Sixteen wickets on the first day were followed by 17 more on the second, though like the bounce on this mischievous wicket nothing about it felt at all predictable. The day ended in glorious evening sunshine, shadows stretching as England’s lead was slowly, awkwardly reduced. But still the wickets fell, even if in a trickle rather than the torrent that started New Zealand’s first innings, and at 36 for three their target of 254 still feels very distant.
The run chase started terribly, with Tom Latham edging the third ball high to Harry Brook at second slip. Thereafter Kane Williamson and Devon Conway were resolute – and, in Conway’s case, on the right side of an umpire’s call – as they clung on until the final minutes of the day, when Williamson was trapped lbw by Josh Tongue. In the end the only thing that effectively stemmed the stream of dismissals was stumps, which came after another one, the nightwatchman Will O’Rourke bowled by a beauty from Gus Atkinson.
Emilio Gay lived three lives on Friday. The first ended in the 14th over, when he was on 20 and he leaned forward towards a ball from Matt Henry that zipped off the pitch, caught the edge of his bat and spat through the gap between first and second slip. The second finished in the 16th, when he had 24 and he played and missed another of Henry’s deliveries that jagged back and whacked into his front pad. The umpire gave him the benefit of the doubt, and New Zealand chose not to review it, a decision they were left regretting when moments later the TV replays showed they had been just as wrong as he had.
The third, and last, came later in the afternoon session, when Gay had reached 57, the highest score anyone had yet made in a match where batting has been almost insuperably difficult. He reached for a ball from Nathan Smith that held its line and edged a fine catch behind to Tom Blundell.
After 16 wickets on day one, another 17 fell on day two. More overs were bowled, which means batting was slightly less hazardous – but Emilio Gay was still the only player to reach 40. His impressive 57 is the highest score of the match; if it stays that well, England will surely win.
“Not having that umpire’s call (10th over) I’m afraid,” says Gary Naylor. “The ball hit the pad in line. There is no predictive element in the technology here. At Wimbledon next month, if 1% of the ball is catching the line on review, it’s in.”
These days I’m too scared to form an opinion, never mind express it, but you make a persuasive argument. It certainly passed the ‘looks out’ test.
Stumps
Atkinson has one ball left in the over but the wicket means it’s the end of play. There were seven runs before the wicket, a push-drive for three from Conway and then four leg-byes. New Zealand need another 218 runs to win. A long shot, though certainly not beyond the realms.
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WICKET! New Zealand 36-3 (O'Rourke b Atkinson 0)
Gus Atkinson, on for Robinson, bowls O’Rourke with a stunning delivery that straightens dramatically to peg back the off stump. As Nasser says on Sky, a top-order player would have struggled to defend that.
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11th over: New Zealand 29-2 (Conway 9, O’Rourke 0) Josh Tongue couldn’t take a nought-for if he tried. In fact, it’s happened only once in his Test career. That was the first innings of his debut against Ireland in 2023; in the second innings he bulldozed Ireland’s top order to take a five-for. Turns out first impressions don’t always last.
With Rachin Ravindra on a king pair, Will O’Rourke comes out as nightwatchman.
WICKET! New Zealand 29-2 (Williamson LBW b Tongue 18)
Josh Tongue gets the big wicket! Williamson was turned round by a sizzling delivery that him on the back leg in front of off and middle. He reviewed reluctantly, almost apologetically, and DRS confirmed what he already knew.
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10th over: New Zealand 29-1 (Conway 9, Williamson 18) Incidentally, Smith is standing back to Conway because he isn’t batting outside his crease against Robinson.
Conway is not out! It was umpire’s call on impact, not height, and Conway survives. Robinson is a bit unfortunate; it was a beautiful delivery that came back a long way to hit the pad. But he benefitted from umpire’s call when he dismissed Conway last night, so that makes it 1-1.
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England review for LBW against Conway! Jamie Smith comes up to the stumps to keep Williamson in his crease when facing Robinson. A rank bad ball, Robinson’s first of the innings, is cut witheringly for four.
It looks like Robinson doesn’t want Smith up to the stumps, so this is the first test of his relationship with Ben Stokes since his recall.
When Robinson has a huge LBW appeal against Conway turned down later in the over, Stokes has no hesitation in going for a review. This looks really close; it might be umpire’s call on height.
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9th over: New Zealand 24-1 (Conway 9, Williamson 13) That’s much better from Conway, a sweetly timed push through the covers off Tongue. New Zealand are fighting hard to get through to stumps only one down.
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8th over: New Zealand 20-1 (Conway 6, Williamson 12) Nasser Hussain reckons the game is about 60/40 in England’s favour.
Robinson almost changes that when Conway spoons a drive just short of Stokes in the covers. He’s struggling against Robinson and gets a thick inside-edge off the next ball. It runs through square leg for a single.
No wickets for Robinson but figures of 4-1-6-0 reflect how well he has bowled.
7th over: New Zealand 19-1 (Conway 5, Williamson 12) Josh Tongue’s first ball of the innings is pushed classily through mid-off for four by Williamson. He looks in good touch and England will not feel comfortable until he’s gone.
Okay, fair enough, they might feel comfortable if he’s batting beautifully and New Zealand are 60 for 9 chasing 254.
Just under half an hour to play tonight. If New Zealand are only one wicket down at the close, we’ll be set fair for a cracking day on Sunday. (The forecast for tomorrow is wretched.)
