India started the day on 276 for three, and well on top. But KL Rahul fell for 129 in the first over of the day and England chipped away impressively to take the last seven wickets for 88 runs. Jimmy Anderson picked up five for 62, his 31st five-wicket haul, and again shamed just about every 39-year-old male on the planet.
England got off to a horrible start with the bat. Dom Sibley walked into a leg-side trap and Haseeb Hameed was bowled first ball on his return to the side. But Rory Burns made an assured 49 and Joe Root dug in to make 48 not out. England have never lost a Test when he has made a century. And in the context of this game, I have no idea whether that’s a good thing or not. Thanks for your company, goodnight.
Close of play
45th over: England 119-3 (Root 48, Bairstow 6) Siraj, who has bowled 13 overs in little more than three hours, is still steaming in. He beats Bairstow again with a jaffa outside off stump, and that’s the end of a fascinating day’s cricket. It was England’s day, but India are on top in the match.
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44th over: England 118-3 (Root 48, Bairstow 6) England tick off another over from Shami. There will be time for one more before the close, two if Siraj gets a wriggle on.
“On the ball colour and gloomy conditions issue, this was much discussed during the previous Test,” says Arthur Graves. “But it could be mitigated by batsmen being able to request the pink ball if the umpire’s light meters show a certain level of gloom...”
Trouble is, the pink ball can go round corners. I think you need to have the same colour throughout a match, or the variables could be too great.
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43rd over: England 114-3 (Root 46, Bairstow 5) Siraj thinks he has Bairstow caught behind by a beautiful fourth-stump delivery. He skips the appeal and proceeds straight to the celebration, putting his finger to his lips and imploring Bairstow to make eye contact. But Michael Gough gives it not out and India decide not to risk their last review. Replays show that to be a wise decision from Virat Kohli, as there was nothing on UltraEdge. Siraj is a seriously good bowler but he is hopeless when it comes to appealing.
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42nd over: England 114-3 (Root 45, Bairstow 5) Bairstow gets off the mark with a quick single to backward point - and gets four bonus runs when Jadeja’s throw flies to the boundary. Bairstow would have been home even with a direct hit, though it was tight enough for Jadeja’s throw to be justified.
“I have to ask...are the floodlights used during day matches different to those at night?” asks Brendan Large. “If not, how is it possible to go off for bad light on a floodlit pitch. Come on cricket!”
It’s to do with the colour of the ball – red in Tests, pink in day-night Tests and white in, well, white-ball cricket. They haven’t yet been able to invent a pink (or white) ball that behaves exactly like a red one.
Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere’s Jonny. No nightwatchman, which is a big surprise.
Mohammed Shami strikes with the second ball of a new spell. Burns played extremely well for his 49, which will offer him precisely bugger all comfort. As he walks off, his expression is a mixture of confusion, regret and slight anger.
WICKET! England 108-3 (Burns LBW b Shami 49)
He’s out! That looked pretty high - I think it hit him above the knee roll - but ball-tracking said it was hitting below the bails. It was a slightly absent-minded shot from Burns, no worse than that. Against class bowlers, even small mistakes can get punished.
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BURNS IS GIVEN OUT LBW AND REVIEWS! This might be high. The umpire is not Michael Gough, which gives me a soupcon of hope from an England perspective.
41st over: England 108-2 (Burns 49, Root 43) A big inducker from the impressive Siraj beats Root on the inside as he launches into a drive. It feels like Root hasn’t been as fluent as he was at Trent Bridge; he still has 43 not out from 70 balls. To be quite frank, I’m starting to find his effortless brilliance somewhat offensive.
40th over: England 104-2 (Burns 47, Root 41) It’s getting pretty gloomy at Lord’s. England will be fuming if they lose a wicket before the close because the ball isn’t doing much for the seamers or Jadeja. Another quite over from him yields three runs.
“I agree that it’s almost impossible to assess where this England team is at the moment,” says Robert Ellson. “But it struck me that they won in India a few years ago with essentially a four-man team (Cook, KP, Monty, Swann). So this current team is halfway there.”
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39th over: England 101-2 (Burns 46, Root 39) Burns almost gives his wicket away, cutting Siraj to gully on the half-volley. The umpires go upstairs to check, just in case, but replays show that it landed just short ofKL Rahul.
38th over: England 100-2 (Burns 46, Root 38) A quick single from Root brings up the England hundred, before Burns survives an appeal for a bat-pad catch at short leg. He didn’t hit it.
37th over: England 98-2 (Burns 45, Root 38) The irrepressible Mohammed Siraj returns to the attack. His first ball is too wide, allowing Root to punch a couple off the back foot. There are 15 overs remaining, though we won’t get them all in.
“I think the point about Hameed being thrown in at three is such a good one,” says Jimmy Ainsworth. “I’ve heard barely anything from the cricket commentariat about this until after the person fails - see also Crawley opening, Pope originally dropped in at No4 in the order. It’s all redolent of a selection regime where they pick the best 6 batters they can think of, then work out where in the order to pick them, rather than working out who might complement who. Very Lampard-Gerrardesque, with similar results.”
I think the top three should be treated almost like a separate team. Normally I don’t mind an opener batting at No3 – there isn’t much difference, especially in this team. But with everything Hameed has been through, the circumstances of his recall had to be just right, and as familiar as possible. He hasn’t batted at No3 in over two years, so his whole routine was different. That exacerbates nerves, and the shot he played was a pretty good advert for the power of the amygdala.
36th over: England 92-2 (Burns 43, Root 34)
35th over: England 91-2 (Burns 43, Root 33) Bumrah angles a full delivery into Root, who flicks it crisply through midwicket for two. Root hasn’t been quite as fluent today as he was at Trent Bridge, but he’s still a class apart and he moves into the thirties with an elegant open-faced steer for four.
