Emmerdale star Lisa Riley spoke openly to Lorraine Kelly about how her grief over her mum's death is "as worse today" as it was nine years ago when she passed away.
The actress - best known for playing Mandy Dingle in the ITV soap Emmerdale - said she experiences a daily ‘uphill struggle’ of being judged by others for still grieving.
Lisa was live on ITV's Lorraine on Monday morning (October 11) to talk about her new podcast Grief Kind.
READ MORE: Emmerdale Chas Dingle actress Lucy Pargeter's life off screen
Speaking from her home in Yorkshire, Lisa said: “It was a case of just getting my story out there because I’ve spoken so openly before about grief and how it affects different people
“I wanted to be unbelievably honest and really tell the truth about what I go through daily and the uphill struggle I have, massively, with being judged.”
“I have it on set in Emmerdale when I’m at work, when everyone knows me of having this fun, happy personality, which is me. But the days I’m down… I feel like I’m being judged.
“It’s [the grief] as worse today as it was initially when mum passed 9 years ago in July.”
When asked what her mum was like, Lisa described her as a ‘catherine wheel’ and said she had a ‘sparkling energy’.
When a photograph of her mum came up on the screen the star got emotional, saying she looked 'skeletal'.
She revealed how her mum came out of care, especially for her birthday, just a couple of weeks before she died.
“She was so ill,” she revealed, while fighting back the tears. “But she did it and she was there so that forever, I can remember that for my birthday she made that effort.
“What a legacy to leave, this happy smile and this lady who never gave up fighting.”
Speaking to Lorraine about the podcast, she said: “When Sue Ryder offered me the opportunity to be part of this podcast I jumped at it.
“It [the podcast] makes you feel like you’re not on your own and you’re not feeling lonely about it.
“I’m really proud to be involved.”
Actress Lisa also spoke of her role in Emmerdale, as the much-loved character Mandy Dingle, and revealed how she ‘loves’ going to work.
Lisa said she’s ‘part of the woodwork’ and the ‘writers write brilliantly’ for her.
“It’s never ever boring in Mandy land.” she laughed.
She also revealed how today (October 11) is the first day the full hair and makeup crew will return to the set of the ITV soap since the start of the pandemic.
On having to do her own hair and makeup, Lisa said: “Today I can have my lashes put on, thank goodness!
“I’m proud of the whole team, what we’ve gone through. We just cracked on and we did it. The programme never came off air and that’s brilliant for the show.”
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