6th over: New Zealand 13-1 (Conway 4, Williamson 7) Robinson gets his first look at the left-handed Conway. His first ball snakes past the edge; his fifth kicks to rap Conway on the glove. A maiden.
5th over: New Zealand 13-1 (Conway 4, Williamson 7) The lights are on at Lord’s, but the sun has re-emerged so there isn’t the extravagant movement we saw this time yesterday. Williamson is nonetheless turned round by a lovely delivery from Atkinson that takes a very thick edge and runs away for two.
4th over: New Zealand 11-1 (Conway 4, Williamson 5) That was the last ball of the over. Williamson is batting outside his crease against Robinson. As Nasser Hussain said last night, there’s a strong case for Jamie Smith to move up to the stumps for Robinson – but maybe not when the ball is seaming this much because you risk haemorrhaging byes.
Williamson is not out! In fact it was missing by a fair way; England lose a review.
England review for LBW! Williamson twice offers no stroke to balls from Robinson that don’t miss off stump by much. Only two types of leave and all that.
Robinson has started excellently and has a big LBW appeal turned down when Williamson pushes around his front pad. Stokes reviews but it looks too straight and is probably umpire’s call at best for England.
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3rd over: New Zealand 8-1 (Conway 4, Williamson 3) Conway is living dangerously. He’s beaten by Atkinson either side of a thick edge that runs safely for four. He’s skittering around the crease like Mrs Carberry in Father Ted and looks a shadow of the player who made an awesome 200 at Lord’s on debut five years ago.
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2nd over: New Zealand 4-1 (Conway 0, Williamson 3) The only way is down for Ollie Robinson after last night’s triple-wicket maiden. Yas Rana, friend of the OBO and one of the sharpest minds in the press box or the podcast studio, wrote an excellent piece on Robinson’s return.
Robinson beats Williamson twice in his first over, though the second was from a no-ball.
“Had 30 wickets fallen in less than two days in India or Pakistan, there’d be an immediate outcry in the English (and Australian) press about how unfair the pitch is and how bad the conditions are,” writes Andy Flintoff. “Have you seen similar comments from the media now that it’s happened in England?”
Yep, they’ve been talking about it all day on Sky. I probably sbould have passed judgement on the OBO, though. For the avoidance of doubt: this pitch is crap, and so was Melbourne last year, and I feel for the curators because they have a bloody hard job and I’m fairly sure they didn’t intend to produce crap pitches.
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1st over: New Zealand 1-1 (Conway 0, Williamson 1) Kane Williamson, playing probably his final Test innings at Lord’s, gets off the mark with a quick single. Devon Conway tries to drive his first ball and is beaten.
That was an out-of-character stroke from Latham, who is such a resourceful and responsible batter. He may have been unsetled by the previous ball, which turned him round and thudded into his side.
WICKET! New Zealand 0-1 (Latham c Brook b Atkinson 0)
A perfect start for England. The captain Tom Latham has gone third ball for nought. He snicked a loose drive at a wide outswinger and was smartly grabbed by Harry Brook in the slips.
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Runchase incoming
“My money’s on Scotland to win the World Cup the tie, Rob,” says Simon McMahon.
England have just over an hour with the ball tonight, which is perfect for them and awkward as hell for New Zealand’s top order. Actually, I wonder whether Travis Head would have played the same way at Per- let it go Robert.
WICKET! England 226 all out (Robinson c Phillips b Smith 29)
Robinson clouts Smith a million miles in the air and is taken by Phillips. Smith ends with 6/70 in the innings and 9/108 in the match, and Robinson goes after a useful innings of two halves: 23 from the first 12 balls, 6 from the last 18.
Most importantly, New Zealand need 253 to win. Who’s their Joe Root?
55th over: England 226-9 (Robinson 29, Bashir 0) Bashir offers no stroke to a vile nipbacker from O’Rourke that whacks him in the breadbasket. The next ball swings into the pads but would have missed leg stump.
Tom Latham reviews the decision, simply because New Zealand have two left, but everybody knows the captain lied.
54th over: England 225-9 (Robinson 28, Bashir 0) Nathan Smith is the kind of cricketer who is born underrated.
When I say that, I mean by eejits like me. I doubt England’s top seven undervalue him: he’s dismissed them all bar Jacob Bethell in this game.
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WICKET! England 225-9 (Tongue b Smith 5)
Nathan Smith has a Lord’s five-for! Tongue has been cleaned up by an excellent delivery that held its line to trim the off bail. That’s a nice way for Smith to reach the milestone because his line has been so good all game.
53rd over: England 225-8 (Robinson 28, Tongue 5) Tom Van der Gucht can rest easy: Robinson has put away the lusty heaves and is playing Will O’Rourke with soft hands. At one stage he had 23 from 12 balls; now he’s on 28 from 21.
A single apiece for Robinson and Tongue in that O’Rourke over. England lead by choo hundred and fifty choo.
52nd over: England 223-8 (Robinson 27, Tongue 4) Robinson has been in excellent form with the bat for Sussex this season, averaging 63 in Division One of the County Championship. He’s always been able to bat and has a useful Test average of 15, with a highest score of 58 at Ranchi in 2024. That innings has been forgotten, mainly because it doesn’t fit the narrative that he spent that entire tour having a laugh and not giving a solitary one. But we’re allowed to talk about it now.
“I’m enjoying Robinson’s counter-attack,” says Tom Van der Gucht. “Let’s just hope he doesn’t end up with back spasms from too many lusty heaves...”
