Queen legend Brian May has revealed his depression “engulfed” him over Christmas.
In an emotional blog, the 72-year-old said: “Most of this Christmas period I haven’t wanted to show my face because my face was grim.
There’s something about this time of the year that paralyses me. Depression, hopelessness, fear... I get engulfed. Is it logical ?
“No. Should I be grateful for my life and therefore NOT depressed? Yes. But none of that makes any difference when you look up and the colours have gone out of the world.”
The guitarist said he was “wrenching” himself back into “normality” with “biking, stretching and hot and cold showering”.
It’s not the first time the star has opened up about his mental health struggles.
He admitted previously to contemplating suicide after bandmate Freddie Mercury died in 1991.
May, who also lost his father around the same time Mercury died, said he “didn’t want to live” in the months following the deaths.
He also told how he had “severe depression” as a younger man.
May said previously: “I think the only thing I could say is, focus on that tiny light at the end of the tunnel.
“OK, this day is going to be [crap], end of story. But there will be another day which will be better. That’s the only advice which is of any use.”
The musician said at the time that problems stemmed from his childhood.
He said: “I still catch myself feeling like the shy schoolboy of many years ago. I don’t know how to start a conversation.
“It’s a complete shock to me when people treat me like someone they look up to or might be excited about meeting.
“People say, ‘Oh, you’re very humble,’ but that’s not it. It’s actually that I haven’t reprogrammed myself from those days.”
May, an animal rights campaigner, also kept followers up to date as he takes part in Veganuary.
He shared details of his meal plan as he embraces a vegan lifestyle this month.
May, who is married to ex-EastEnders actress Anita Dobson, said he wanted to “lessen the load on our groaning planet” as well as hoping to improve his health.
He wrote: “As an animal campaigner, it has been bothering me for a while that I still eat animal-derived food, that has caused indignity and pain to a non-human animal.
“So I will try to move along the line.
“I won’t be pressuring anyone else to do the same, and it won’t change my commitment to helping farmers solve the problem of bovine TB.
“But for me it’s time.”