“Without wanting to get overly philosophical, might part of the Test team’s travails be rooted in the format itself?” says Max Williams. “Not merely its longevity - who wants five days of 90 overs when you can have two hours of 20 (/40) - but the lack of climax: there is no World Cup, no peak to aim for. Test cricket just exists; it matters precisely as much as you want it to matter. Triumph and disaster can be treated the same because they essentially ARE the same: losing at home to India won’t eliminate us from the Ashes. It’s a large part of why we love the game but you can understand why the commercially minded ECB prefers to put its eggs in the more marketable white ball basket, with their cups and finals and narrative clarity.
“And yes, I know, World Test Championship - but the idea is such anathema to the format (a tournament that takes two years to crown a winner!) you might as well attempt to drain a river with a fork. Test series need to be treated (and marketed) as entirely self-contained, rather than jammed into a non-existent narrative framework that only serves to diminish their importance. (How will this series affect the Ashes? How will the Ashes affect the next Ashes?)”
I know what you mean, though I wouldn’t go that far. But cricket is partly an individual sport, and in a Test match all 22 players are fighting for something: it might be their place, their legacy, their stats, their central contract, their dignity. It’ll become more of a problem in time, but for now I still think Test cricket aches with importance for those involved. England just aren’t very good at it at the moment, largely because of their Faustian pact to win the 2019 World Cup. I’ve probably used Faust wrongly there. I’m not the brightest, I won’t lie to you.
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34th over: England 83-2 (Burns 43, Root 26) More technical problems, I’m afraid, though I can happily report that England still haven’t lost a wicket since they last lost one. Ravindra Jadeja has come on to bowl his canny left-arm spin.
32nd over: England 78-2 (Burns 40, Root 24) Burns hammers Ishant through the cover for four, a shot of rousing authority. When he bats like this, he looks for all the world like a reliable Test opener, but then he finds a weird and wonderful way to get out. I think that, cashing in when he gets a start, is the key for Burns. You can accept the low scores, which are an occupational hazard for English openers in particular. But if he can convert more scores between 20 and 59 - which account for a third of his Test dismissals - his average will be closer to 40 than 30.
31st over: England 74-2 (Burns 36, Root 24) Bumrah bowls an outstanding over to Burns from round the wicket. A defensive shot from Burns bounces over the stumps, then he leaves a ball that only just misses the off stump. It was a good leave, I think, but it was still perilously close.
“I find this continued beating of Root for targeting seven wins this summer a bit weird,” says Will Vignoles. “He was talking about it being an ideal situation in the context of creating a winning side and mentality, not doing a Glenn McGrath and blithely predicting it.”
I totally agree. Had he told the truth – “I’d love us to win both series but come on, have you watched us lately?” – he’d have been slaughtered. Instead he played the media game, albeit a little clumsily, and now he’s being criticised for that.
30th over: England 73-2 (Burns 35, Root 25) Root steers Ishant to third man for four to bring up an impressive, level-headed fifty partnership. The moment I type that, Root feels for a good delivery from Ishant and is beaten.
“For all the sorrow at poor Hameed’s horror and the sniping at Sibley’s shocker,” says Brian Withington, “England will be reflecting on a fine day’s play if these two can somehow make it through to stumps. Cracking cricket.”
A very good point. I’m confused about where England are as a Test team. Instinctively it feels like they are stumbling into the darkness. Yet they are competing, just about, with an India team that won in Australia, and that’s without four of their best players.
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29th over: England 67-2 (Burns 35, Root 18) Siraj off, Bumrah on. His first ball is slightly too straight, which allows Burns to time it off the hip through midwicket for four. That’s his fourth boundary in six balls, before which he’d scored two in 80. Who does he think he is, KL Rahul?
“Lotta ins, lotta outs, lotta what-have-yous...” says Brian McCloskey. “But at least the Dude ended up with the ashes...”
Arf, very good. (NB: Clip contains adult language and black humour that you may want to find offensive.)
28th over: England 62-2 (Burns 31, Root 18) Root cuts Sharma for four, a shot that takes him past Graham Gooch and up to No2 on the list of England’s highest Test runscorers. Just Sir Alastair Cook to go, albeit 3467 runs away.
The next ball disappeared for four as well - the fifth boundary in seven balls - but that time Root was pretty fortunate. At least I think he was, though it’s hard to be entirely certain. He opened the face and half-edged, half-steered the ball into the gap between slip and gully.
27th over: England 54-2 (Burns 31, Root 10) Siraj will continue into the eighth over of his spell. No surprise given how well he has bowled at Root, though for now it’s Burns who is on strike. The camera cuts to David Gower in the crowd, holding a glass of red wine and wearing a burgundy jacket that bears a troubling resemblance to Hugh Hefner’s smoking jacket.
Back in the middle, Burns makes Siraj regret his decision to bowl an eighth over by hitting him for three boundaries. The first was timed down the ground, the second and third dumped through midwicket. The good news is that Burns is playing really well. The bad news is that Burns is playing really well.
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26th over: England 42-2 (Burns 19, Root 10) One from Sharma’s latest over. Burns and Root are going nowhere, which is both bad (scoring rate) and good (they’re still in the middle).
“This England team really do have the whiff of the 90s vintage, don’t they?” says Mike Rogers. “All but one of the batsmen look in a real state, they’re missing straight ones, and better players than those in the XI have been discarded. They’re even pretending to be rubbish at fielding. Those of them who are still shaving will have stopped by the third test no doubt. In all seriousness, there just doesn’t seem to be a culture of excellence around the test team, certainly in the batting, in strange contrast to that engendered by the white-ball sides. Why is that, do you think?”
It’s a complicated case - lotta ins, lotta outs, lotta what-have-yous. You’d need a dissertation to cover the subject properly. There are loads of factors, though personally I blame Kevin Pietersen for making an entire generation want to hit sixes and entertain people.
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25th over: England 41-2 (Burns 18, Root 10) A couple of sharp nipbackers from Siraj are defended well by Root. He is largely in survival mode at the moment, certainly against Siraj, and it’s another maiden.
24th over: England 41-2 (Burns 18, Root 10) Ishant Sharma returns in place of Shami (6-1-14-0), and goes straight round the wicket to Burns. A misfield from the sub Axar Patel at square leg gives Burns a couple of runs; then Burns is beaten on the inside as he throws his hands at a tempting wide half-volley. England trail by 323.