Did you ask AI to write that? Has some sicko invented Carry On Claude?
51st over: England 222-8 (Robinson 26, Tongue 4) O’Rourke replaces Jamieson. His first ball almost leads to a wicket when Williamson misses a run-out chance from point. Tongue was well short when the throw whistled past the stumps.
Tongue gets off the mark with a cracking on-drive for four, then deflects four leg-byes off the hip. England lead by 249.
50th over: England 213-8 (Robinson 25, Tongue 0) Earlier in the over, Robinson showed his delicate side by cradling a scared puppy gliding Smith through backward point for four. Tail-end runs are rarely more irritating than when they’re scored a strike rate of almost 200.
WICKET! England 213-8 (Smith b Smith 39)
Mr Smith goes to Mr Smith. It was an unplayable delivery, pretty much: a seaming grubber that sneaked under Jamie Smith’s bat as he tried to defend.
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49th over: England 206-7 (Smith 38, Robinson 19) Robinson wangs Jamieson for two more, addressing the ball with such a lusty heave that he becomes the latest player in this game to break their bat.
A top-edged pull for four brings up England’s 200. Jamieston has had enough and switches to round the wicket. Robinson makes room to force a single to deep midwicket; he has 19 from just 11 balls.
48th over: England 197-7 (Smith 38, Robinson 10) Nathan Smith pitches one up to Robinson, who swings it handsomely over mid-on for four. Yeeha! In this innings, it seems Robinson is far left on the good time/long time spectrum. He smears two more down the ground, then deflects a short ball into his nether regions.
Both he and Nathan Smith ended up on the deck after that delivery. It was also an illegal delivery, prompting a clip-it-up bit of commentary on Sky Sports.
Nasser Hussain “No-ball”
Mark Butcher (after a pregnant pause) “Literally”
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47th over: England 189-7 (Smith 38, Robinson 3) Kyle Jamieson gave the new batter Ollie Robinson some tap this morning. Robinson responds by pulling his first ball brusquely through midwicket for three.
WICKET! England 184-7 (Atkinson ct and b Jamieson 14)
Goodnight Gus. He tried to pull Jamieson, but the ball was too wide for that shot and he could only top-edge it back to the bowler. Jamieson has his first wicket of the innings; New Zealand need three more to set up a runchase.
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46th over: England 184-6 (Smith 36, Atkinson 14) Atkinson takes a single off Smith to make this the highest partnership of the match, 53 runs and counting. Smith toe-ends a drive through extra cover for two, then steals two leg-byes to fine leg. England lead by 211.
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45th over: England 179-6 (Smith 34, Atkinson 13) Atkinson plays a nothing shot off Jamieson and is beaten. Careful now.
“I’d never heard of Paul Gibb, Len Hutton’s opening partner in the timeless Test you mentioned,” writes John Cox, but a quick Wikipedia leaves me wanting more.
“Went to private school and Emmanuel College Cambridge. Scored 97 and 120 odd in his second Test in that match. Flew Catalinas and Sunderlands throughout the war. Played eight Tests in all averaging 44 as a wicketkeeper before getting dropped for Godfrey Evans. Left cricket for four years before becoming the first MCC member to sign a professional contract (for Essex) and being booted out of the MCC. Became a bus driver in Essex and died suddenly aged 63. All while looking like Brian Close’s more austere uncle.
“One of cricket’s myriad untold stories there.”
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44th over: England 176-6 (Smith 33, Atkinson 11) Batting looks relatively comfortable right now, but who knows how long that will last. As that famous cricket tragic Ferris Bueller said, Lord’s moves pretty fast.
So much for batting looking comfortable. Nathan almost wins the Smith-off with a spectacular nipbacker to Jamie; it cuts him in half, misses leg stump by a whisker and flies away for four byes.
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43rd over: England 170-6 (Smith 32, Atkinson 10) Kyle Jamieson, who has been a little underused today, returns after tea. Nothing to report.
“We’ve had 30 individual innings in this Test and only six of them have included more than two boundaries,” notes Tim de Lisle. “One in the first innings (Brook with ten), two in the second (Phillips six, Jamieson five including three sixes), and three so far in the third (Duckett six, Gay eight, Smith six). The only person who got there by playing old-school cricket was the newest recruit.”
“What a truly mystifying first Test, with this wicket turning the Great Reset into a more of Rorschach test,” writes Ben Tyrer-Gay. “Are England suffering from their usual case of collapse-itis or are there signs of a more circumspect approach that has been undone by balls that are shooting low, nipping in extravagantly, or not-really-doing-much-why-didn’t-you-hit-that-Ben?
“I think I’m leaning towards the later, especially with the ominous overheads adding to the general sense of bowler’s paradise, which makes Gay’s knock all the more promising.”
I would lean strongly towards the latter, although Stokes’ form is a major concern.
Also, I had no idea that, in a former life, Ollie Pope was Hermann Rorschach.
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Tea: England lead by 193 runs
A seesaw session at Lord’s. England scored 94 for 5 in 27 overs, but those numbers won’t provide anybody with chapter and verse. England were 126 for 2 and in control; two overs later they were 127 for 6 and it was happening again. But Jamie Smith counter-attacked with authority, Gus Atkinson provided sensible support and the collective heart rate at Lord’s started to drop.
Oh, and we still have no idea who’s going to win this game.
