler, Ali, Plunkett, Jordan, Willey, Rashid.
Pakistan: Khalid Latif, Sharjeel Khan, Babar Azam, Mohammad Rizwan, Shoaib Malik, Sarfraz Ahmed, Imad Wasim, Wahab Riaz, Sohail Tanvir, Mohammad Amir, Hasan Ali.
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England have left out Mills, Wood, Billings - or, put another way, three incredibly exciting cricketers I was incredibly excited to see. On the other hand, the state of those they have picked.
England win the toss and will bat.
The pitch looks a belter, even through a screen.
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It’s a lovely evening at Old Trafford, and a sell-out. So, the big question: can the punters get themselves sufficiently refreshed in the time allotted?
In other news, Ben Duckett has helped himself to another 208. His county captain is convinced...
Ben Duckett has to play for England ASAP. He is that good
— Alex Wakely (@AlexWakely1) September 7, 2016
In that game, Kent are now 7-2, as well as 154 behind on first innings; elsewhere, Warwickshire need 54, with two second innings wickets intact, to beat Somerset in a joyously wild encounter. You can follow all the action here:
I’m sure there’s something I’m missing, but I’m struggling to grasp why actual guaranteed fixtures, and the goal of promotion, won’t improve the “weaker” teams, and why the hype and thrill of series which mean something, won’t grow the game.
But, of course, we can’t just talk abut cricket, because this afternoon we learnt that plans for a two-tier Test championship have been shelved; I despair.
Please do send in your thoughts about this latest piece of exhibition myopia.
It’s quite spectacular, really, provided you’re not a player; it never stops. And this time next year, we’ll have four-and-a bit days of Test cricket still to play (in theory, they’re against West Indies and what a mess that is); one T20 international; and five ODIs.
Preamble
And now, the end is near
And so we face the final curtain
Cricket we’ll miss it so
They’re killing it, of that we’re certain
We’ve lived a summer full
We’ll be bereft, it’s nearly winter
For three long weeks of woe, but then Fatullah.