“Sadly it seems to me that just as the England footy team has finally become both credible and likeable the cricket team has picked up some of their old bad habits, specifically a ludicrous over-assessment of their own qualities,” says David Hopkins. “What on earth possessed Root to think this lot could run through New Zealand and India seven to nothing?!”
Everyone has a soundbite until they get punched in the face.
23rd over: England 39-2 (Burns 16, Root 10) A maiden from Siraj, who has bowled a cracking spell of 6-3-9-2. Just about the only thing he can’t do is judge when to review.
ROOT IS NOT OUT! It was missing leg stump again, so India are down to their last review. And Michael Gough has got yet another decision correct. That was a really seductive appeal, more so than the first, because Root got in a real tangle and the ball did a lot off the seam. But Gough was spot on, yet again. He is phenomenal.
ANOTHER INDIA REVIEW FOR LBW AGAINST ROOT! Siraj is definitely bowling for an LBW with Root, who does occasionally fall over towards the off side. The Aussies in particular have had a lot of success with that tactic. And now Root survives a huge LBW appeal! It came back a long way off the seam, and I reckon it’s umpire’s call at best. Kohli waits until the last second, grimaces and then goes for the review! That was very funny.
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22nd over: England 39-2 (Burns 16, Root 10) A rare bit of width from Shami allows Burns to guide a back cut for four. Amid the mayham, he has played pretty well.
“Dear Rob,” says Tom Wein. “It’s amazing how much of Hameed’s career seems to play out in these novelistic broad strokes, these thrilling moments of grand personal drama. It’s all very operatic. It can be hard to remember that he’s actually a real, highly skilled professional, wrestling with technical challenges.”
And that he’s still only 24 years old. England need(ed) to play the long game with him.
Way-hay!
Hameed's duck was the 14th by an England top 3 batter in Tests this year - the most top-3 ducks in a calendar year by any team in Test history. https://t.co/nGPu2Kx8ya #ENGvIND
— Andy Zaltzman (@ZaltzCricket) August 13, 2021
21st over: England 35-2 (Burns 12, Root 10) Earlier in the over, a poor ball from Siraj was flicked to fine leg for four by Root. It was almost identical to the delivery that got Sibley out - very full and speared down the leg side. That dismissal betrayed a scrambled brain, which is particularly worrying with Sibley, as his mind is his greatest strength.
“Hi Rob,” says Ian Copestake. “Gary Naylor’s 17th over apartheid memories reminded me of my own confusion and shock at the headline ‘Global Boycott Announced’.”
Root is not out! Erm, it was missing leg stump. As you were. Michael Gough strikes yet again! He is a sensational umpire, Bradmanesque even.
Root fell over a good ball from Siraj that homed in on his front pad. Michael Gough said not out and I suspect that will be decisive. It could be out though, it’s so tight.
INDIA APPEAL FOR LBW AGAINST ROOT! This is seriously close but I think Root will just survive.
20th over: England 29-2 (Burns 11, Root 6) Shami has a muted LBW shout against Root turned down. He knew the ball was missing leg, but because it was Root he got excited for a second. India are bowling beautifully, with precision, intelligence and intensity. Since racing to 23 for 0 off 14 overs at tea, England are six for two off six overs.
19th over: England 28-2 (Burns 11, Root 5) “Dear Rob,” says Robert Wilson. “That’s a late 80s/early 90s ouch on Hameed’s first baller. That’s Matthew Maynard’s helmet or Andy Lloyd’s everything. All sport can be cruel but cricket’s cruelty can seem more flagrant and more Aristotleian than a kick in the ads from Graeme Souness. That’s a really confidence-killing piece of misadventure, there. You did ring the warning bell, in fairness to you.”
It’s not easy having such vivid empathy with failure, unfulfilled promise and soul-strangling regret, but someone’s gotta do it. On a serious note - because sometimes the laughter has to stop - if England jigger Hameed’s career with a wildly premature recall, I’ll do something regrettable to the Lord’s architecture with a spray can. And it won’t be ‘LBW b Alderman’.
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18th over: England 28-2 (Burns 11, Root 5) Shami strays onto the pads of Root, who chips it straight to midwicket flicks it behind square for four with a flourish. He has started his innings with an admirably clear head.
“Who was it who said that one good session won’t win you a cricket match, but one bad session can lose it for you?” says Charles Sheldrick. “India had one bad session this morning, England have had three and are heading for a fourth…”
I’ve never quite understood that point. Surely if one team has had a bad, potentially match-losing session, the opposition must have had a good, potentially match-winning one.
17th over: England 24-2 (Burns 11, Root 1) I think Rory Burns is still in decent form, though it’s hard to be sure with this England batting line-up. He has played and missed a few times in this innings, but you’d expect that against quality new-ball bowling. And, for that matter, quality newish-ball bowling: Siraj switches to round the wicket and beats Burns with a lovely delivery.
“On the graffiti point, I think there was a wall in Finsbury Park that had ‘BOTHA OUT’ graffitied thereon referring to PW, the South African leader,” says Gary Naylor. “Cricket fans being very much across events as Apartheid collapsed, it was no surprise to see ‘LBW Alderman’ appended. Though, at this distance, my memory is hazy.”
16th over: England 24-2 (Burns 11, Root 1) I bet Joe Root’s internal monologue is a hoot right now. I’m possibly lost in the moment, but I can’t remember a time - not even in the first few years of Mike Atherton’s reign - when England were as dependent on their captain for runs. It already looks a different game with him out there, and he plays out a maiden from Shami without alarm.
15th over: England 24-2 (Burns 11, Root 1) Sibley, by the way, was furious with himself when he was out. He swished his bat angrily, which is unlike him. As for Hameed, the more you see that dismissal, the worse it gets. I’m sure it was down to nerves, but I also think he has been recalled way too soon - and in the wrong position.