42nd over: England 166-6 (Smith 31, Atkinson 7) Smith plays another majestic cover drive for four, this time off Henry, before punching another boundary through mid-off. Terrific batting. And that, my good friend, is tea.
41st over: England 158-6 (Smith 23, Atkinson 7) This partnership is worth 31, which makes it the fifth-highest of the match. O’Rourke almost ends it with a blistering yorker that knocks Atkinson off his feet. It would have swung past leg stump, a long way past it in fact, and New Zealand’s decision to review was a stinker. They still have two reviews left so it’s not a Headingley 2019 repeat.
40th over: England 157-6 (Smith 22, Atkinson 7) An outswinging yorker from Henry is edged along the ground for a couple by Smith. A single takes England’s lead to 184.
Incidentally, Ben Stokes has scored 15 runs in his last five Test innings. His form has been a worry for a couple of years – he averages 26.88 in his last 25 Tests – and the concern is growing.
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39th over: England 154-6 (Smith 19, Atkinson 7) Smith stands tall to hammer O’Rourke through the covers for four. That’s a helluva shot, and the sound off the bat evoked this bit of Ricky Ponting porn. (Safe for work.)
England lead by 181.
38th over: England 148-6 (Smith 15, Atkinson 6) Matt Henry returns with the keeper up to the stumps. He starts with a maiden to Smith.
“Happy first Test of the summer,” writes Felix Wood. “I’m not saying that you’re personally responsible for England’s imminent collapse and humiliating defeat, but I’m not not saying it. I would really rather like Smith to get rid of his yips please, so if you could avoid saying anything nice about him that would be great. With great power comes great responsibility.”
And with the square root of bugger all power?
37th over: England 148-6 (Smith 15, Atkinson 6) Smith drives O’Rourke sweetly off the back foot for four runs.
A consequence of the recent mayham is that Emilio Gay’s 57 will be England’s highest score of the match. Do you hear that, Dame Fortune? Are you listening? I thnk the last England debutant to do that was Keaton Jennings in 2016-17.
“May I be the first to point out that if only the England batters were allowed some license to express themselves and counter attack against a dominant bowling attack,” says Brian Withington. “This rigid timidity and obsession with playing ‘proper cricket’ is the perennial curse of the national team.”
36th over: England 142-6 (Smith 10, Atkinson 5) Atkinson lashes Nathan Smith through point for his first boundary. Every little helps, and a pair of edges for four from Jamie Smith take England’s lead to 169. The second was close to the flying Phillips in the gully.
“Do we think England already have enough??” asks Phil Harrison. “Not even really joking...”
GOOD BECAUSE THIS IS NO JOKE. If conditions stay like this, they could have declared half an hour ago. But if the sun comes out, 250 might not be enough. And if England set New Zealand a target of exactly 205, I’m off.
35th over: England 129-6 (Smith 2, Atkinson 0) Smith breaks a bat while defending one of O’Rourke’s splice-botherers. While he waits for a replacement, I’ll segue gratuitously into a piece in this month’s Wisden Cricket Monthly on another Kiwi splice-botherer, Bruce Taylor. In the modern game he would be a franchise superstar, and it was a lot of fun reading about his career.
“Hey, remember five-day Tests?” chirps Matt Dony. “Good times…”
Some living souls remember ten-day Tests. I’d love to hear their hot, hot takes on modern batting.
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34th over: England 127-6 (Smith 0, Atkinson 0) A double-wicket maiden for Nathan Smith. Replays show that the ball to Stokes straightened a touch, so it wasn’t quite the case that Stokes missed a straight one. But Stokes at his best, the 2019-21 version, would have dealt with it.
“Rob!” says Richard O’Hagan. “Whatever you’re doing, stop it!”
Given the nonsense I typed about Perth, if this ends in two days, I shall tender my resignation before sundown.
England have lost four wickets for one run in 11 balls. Ben Stokes has been cleaned up by Nathan Smith, having played down the wrong line of a delivery that didn’t do too much. Goodness me.
Before anyone opens their face, all four batters were out to defensive strokes.
WICKET! England 127-6 (Stokes b Smith 0)
Unbelieeeeeeeevable stuff!
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New Zealand have bowled excellently in the last half hour, helped by the cloudy conditions. Incidentally, the last time Joe Root was out in single figures in both innings of a Test was… oh good lord.
“Invoking Perth 2025 straight off the bat, Rob!” sniffs Brian Withington. “Surely best consigned with Adelaide 2006 alongside the Ark in its sealed box in Warehouse 51?”
What has Victoria’s Gerard Denton-inspired Sheffield Shield win over South Australia got to do with anything?
Two wickets in two balls for New Zealand! Nathan Smith pinned Root with a very similar delivery that cut back sharply to hit the pad.
Root was hit above the flap of the pad and eventually reviewed – but it was umpire’s call and he’s out in single figures for the second time.
England were 126 for 2. They are no longer 126 for 2.
WICKET! England 127-5 (Root LBW b Smith 8)
33rd over: England 127-4 (Root 8, Smith 0)
WICKET! England 127-4 (Brook LBW b O'Rourke 0)
Another quick wicket and England might get the heebie-jeebies. This isn’t the Perth Zone, but it is the exact situation they have struggled to maximise in recent years.
Uh-oh, now Harry Brook has gone! He fell over a beautiful inducker from Will O’Rourke and was eventually given out LBW by Rod Tucker. Brook went upstairs but there were three reds and he’s gone for a duck.
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32nd over: England 126-3 (Root 7, Brook 0) That was the last ball of the over. Smith celebrated by running straight to Blundell, though really he should have charged off the field to hug the guy who pounded the footholds a moment earlier.
Replays of Gay’s dismissal show that he could have left the ball from Smith on line, but that’s offensively easy to say from this distance. It was an instinctive flirtation outside off stump, the kind openers live and die by all the time.
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WICKET! England 126-3 (Gay c Blundell b Smith 57)
Emilio Gay’s dreams of a debut century – and our dreams of a debut century for him – are over. Nathan Smith has struck with a good delivery from round the wicket. Gay pushed tentatively and got a thin edge that was well taken just above the ground by Tom Blundell. No real blame attached to Gay, who played nicely.
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31.1 overs: England 124-2 (Gay 56, Root 6) There’s a bit of a break in play while somebody bashes the footholds at the end of from which Nathan Smith is bowling.
31st over: England 124-2 (Gay 56, Root 6) Gay has no chance of laying bat on a grubber from Jamieson. Happily for him, it’s well wide of off stump. Happily for England, who will bowl last, a few balls are starting to shoot through.
Mark Puttick points out that Gay is the first England opener to make a fifty on debut since Haseen Hameed and Keaton Jennings on the 2016-17 tour of India.
In fact he’s the first to reach 25, although there have only been six debutant openers in that time: Mark Stoneman, Rory Burns, Joe Denly, Jason Roy, Dom Sibley and Alex Lees.
Thanks Tanya, hello everyone. England are effectively 148 for 2, which means they’re past the Perth Zone. In that astonishing Test they were seven down by the time the lead reached 148, and then things got even more interesting.
This match is far from a done deal, but we can safely* say it won’t finish inside two days.
* Ish
30th over: England 121-2 (Gay 55, Root 4) There’s some blue sky now creeping over north London. Root is giving himself time to settle and there’s just one from Smith’s over.
“I’ve not seen much of Emilio Gay before,” taps Tom Hopkins, “but he’s a very pleasing presence at the crease. Anyone who plays a late cut like that gets my vote.”
He looks pretty at home, doesn’t he. The players are taking drinks now, so time for me to leave you in the very safe hands of Rob Smyth. Thanks for all your messages and sorry I didn’t get to them all. Bye!
29th over: England 120-2 (Gay 54, Root 4) Root is off the mark, opens the face and sends four skidding to the rope. A leg slip crouches. Five dots from the rest of Jamieson’s over.
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Fifty for Emilio Gay!
28th over: England 116-2 (Gay 54, Root 0) A change of bowling at the Nursery End, as Smith rolls up his sleeves . Another wristy four by Gay through deep third, slightly loopy. Next ball, he drops his hands and guides four to the same place but with less risk. Suddenly he’s on 48 and a couple of runs off his legs brings a debut Test fifty: 84 balls, seven fours. I think he considers for a second taking his helmet off, but thinks better of it, and allows himself a little raise of the bat and a smile. Well played. Polishes off the over with a third four.
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27th over: England 100-2 (Gay 38, Root 0) Root taps his bat on the hard ground, rat-a-tat, a-tat-tat. Jamieson thunders in, Root lets the ball safely pass.
WICKET! Bethell b Henry 14 (England 99-2)
Done by a grubber! The ball barely lifts off the ground after bouncing and shimmies under an airborne Bethell’s bat and into his off stump.
26th over: England 99-2 (Gay 37,) Henry traps Bethell on the crease, then Bethell edges past slip and he’s finally taken out by low bounce. A crucial wicket just as it looked as if these two were taking England away. The lead now 126.
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25th over: England 97-1 (Gay 37, Bethell 12) Time for a bowling change and Jamieson replaces the unlucky O’Rourke after an excellent spell. He’s straight back into the grove for a maiden. Bethell and Gay come together for a chat in the middle, unfamiliar territory for both of them.
24th over: England 97-1 (Gay 37, Bethell 12) There’s a post lunch quiet hum around Lord’s. Henry bounds in, back spasm notwithstanding. A fistful of singles
Hello there Kim Thonger.
“I’m trying to keep up with events while meeting and greeting potential clients at the BADA Fair in Rutland. That’s the British Antique Dealer’s Association for the uninitiated. I’m offering a score update option to everyone I meet and plugging the OBO. Every time England get a boundary I shout BADA Bing BADA Boom and the men in white coats (they’re not umpires) may drag me off soon.”
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23rd over: England 94-1 (Gay 34, Bethell 12) Sky show how hard O’Rourke worked to push Bethell back in his crease so that when he came to drive his balance would be off – only for Conway to shell the catch. He’s still thudding in and gives Bethell another stern examination. Another maiden.
22nd over: England 94-1 (Gay 34, Bethell 12) This is, dare I say it, very sensible from England. Careful. A pushed two here, a single there. Four leg side byes from an off-target Henry are gratefully received.
21st over: England 87-1 (Gay 34, Bethell 9) A 90mph maiden from a cheesed-off O’Rourke.
20th over: England 87-1 (Gay 34, Bethell 9) Three catches now fluffed in this innings, plus the missed chance of a review. In a low-scoring game, particularly galling for the bowlers . Three singles from Henry’s over.