“Brearley also records that one of Alderman’s attributes which helped him enormously was his apparent full smile at the batsman just before the ball was released,” says John Starbuck. “He was only grimacing, of course, but it did put off a lot of people.”
So that’s why Phil DeFreitas bowled with the grimace of a man being tickled in the middle of an orgasm.
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Here comes the hat-trick ball... and Joe Root shows how to keep out a straight delivery.
That was, I’m sad to say, a slightly alarming shot from Hameed. He missed a straight one, and by a fair distance. It was a good ball, bang on the money, but it didn’t deviate at all.
WICKET! England 23-2 (Hameed b Siraj 0)
Hameed has gone first ball! It was fast, full and straight from Siraj, and Hameed just played down the wrong line.
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Be still our beating heart Haseeb Hameed is the new batsman.
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WICKET! England 23-1 (Sibley c Rahane b Siraj 11)
Two balls after tea, Dom Sibley walks straight into India’s trap. It was a dreadful ball from Siraj, sliding down the leg side, and Sibley chipped it straight to Rahane at midwicket.
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Teatime reading
Tea
14th over: England 23-0 (trail by 341 runs; Burns 11, Sibley 11) Shami appeals belatedly for caught behind when Sibley fences at a shortish delivery outside off stump. Kohli teases everyone about a possible review and then turns his back with the DRS timer on 1. Replays show that it missed the outside edge - just - and Kohli breaks into a big smile upon realising that he hadn’t wasted a review.
Shami ends another superb over - and the afternoon session - by slipping one past Burns’ outside edge. It was a torrid little spell for England’s openers, who played and missed on a number of occasions. But they got through it, and both will resume after tea on 11 not out from 42 balls. See you in 15 minutes or so.
13th over: England 20-0 (Burns 11, Sibley 8) A double bowling change, with the feisty Mohammed Siraj replacing Sharma. He immediately causes problems for Burns, who plays and misses at the first and third deliveries and mistimes a pull off the second that loops just over midwicket. It hasn’t been easy - nobody said it would be - but England’s openers are six balls away from surviving a tricky mini-session.
“Hello from Lord’s,” says Jim Harris, “where most people have now wandered back from whatever agreeable lunch was stashed in their hampers, and I find myself wondering whether there was ever an uglier pair of opening bowling actions hurling the ball to a more inelegant pair of opening batting stances? Ugly/elegant/effective thoughts?”
Now that’s a question. Short of Paul Adams and Colin Croft taking the new ball against Kim Barnett and Peter Willey, I’m struggling to think of a worthy foursome.
12th over: England 18-0 (Burns 9, Sibley 8) Mohammed Shami replaces Jasprit Bumrah, who bowled a fine first spell of 5-2-4-0. Shami’s first ball is a peach, which snaps off the seam to beat Sibley’s defensive push. “I bet you this seam is bolt upright,” says Athers, and a replay shows that it was. Sibley ends the over with a back-foot force through the covers for two. Yet again, Sibley has made a start.
“There is a nice segue between the Brearley talk, and your mention of Thatcher out,” says Nick Parish. “In his brilliant book Phoenix From The Ashes, Brearley records that during the 1981 Ashes series, one English player - possibly Gooch - was out so often to Alderman that underneath some graffiti proclaiming ‘THATCHER OUT’, some wag had added ‘lbw b Alderman 0’. I really, really hope that is a true story.”
Wasn’t it in 1989? That’s why I mentioned it, because Allan Border had similarly funky fields for Alderman to Gooch, who got in such a muddle that he kept falling over and getting out LBW b Alderman. I might be wrong but I’m pretty sure that graffiti story - which whether it’s true or not is a gem - was made up by our own Lord Selvey.
11th over: England 16-0 (Burns 9, Sibley 6) With around 15 minutes to go until tea, Sharma starts his sixth over. Sibley forces a single through backward point off the final delivery. He wanted two but Burns, realising the fielder was Jadeja, sent him back. “Careful, careful!” says Mike Atherton, who knows all about the horrors of a run-out at Lord’s.
10th over: England 15-0 (Burns 9, Sibley 5) “It’s a given that some cricketers are better at certain parts of the game than others of course, but is there really any excuse for a ’rabbit’ these days?” says Julian Menz. “No batting coach can turn an 11 into Bradman, but surely there are certain basics that even the most ungifted of willow-wielders can learn with a few hours in the nets. Lower order tenacity can be pivotal, Jack Leach being the obvious example.”
I’d be very surprised if there are many people who don’t work at it, though I agree that some probably take it more seriously than others. But if Jimmy Anderson wants to spend precisely 0.00 per cent of his preparation time on his batting, I can live with that. One thing that has always puzzled me is that the stats for tailend runs have never really changed over the time, which completely contradicts what we think we know. The decade in which Nos 8-11 had the highest Test average is... the 1920s. That can’t all be down to Jack Gregory.
9th over: England 15-0 (Burns 9, Sibley 5) Virat Kohli has gone funky with his field for Sharma to Sibley, who does so much of his run-scoring by working the ball to leg. There’s a short midwicket, a kind of short forward short leg and a very silly mid-on almost next to the non-striker. For some reason I now have ‘Thatcher Out!’ in my head. Sibley, who really should take the field change as a compliment, plays out another maiden. Both batsmen have faced 27 balls; Burns has nine runs, Sibley five.
8th over: England 15-0 (Burns 9, Sibley 5) Bumrah continues to interrogate Sibley, who edges consecutive deliveries on the bounce to Rahane at fourth slip. The first really close to a chance; it arrived almost on the half-volley. There really should be a long beep before every Bumrah over.
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7th over: England 14-0 (Burns 9, Sibley 4) Burns flicks Sharma to fine leg for four. It was in the air, and Pant dived optimistically to his right, but he was nowhere near it. There’s plenty of movement for both bowlers, mainly swing, so England will be pleased if they get through to tea unscathed.
6th over: England 10-0 (Burns 5, Sibley 4) Burns flicks Bumrah off the pads for three, a confident if slightly heartstopping stroke: had he missed, he’d have been plumb LBW. Sibley is beaten by consecutive deliveries from Bumrah, the second a lovely full-length outswinger that tempted Sibley out of himself and into a big attempted drive. Nobody said it was easy.