19th over: England 84-1 (Gay 32, Bethell 8) New Zealand, famous for their fielding, suddenly with soapy fingers, drop another. This time Devon Conway, who also dropped Harry Brook in the first innings, fails to collect an awkward drive by Bethell at backward point and fluffs the rebound. O’Rourke, who has been steaming in, is unimpressed,
18th over: England 84-1 (Gay 32, Bethell 8) Bethell is getting some chin music here, Bethell twists into a short ball, neither duck nor dodge and is hit on the shoulder.
An email wings in from Matt Guthrie in Montana. “For Bill Hargreaves and others (over 10), may I recommend the amazing ArtButMakeItSports which juxtaposes action shots from sporting events with similar works of art. Great fun!”
18th over: England 84-1 (Gay 32, Bethell 8) Four leg byes and a couple more runs on the drive from Gay off Henry.
17th over: England 78-1 (Gay 30, Bethell 8) O’Rourke from the pavilion end. A gorgeous square drive, with dipped knee, brings Gay the first boundary of the session.
“Afternoon Tanya,” hello Tom Hopkins.
”I haven’t done the statistical analysis to back this up, but I have the impression that for a lot of years Lord’s Tests tend to have started with a tumble of wickets then the pitch has died a death and we’ve ended up with big scores if not bore draws.
”I’m not sure if that’s happening here, or even if it’ll have time to, but I do wonder if there’s an underlying (literally, I guess!) issue and whether Lord’s gets something of a free pass not afforded to other grounds?”
Interesting hypothesis. I think it definitely gets more of a pass because all the visiting teams want to play there. They haven’t had much rain in the south east recently so I don’t know if that is also a factor. Rob is taking over from me in about an hour and he remembers everything, so try him for a full breakdown.
Afternoon session
16th over: England 73-1 (Gay 25, Bethell 8) The lights are on, the skies are brooding, but the sun, for now, is out. Henry, after two expensive overs this morning, continues. A huge lbw appeal second ball against Gay. Henry is keen, Latham less so, and NZ don’t go upstairs. Ah, they should have done, replays show the ball would have clipped the top of leg stump. The balcony give it out which might be why Latham decides at the last moment to review another lbw against Bethell. This one would just have clipped the top so umpire’s call.
A full session of play and only five wickets to fall. It must have got slightly easier to bat. Possibly. I thought Duckett and Gay batted with real discipline against some excellent Kiwi bowling. The post lunch session will be key
Time for me to grab a sandwich, back shortly.
15th over: England 72-1 (Gay 24, Bethell 8) Bethell gets his eye in before lunch with two fours, one through the covers and one gully. O’Rourke finishes the session with a firecracker that flies up and hits an evading Bethell on glove and chest. Gay and Bethell punch gloves and are applauded through the Long Room and into the dressing room. England’s session – the lead 99.
14th over: England 64-1 (Gay 24, Bethell 0) Henry again. Gay cover drives him with a morale-boosting purr for four, but should have been caught next ball as he edges and the ball flies between diving first and second slips. Four byes completes a helpful 12-run over for England.
13th over: England 52-1 (Gay 16, Bethell 0) Duckett so nearly made it to lunch. O’Rourke greets Bethell with a snorting bouncer that he rather balletically evades.
An email drops from a nearly airborne Charlie Dunmore. “About to take off from Geneva to Heathrow to take my kids to their first ever cricket match. Could only get tickets for the 4th day at Lord’s, so if the wickets keep falling, they may have to settle for Surrey v Hampshire at the Oval, which may not be the experience they were hoping for...” I think the forecast is dodgy for Saturday, so you may still be in luck. If not, the Oval is a great place to watch cricket. The Guardian will be live blogging from that game so drop us a line if you end up having to placate them with your reserve plans.
WICKET! Duckett c Phillips b O'Rourke 33 (England 52-1)
Duckett bends his knees as if he’s about do dig a sandcastle and dollops the ball into the hands of Phillips at gully.
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12th over: England 46-0 (Duckett 27 ,Gay 16) Matt Henry comes in for his first over since his four yesterday. He’s tentative and it’s not terribly successful. His first ball is a fat wide one that Duckett drives down the ground, the next a half volley driven to the long on boundary. The third ball slides past Duckett and hits wicketkeeper Blundell on the end of his fingers, who howls with pain.
11th over: England 35-0 (Duckett 18 ,Gay 15) Gay ducks O’Rourke’s first ball and is lucky to survive a rash drive at his second. Ducks the fifth but slides four through deep third off the final delivery. England just starting to pick up the pace here.
10th over: England 31-0 (Duckett 18 ,Gay 11) Smith hastens in, spidery moustache resting on his lip. At last a wideish ball, and Gay bends his back, rolls his wrists and sends four handsomely towards the Grandstand. Smith is furious with himself and after he collects his cap, wrestles it in frustration.
“I’d love to see Squires do something with that photo from the 25th over,” writes Bill Hargreaves. “He worked wonders with his Caravaggio take on the Arsenal West Ham game.”
9th over: England 24-0 (Duckett 17 ,Gay 5) O’Rourke replaces Jamieson and his first ball is nasty, brutish and short, rapping Duckett’s bottom hand. Duckett pulls his hand away immediately, and the physio runs on and manipulates things. Duckett continues and Rourke pins him in place with six dot balls.
Hello there, Tom van der Gucht.
“The way this pitch sounds to be playing reminds me of Baldrick in Blackadder Goes Fourth when he engraved his name on a bullet as he felt that he’d be less likely to be shot if he owned the said bullet with his name on... Perhaps England should take a leaf out of his book and take the ball with their name on it out of the equation by going hell for leather old-school Bazball style.” I wonder if they might be, had the winter not unravelled as it did.
8th over: England 24-0 (Duckett 17 ,Gay 5) Gay is rapped on the knee and Smith appeals with gusto, but given not out and NZ don’t go upstairs. Outside the line I think.
7th over: England 21-0 (Duckett 14 ,Gay 5) Jamieson smiles a wolfish smile as he sends down something unplayable to Duckett. Gay gets bat firmly on ball and picks up three through midwicket – a pretty challenging workout on debut.
6th over: England 16-0 (Duckett 13 ,Gay 2) A quieter over from Smith.
“I worked with a chap (a committed recreational runner) who had a haircut comparable to Stokes’ previous sweepback,” writes Charlie Tinsley. “He was promptly nicknamed Sonic. I’d be interested in Stokes pre and post haircut bowling speeds.” Are you predicting a Samsonesque loss of powers?
5th over: England 14-0 (Duckett 12, Gay 1) It’s grey over the pavilion, though the sun is shining on Jamieson’s back. Duckett off-drives four, that will be a confidence boost, but now Rachin Ravindra, who dropped Brook in the first innings, lets Duckett through his hands at midwicket. Duckett was out of his crease, steers the ball up, but Ravindra gets in a tangle as he leans forward and the ball appears to miss his hands and hit him in the belly. Jamieson leans over and sighs, hands on shins.
4th over: England 10-0 (Duckett 8, Gay 1) Gay is greeted with a beauty from Smith that swings away and leaves his drive swishing through air. Inside edges his way to the other end, where Duckett axes another four over point. Tricky, tricky conditions and excellent bowling.
3rd over: England 4-0 (Duckett 4, Gay 0) Jamieson continues to torment Duckett, one jags away, another keeps low, until Duckett finally gets bat on ball, over point for four but not with total conviction.
“Morning Tanya,” hello Stef !
“Doing my laundry so in and out. I’m all for exciting cricket but please I don’t want a two- day test I’ve still got the clothes to dry and be ironed.” I’m with you all the way – that’s exactly how I felt during the Ashes – I wanted five days out of every Test to carry me through the winter.
2nd over: England 0-0 (Duckett 0, Gay 0) While Piers Morgan and Alec Stewart roar with laughter over a glass of champagne in one of the boxes, Emilio Gay has the more difficult task of dealing with Nathan Smith. He edges a couple towards the slip cordon, but with dropped wrists. Shoulders arms at a couple more. And has a final woofing drive and miss at the last ball, then blows his lips out in a sigh of frustration/relief.
1st over: England 0-0 (Duckett 0, Gay 0) Jamieson pulls on his seven-league boots. Duckett defends sensibly for two balls then is lured into a stroke or two and is flummoxed completely by a final delivery on song.
A New Zealand huddle, at what looks like an overcast Lord’s.
“As much as I like it hooping around, do you ever think back to all those ‘unfit, unplayable’ Bunsens in India and Pakistan and acknowledge some of the rank hypocrisy of the England pundits?” writes Simon Thomas. “It’s great fun when the wickets are tumbling in England but it is a disgrace when local conditions apply elsewhere.
“It was good fun though.”
Very true Simon. And here come Duckett and Gay through the pavilion and down the steps.
A dream comeback for Robinson, three wickets in his first over, five in the innings – his fourth five-wicket haul in Tests.
And the excellent Josh Tongue now has 40 wickets in six and a half Tests, averaging 23.
On comes the heavy roller, and a bit of reading for the change of innings.
WICKET! Henry b Robinson 0 (New Zealand 113 all out, trail England by 27)
Henry shuffles gingerly backwards and loses his middle stump! A chuffed-to-bits Robinson collects his fifth wicket, holds up the ball and marches England off the field. The lead over New Zealand is a useful 27.
29.5 overs: New Zealand 113 all out ( Jamieson 38) Jamieson might as well go for glory and clubs Robinson over long on and out of reach of the chasing Stokes. Takes a single from the fourth ball leaving Henry to stump-dancing fate.
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29th over: New Zealand 108-9 ( Jamieson 33, Henry 0 ) Atkinson replaces Tongue from the pavilion end, his first ball is wide and stylishly driven square by Jamison for a single, which exposes O’Rourke who lasts no longer. Matt Henry survives four balls.
WICKET! O'Rourke c Brook b Atkinson 1 (New Zealand 108-9)
Atkinson’s second ball of the morning, a tumbling wobble seam, and O’Rourke obligingly gets low and guides the ball to Brook at second slip.
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Overseas TMS link
28th over: New Zealand 107-8 ( Jamieson 32, O’ Rourke 1) Robinson continues after a long chat with Stokes, who shuffles the field mid over and adds a slip for O’Rourke. Emilio Gay goes under the helmet for the last ball of the over. Good to be kept busy on Test debut – but the pressure!
And thank you to Tom Thronicker in Spain for supplying the overseas TMS link.
27th over: New Zealand 106-8 ( Jamieson 31, O’ Rourke 1) Tongue reapplies the tourniquet. Back on message. Squeaks one, two, past O’Rourke’s careful outside edge.
26th over: New Zealand 105-8 ( Jamieson 30, O’ Rourke 1) Take that! Jamieson clobbers a bouncer from Robinson into the Grandstand. And another, next ball, also a pedestrian bouncer. “Stokes needs to have a word with his bowlers,” says Nasser. “They need to keep aiming at off stump.”