Jimmy Anderson’s first five-wicket haul against India at Lord’s in 2007 included Dravid, Tendulkar and Ganguly. And his five-wicket haul at Lord’s against India in 2021 includes the scalps of Rohit Sharma, Pujara & Rahane. Speak about being a multi-generational nemesis #ENGvIND
— Bharat Sundaresan (@beastieboy07) August 13, 2021
5th over: England 7-0 (Burns 2, Sibley 4) Thanks Tim, hello everyone. Please bear with me - I’ve having all sorts of technical problems, which might be technology’s way of commenting on the batting methods of Rory Burns and Dom Sibley. If it carries on I might throw my wicket away, or my computer out the window.
4th over: England 7-0 (Burns 2, Sibley 4) Burns is facing Bumrah again, which is better for the purposes of alliteration than for any England fan’s peace of mind, but he gets through the over. That’s a maiden and it’s time for me to hand the fountain pen to Rob Smyth. Thanks for your excellent company and correspondence.
3rd over: England 7-0 (Burns 2, Sibley 4) Burns, who shuffles across his stumps almost as much as Ishant, shuffles across to Ishant and nurdles a single. Sibley gets an edge into the pad but then plays a glorious shot!! Straight back past the bowler for four. “If he’s hitting it straight down the ground,” says Andrew Strauss, who has brought his red suit to the commentary box, “he’ll know he’s balanced.”
“Just checked the cricket score for the first time today,” says Daniel Johnson, “and brilliant to see England getting themselves back into this. Now have a 30-minute walk to the train station. Will they have batted themselves out of it by the time I check again?” That’s the great thing about England’s Test team: you never know whether they’ll be quite good or quite hopeless.
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2nd over: England 2-0 (Burns 1, Sibley 0) From the Nursery End it’s Jasprit Bumrah, the human catapult. He bagged Burns at Trent Bridge but the only hint of that swing back into the left-hander comes with a delivery that pitches outside leg and goes for a leg-bye. Dom Sibley, facing his first ball, plays and misses outside off, or possibly pulls off a wily leave.
1st over: England 1-0 (Burns 1, Sibley 0) Virat Kohli tends to favour experience over youth, and Anderson’s masterclass won’t have changed his mind. He hands the new ball to Ishant Sharma. Hair flopping and flying, he jags one away from Rory Burns and finds the edge – but Rohit, at second slip, takes it on the half-volley. Burns dabs into the leg side to get England off the mark.
The players are out there, and so is the sun.
In his 164th Test, Jimmy Anderson leads the England team off with figures of 29-7-62-5. The old master.
“Laughter before wicket,” says Anirvan Dasgupta. “Ha! And ha once more to the chap who came out with Boycott in his cap and ‘that’ mode of dismissal, even if it’s a nod to ol’ Neville [Cardus, I presume]. I don’t believe anyone but Patsy Hendren could be given out laughter before wicket. Period.” Suddenly all those references to Mike Brearley are beginning to look rather new-fangled.
“A sultry afternoon in Calcutta, India. And what’s worse, I’m copy-editing for the regional page. Not everybody can have Tim’s job...” Fair point! We OBOers know how lucky we are to be here. Mind you, I’ve done my share of copy-editing too. Who do you think started out writing the picture captions for The Official Sloane Ranger Handbook?
India 364 all out! (Jadeja c Anderson b Wood 40)
After batting with three rabbits, Jadeja gives up and has a slog at Wood, offering a simple catch to Anderson. So England have taken seven wickets today, for only 88 runs. It’s been a case of very well bowled, very well captained, and not very well fielded, but they’ve got there in the end. Now they just have to bat a lot better than they did in the first innings at Trent Bridge.
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126th over: India 364-9 (Jadeja 40, Siraj 0) That was actually the third chance of the over. First Rory Burns dropped Jadeja at gully. It went fast, off the face as Jadeja played a cut, but it was catchable. Then Sam Curran, in the covers, joined the not very exclusive club of England fielders who would have a dismissal if they had managed a direct hit.
Wicket! Bumrah c Buttler b Anderson 0 (India 364-9)
Anderson turns Bumrah round with some outswing and grabs yet another five-for! Imagine what he might do if he was fully fit.
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125th over: India 363-8 (Jadeja 39, Bumrah 0) Robinson continues, Jadeja takes his customary single and Bumrah gets through two balls. At Trent Bridge he lifted his Test career batting average from 2 to 3, so anything could happen here.
124th over: India 362-8 (Jadeja 38, Bumrah 0) So that’s another successful bowling change from Root, who took Wood off after only one over. Much more of this and we Rootosceptics will have to change our opinion.
“Yes, Hameed does need more coaching in throwing,” says John Starbuck, “but he’s usually been a close-in fielder, in either the slips or at short leg. Whoever gets the job should teach him to throw from different distances but concentrate first on the forward and backward flicks for instant run-outs, which is the most likely way to benefit the team.”
Wicket! Ishant LBW b Anderson 8 (India 362-8)
Pinned in front! As predicted by Atherton, the sage of St Albans. Ishant reviews but it’s Michael Gough, so he needn’t have bothered.
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123rd over: India 361-7 (Jadeja 37, Ishant 8) Yet another run-out chance, and it’s Hameed again! This time he hits, and the umps refer it, but Hameed is shaking his head. And another! To Bairstow this time – would have been out if he’d hit... Ishant’s running is shambolic – he doesn’t even run his bat in – and England’s fielding is matching it.
“Brearley was a genius,” says Jeremy Boyce. “I still read his great book, The Art Of Captaincy, one of the best management training manuals ever. He would bring Boycott on to bowl in his cap and have someone out Laughter Before Wicket. Then get Willis/Wood back on.”
122nd over: India 355-7 (Jadeja 32, Ishant 8) One whole over at Ishant, and two chances! Back comes Wood, digging it in with a short leg and a leg slip. Ishant plays the leg glance regardless and Buttler, at full stretch, puts him down, no blame attached. Then there’s another run-out chance, to Hameed again – out, by miles, if he’d hit. Ishant celebrates these escapes by stepping away to leg and slicing over point for four. These two have added only 19 off 11 overs, but they may be about to find third gear.
121st over: India 351-7 (Jadeja 32, Ishant 4) Jadeja tries to smash Robinson but succeeds only in mis-hitting to mid-on, where Anderson, 39 years young, makes a good diving stop. The cameras go celeb-hunting and come up with two theatrical knights for the price of one – Sir Tim Rice and Sir David Hare. They probably don’t agree about anything, except the need to attack Jadeja as well as Ishant.
120th over: India 351-7 (Jadeja 32, Ishant 4) Anderson to Jadeja, who is circumspect one minute, kamikaze the next – going down the track, then blocking when he finds the ball not quite there for the big hit. He gets his single eventually, flicking through a surprisingly vacant square leg, and leaving Ishant just the one ball to see off.
“Greetings from New Jersey, where it topped 38 centigrade yesterday!” says John Sims. “The problem for Root is that he has to ask what would Brearley, or Vaughan, or Morgan, or Jardine do... is it fair to say he’s not a natural captain and creativity is not his strong point? I lived in Yorkshire for many years, and there are some very creative people, and also many who cleave to ‘the old ways’, including a fair few associated with the cricket club at Headingley.” Yes, it is fair to say that he’s not a natural captain.
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119th over: India 350-7 (Jadeja 31, Ishant 4) Ishant, as Mike Atherton observes, is shuffling across his stumps, just asking to be LBW. The best bowler to nab him might be Sam Curran with his waspish yorkers, but for now it’s Robinson, who doesn’t direct so many deliveries at the stumps. Ishant squirts him away for two.
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118th over: India 348-7 (Jadeja 31, Ishant 2) Root deploys Anderson as well as Robinson, a compliment to these two batters. Ishant steals another single. Jadeja doesn’t, so Robinson will get another crack at Ishant.
“What would X do?” muses Pete Salmon, picking up the loose thread from the 114th over. “Not sure if this will be helpful to anyone, but for years I’ve found it useful to ask the question ‘What would Ernest Hemingway do?’ and then do the opposite.” I like it.
117th over: India 347-7 (Jadeja 31, Ishant 1) And the bowler offered the chance to bowl a whole over at Ishant Sharma is ... Ollie Robinson. He duly draws an edge, but it’s well kept down (and well stopped by Rory Burns, diving to his left at gully). Then Ishant tries a spot of tip-and-run into the covers, where Haseeb swoops and would have a run-out if he’d managed a direct hit.
On that note: “It’s genuinely pleasing to see Hameed back in the Test side,” says Max Bonnell. “A real good news story. But, now, can someone in England’s vast coaching staff teach him how to throw? We’ve had all sorts this morning – sidearm, underarm and big, loopy Harbour Bridge lobs. Unless he has had some kind of shoulder injury, it seems to be a simple failure of technique, which could be put right pretty quickly.”
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In other news, the schedule for England’s short tour of Pakistan has been given a tweak. All the matches are now in Rawalpindi, and there will be double-headers with the women’s T20s taking place before the men’s – international cricket taking a leaf out of The Hundred’s book. Here’s Raf Nicholson with more on how well those double-headers have gone.
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“Couldn’t agree more with Chris Evans (113th over),” says Guy Hornsby on Twitter. “How often do you see teams trying to just ignore the non-tailender and go for the rabbit, only to take a dozen more overs to bowl the side out. Surely just top of off with the odd variation. Yours, R Ponting.”
Lunch: it's England's morning
116th over: India 346-7 (Jadeja 31, Ishant 0) In flagrant defiance of my advice, and the late Joe Strummer’s, Root keeps Wood on. Jadeja wakes up, cutting for two, then hooking for four. But Wood does keep him at that end with a second, higher bouncer. And that’s lunch, with the game much better poised than it was overnight.
England have taken four wickets, in two quick bursts of two apiece from two pairs of bowlers, while India have added 70, half of them through Pant’s exuberance, the other half from Jadeja’s calculations. They’re still on top, but England’s chance of a win at CricViz has soared from 7pc to 14. See you in half an hour or so.
115th over: India 340-7 (Jadeja 25, Ishant 0) This old game of ours, so alive 15 minutes ago, has decided to have a nap before lunch. Another set of three dots from Moeen is followed by another Jadeja single and another two dots to Ishant.
114th over: India 339-7 (Jadeja 24, Ishant 0) Wood continues and so does Jadeja, taking his single off the fourth ball again. He’s well in control here.
“It’s interesting,” says Simon Thomas, “that you ask ‘what would Brearley do?’ seeing as he played his last Test 40 years ago and is nearly 80 now. Probably have a sit-down.” Ha. “You may as well ask ‘what would Douglas Jardine do?’. Wouldn’t Vaughan or Morgan be a better reference point these days? Although saying that, I often find that ‘what would Joe Strummer do in this situation?’ leads to some superlative outcomes.” Ha. Joe, I’m fairly sure, would give Jimmy an over before lunch. Morgan would bring on Adil Rashid.
113th over: India 338-7 (Jadeja 23, Ishant 0) Jadeja, facing Moeen, gets his single again, off the fourth ball, and Ishant survives the other two. Time for an over from Jimmy, surely.
“Gah!” says Chris Evans. “It annoys me so much when England do this when they get to the tail. Jadeja is decent, but he’s a number 7 with 20 runs. Don’t treat him like he’s Bradman, just keep trying to get him out. They end up wasting overs and they’re really not good at stopping the single off the last ball anyway.” Very true.
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112th over: India 337-7 (Jadeja 22, Ishant 0) Wood keeps Jadeja quiet, bothering him with a bouncer and beating him with a length ball angled across him, but he can’t stop him taking a single off the last delivery as a full wide one is deflected to the cover sweeper. Jadeja is such a wily operator. I love Moeen, his opposite number for England, but I hope he’s taking notes.