“Morning, From a chilly but clear Joburg!” says Duncan Bonnett. “If nobody is blaming the pitch, I suppose we’ve moved from Bazball to Bazbowl? Mayhem for the rest of the day?” Personally, I favour a long period of calm, I’m supposed to be going to Lord’s tomorrow.
25th over: New Zealand 90-8 ( Jamieson 16, O’ Rourke 0) Tongue plumps for a slower ball and Jamieson leans back and fires him straight back into the pavilion for six, scattering the egg and bacon blazers. Nearly treads on his stump next ball as he jumps back into his crease with his colossal boots. O’Rourke uncomfortably survives three balls near 90mph.
Matt Henry, off the field yesterday with a back spasm, will have a bat reports TMS.
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24th over: New Zealand 83-8 ( Jamieson 9, O’ Rourke 0) Just one from Robinson’s over – New Zealand still trail by 57.
WICKET! Smith b Tongue 15 (New Zealand 82-8)
Smith carefully watches Tongue’s delivery, tucks up his bat, jumps, and neatly leaves the ball, allowing it to crunch into the top of off stump.
23rd over: New Zealand 82-8 ( Jamieson 8, O’ Rourke 0) Ooof, Tongue fires a ball in, which rises and crashes into Jamieson’s helmet as he swivels - takes quite some doing at six foot eight. Tongue, nice man that he is, looks concerned and if he’s ok. He is. Smith runs four down to the rope shortly before he becomes the third man in the match to be bowled leaving the ball.
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22nd over: New Zealand 77-7 ( Smith 11, Jamieson 7) Jamieson gets his boundary at the third time of asking, flashing Robinson to the third man boundary and generally causing chaos.
“I was watching the Test highlights on the iPlayer earlier,” writes John Starbuck, “and struck by the amount of facial hair on both teams. Does this herald a return to the Golden Days of WG and the like?” So true, I think Bethell and Jamie Smith are the only baby-faced English players. I love a bit of stubble so fully approve.
21st over: New Zealand 70-7 ( Smith 10, Jamieson 1 ) Jamieson marches in with intent after Philips loses his off stump. Bangs into a drive, throws the combine harvester at another, but only picks up one run. Smith drives the smiling Tongue’s last ball for four.
WICKET! Phillips b Tongue 34 (New Zealand 65-7)
Tongue’s first ball of the day fractionally straightens and Philips plays… and misses. A satisfying crunch of stumps.
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20th over: New Zealand 65-6 (Phillips 34, Smith 6) Ben Stokes, newly shorn of his 1950s sweep-back, completes his over started yesterday. A no ball and Phillips sends him sweetly down to backward point for three.
“Plus ca change,” says Mark Puttick.
“Almost exactly four years since England last played New Zealand at Lord’s
2022: England’s 1st inns, 141-10, 42.5 overs
2026: England’s 1st inns, 140-10, 39.4 overs
2022: NZ 1st inns, found themselves 2-2 & 12-4, both Mitchell & Blundell were bowled as NZ folded to 36-6.
2026: NZ 1st Inns, found themselves 2-2 & 12-4, both Mitchell & Blundell were bowled as NZ folded to 29-6
England batted 2nd in 2022 though.”
Incredible symmetry.
“Good morning Tanya,” hello Krishnamoorthy V!
“Looks like the match may get over today. While we wait for it to start , have you been following this new sensation Vaibhav Sooryavanshi who is one part Viv Richards, one part Sachin Tendulkar and one part Matthew Hayden. Bowlers world over must be having nightmares featuring him.”
He’s incredible isn’t he? There’s part of me that things he’s too young to deal with the pressure and adulation, but he seems to be taking it in his stride. It can’t be long before he gets a tap on the shoulder from the Indian hierachy.
Session times for day two
Ninety-eight overs are due today after yesterday’s rain.
Morning Session: 1100-1315
Afternoon Session: 1355-1610
Evening Session: 1630-1830
Red for Ruth
A deeply moving piece of television on Sky about the Ruth Strauss Foundation. Two young mums speak about living with a stage four cancer diagnosis, and another about the death of her husband – 127 children lose a parent every day in the UK. For some reason I can’t access the Ruth Strauss Foundation website, but you can google it if you would like to donate.
A thoughtful piece from Andy Bull on Brendan McCullum which contains the killer line – “only two of that team that played [at Lord’s] back in 2022, Ben Stokes and Joe Root, made it all the way through the cycle back to this match.”
Mike Atherton and Stuart Broad are in red blazers on Red for Ruth day at Lord’s. They laud Ollie Robinson. “He moved the ball and in such a dangerous area,” says Broad, “he was immaculate in his length and more importantly in his line.”
Preamble
Good morning and welcome to day two of the first Test of the summer, the morning after the evening before, when everyone staggered over the line at twenty past seven, punch drunk and 16 wickets poorer.
It was a fast-food order of a first day, punchy innings from Harry Brook and Glenn Phillips the only ballast against the clattering of wickets between the showers. Kyle Jamieson finished with five for 62 on his comeback after a stress-fracture, and Ollie Robinson four for ten, including an extraordinary triple-wicket maiden in his first over back after a two-year hiatus.
The weather looks better for today, batting should be easier, which may be some consolation for those looking at their weekend tickets and wondering whether they’ll have anything to watch. Play starts at 11am BST, do join us.
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