111th over: India 336-7 (Jadeja 21, Ishant 0) Before the wicket, Jadeja gave Mo the charge and slogged him for four, albeit not off the middle of the bat – so it looks as if he’s going to take over the role of Pant.
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Wicket! Mohammed Shami c Burns b Moeen 0 (India 336-7)
One brings two, again! Shami, showing just how flattered he is to be at No 8, chips tamely to midwicket. Suddenly, England have more than two people taking wickets.
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110th over: India 331-6 (Jadeja 16, Shami 0) That was a minor triumph for Root, going back to Wood when the obvious move was to summon Anderson or Robinson. And it was a major relief for Wood, who finally gets his first wicket of the game.
“Enjoying your commentary as always,” says Matthew Kentridge, “as I can neither be part of the cognoscenti at Lords (today) nor building a beer snake with the rabble (tomorrow).” Ha. “I wanted to follow up a comment in yesterday’s thread about winning the toss and putting the other side in to bat ... yes, the captains look at the pitch, and the weather and their own belief in their bowlers, but is there a statistical basis for saying that in general, the side that bats first does better, precisely because the other side is always playing catch-up? It’s the same with tennis – I don’t understand why the player who wins the toss doesn’t always opt to serve first. If you can hold your serve, your opponent will be under pressure throughout the set. Thoughts from you and the OBO brigade much welcomed.”
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Wicket!! PANT c Buttler b Wood 37 (India 331-6)
Root goes back to Wood, who does the business! It’s not a great ball, short outside off, but Pant’s eye lets him down for once as he goes for the cut and feathers an under-edge to the keeper. At the start of play, England would probably have given him 37.
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109th over: India 327-5 (Pant 34, Jadeja 15) Moeen beats Jadeja outside off stump, turning the ball sharply out of the rough. Root fumbles the ball at slip and the batsmen take a bye, which is given as a run off the bat, so that would have been interesting if Root had clung on. Pant, meanwhile, is itching to hit some sixes but Mo is wise to his tricks – poacher turned gamekeeper.
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108th over: India 324-5 (Pant 32, Jadeja 14) Curran is still going, but not getting much joy: a caption says his average swing has plummeted from 1.6 degrees yesterday to 0.2 today. He’s been canny enough to keep Jadeja down his end, though: he has bowled only three balls to Pant, yielding three runs, while Jadeja has faced 21 balls from Curran and scored 11 of his 14 runs off him.
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107th over: India 319-5 (Pant 30, Jadeja 11) It’s Mo time! And he’s bowling to Pant. For Moeen, this may be as close as he gets to bowling to himself. But Pant is watchful, just taking a couple of singles.
106th over: India 316-5 (Pant 28, Jadeja 10) England could do with a maiden and Curran provides one, seizing the chance while Jadeja is on strike. “He’s bowled quite well,” reckons Dinesh Karthik, “without any luck.”
“This may not be very new,” says Anand G, “but as far as I have seen only a few athletes are pleasing and beautiful to watch in full flow as they age because of their athleticism. One is Eliud Kipchoge of course, and the only other one I know of is Jimmy Anderson.” How about Roger Federer?
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105th over: India 316-5 (Pant 28, Jadeja 10) Even when the bowling is 90mph, Pant has time to do some dance steps. He gives Wood the charge now and blasts him past mid-off’s right hand. What would Mike Brearley do here? Post a man at silly point, I suspect. Or bring on Moeen.
104th over: India 308-5 (Pant 21, Jadeja 9) Curran gives away a couple more clips to leg, but then gets his outswinger just right and lures Jadeja into a leading edge. It loops up, only to land just wide of Haseeb Hameed at backward point.
103rd over: India 303-5 (Pant 20, Jadeja 5) Just a single for Pant in another good over from Wood, who is pitching it up and settling for 89-90mph rather than 94-95. It’s a mystery why he takes so few wickets in England. And that’s drinks, with England winning the first hour of the day, but India still in charge of the match.
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102nd over: India 302-5 (Pant 19, Jadeja 5) It’s a double change as Anderson takes a well-earned break, or rather switches to the role of bowling coach, advising Sam Curran. His wisdom doesn’t do the trick as Curran dishes up a leg-stump half-volley, duly despatched by Jadeja – his second scoring shot, off his 30th delivery. Curran’s golden arm seems to have left him around the time he went to the barber’s and asked for yellow hair.
101st over: India 298-5 (Pant 19, Jadeja 1) Root makes the first bowling change of the morning, giving Robinson a rest and sending for Mark Wood – replacing the impeccable with the inflammable. Bowling to Pant, he pulls off the improbable: a maiden, mostly full-length balls which Pant either misses or thumps to short extra.
100th over: India 298-5 (Pant 19, Jadeja 1) Another maiden from Anderson to Jadeja ends with a snorter – lifting, leaving him and looking a lot faster than the 82mph that registers on the speed gun.
99th over: India 298-5 (Pant 19, Jadeja 1) Pant gives Robinson the charge and doesn’t get hold of it, but picks up two as his mow goes over mid-off. Before that over, Root had a long chat with Anderson, possibly asking him if he feels OK to bowl all morning.
“Predictably,” says Vasu Chaurey, “this has been abysmal from the Indian middle order – and another downside to playing three woefully out-of-form batsmen, apart from virtually having a passenger train for a middle order, is Ravi Ashwin’s spot being compromised to make up for the batting. How many more opportunities should these three be given to play themselves back into form? They undoubtedly have the class, but something needs to give; otherwise this team may end up being one that shines once in few tours and fails to win anything meaningful.” Are you including Kohli in that?
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98th over: India 296-5 (Pant 17, Jadeja 1) A maiden from Anderson to Jadeja. When he’s facing, this is proper Test cricket; when it’s Pant, it’s The Hundred without the DJ. The contrast is delicious.
“Morning all,” says Dean Kinsella. “I have to admit I reacted along similar lines to Alisdair Gould [10:53] when I read your preamble but luckily didn’t put finger to keypad. I suppose in all honesty, I’d better join him at his Parisian lunch table and share in his humble pie.” You and he may yet be proved right.
97th over: India 296-5 (Pant 17, Jadeja 1) How do you set a field to this man? For Robinson, Joe Root goes in-out, rightly keeping the slips in but sending a sweeper out for the hook. Pant, of course, responds by hooking, twice – both times in front of square, with such power that Moeen can’t get round from deep square to cut it off. Robinson in turn retorts by going round the wicket, which sobers Pant up.
“As you point out,” says Ed Rostron, “there’s a huge drop-off from this pair to the Indian tail. But there’s also, I think, a huge drop-off from this pair of bowlers to the rest. Pant may well be the one licking his lips at the prospect of facing Moeen...” Good point.
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96th over: India 288-5 (Pant 9, Jadeja 1) Pant has had enough of all this patience. He goes dancing down the track to Anderson again and slashes over gully for four. And then, to show that he has a shrewd brain as well as a brave heart, he dabs a single into the on side to keep the strike.
95th over: India 283-5 (Pant 4, Jadeja 1) Robinson, up to medium-fast now, probes away at Jadeja’s fourth stump. That’s another maiden, so India’s score today, from five overs, is 7 for 2.
94th over: India 283-5 (Pant 4, Jadeja 1) Pant decides he has got his eye in now and it’s time to give the charge ... to Jimmy Anderson. But he is just restrained enough not to play a shot when the ball turns out to be on the wide side. A little chastened after that, he mostly defends before playing and missing at the sixth ball.
“Splendid preamble,” says Brian Withington, “and (mischievous?) shout-out to any OBOers amongst the ‘rabble’ attending in person tomorrow! This time tomorrow will you be toasting a glorious return for him who cannot be named for fear of jinxing?” Hope so! “The OBO nation awaits expectantly. Meanwhile I couldn’t think of a decent song with ‘rabble’ in the title but will this Bowie Live Aid banger do?” It will.
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93rd over: India 283-5 (Pant 4, Jadeja 1) Robinson is still only military-medium this morning, but his bounce and nagging accuracy keep Jadeja quiet, and there’s enough nibble off the seam to induce a couple of thick inside edges. All the wickets so far have fallen to the opening pair – but, with two left-handers in, Moeen should be licking his lips.
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92nd over: India 283-5 (Pant 4, Jadeja 1) Ravi Jadeja gets off the mark with a single to midwicket off Anderson. He and Pant make a formidable pair, both left-handed, one a fighter, the other a showman. The drop-off from these two to India’s bottom four is vertiginous.
Wicket!! Rahane c Root b Anderson 1 (India 282-5)
One brings two! Anderson’s first ball is on the spot and Ajinkya Rahane a-jinks it to first slip, where Joe Root takes another neat catch. Game on!
91st over: India 282-4 (Rahane 1, Pant 4) So we have two new batsmen at the crease, and England have a sniff. But Robinson is creaking as if it was him, not Jimmy, who was 39. His speeds in this over are only 78mph, 77, 78, 78, 81 and 79, which means the delivery that did the trick was technically a slower ball. Rishabh Pant, true to his nature, gets off the mark with a four through mid-on, then plays and misses at a wide one.
“So…” says Steve Hudson, rather ominously. “The Saturday crowd are ‘rabble’ are they? I always attend the Saturday and if I see you there tomorrow I will throw my kebab at you.” Thank you for taking the remark in the spirit that was intended.
Wicket!!! RAHUL c Sibley b Robinson 129 (India 278-4)
The big one! Ollie Robinson starts with two medium-paced half-volleys to Rahul. The first is tucked away for two, the second driven straight to cover, where Dom Sibley takes a crisp low catch. Maybe Rahul had something in his eye after seeing the Strauss boys do their stuff.
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Lord's goes #redforRuth
Today’s the day when, in aid of the Ruth Strauss Foundation, everything goes red – from Sir Andrew Strauss’s suit to the England and India caps. It’s a wonderful cause, funding research into non-smoking lung cancers, and helping families who face a dreadful bereavement. Strauss and his sons Sam and Luca have just rung the bell, with plenty of gusto and proud sad smiles. If you have £20 to spare, please text TWENTY to 70600.
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“Bonjour Tim,” says Alisdair Gould in Paris. “That was an outrageously optimistic preamble. As always, written beautifully but this time complete tosh.” We do our best! “As I wrote yesterday (!) England have one world-class player in their side. I bet you the 7 per cent will be even less by the end of your session.
“PS Thank you for your work.” Pleasure! “I had no idea the price in the real world for seats was so high. I won’t be going to Lord’s in my lifetime at this rate.”
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Preamble: it could go either way
Morning everyone and welcome to the second day of the second Test. Friday at Lord’s: often the best day of the lot. The drama has some shape, the slow first act is out of the way, you usually get to see both teams bat, and the crowd is a calmer, more informed one than the rabble that turns up on a Saturday.
The snag, for any England supporters settling into their £180 seats, is that their team may well be in deep trouble. On WinViz, England’s chances of winning the match have already sunk to 7 per cent. India have as many runs as they made in the first innings at Trent Bridge, and they’ve lost only three wickets. KL Rahul has 127 and he’s so been serene that you can well imagine him getting 127 more. The stage could hardly be better set for Rishabh Pant, the world’s most explosive performer in white trousers.
On the other hand, as a man in a straw hat has told us a thousand times, you should always add two wickets to the score. And if you add three to this one, you’re down to the tail. India could get 590 for 7 declared here, or they could be all out for 350.
England have a newish ball, which will be in the hands of a new star in Ollie Robinson and a very old one whose name escapes me. In Moeen Ali and Mark Wood, they have an off-spinner to tease the left-handed Pant and a super-fast bowler to terrorise the tail. They also have Sam Curran, whose ability to Make Things Happen with the ball has deserted him so abruptly that it must be about to pop up again. And, so far, they haven’t dropped a catch.
In short, it could go either way. The forecast is good, with even less chance of rain than of an England win. Do join me at 11am UK time for the next instalment in a gripping series.
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