My grandmother, Eileen Tottenham, who has died aged 90, was a nursery nurse in the 1940s and 50s. A single mother, she struggled to bring up her daughter, Cherry, and work at the same time.
However, she really came into her own as a grandmother, instilling a love of travel, the outdoors and animals in her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.
She was born in Coveney, Cambridgeshire, one of the seven children of Dorothy and Charles Tottenham. Her father was a church rector and an entomologist whose collection of beetles is now in the Natural History Museum. Her career options were limited but she trained to be a nursery nurse and worked at Hackney hospital, east London, and Queen Mary’s hospital, in Carshalton, Surrey.
After giving birth to Cherry, she found it hard combining motherhood with her career. She moved around in her attempt to make ends meet, and if her work involved “living in”, Cherry would be cared for by Eileen’s brother, Hugh, and his wife in Highgate, north London. Eileen and Cherry eventually settled in Brighton, East Sussex, in 1952.
When Cherry had children of her own, Eileen refused to be called Grandma, saying that it made her feel too old, and insisted on “Totty”. During trips to Goa, Russia, the US, the Gambia and Tunisia, she showed me and my brother, Paul, what it was to travel. She taught us to respect local people, study the wildlife and explore away from the beaten track.
She was encouraging, but never pushy. Along with her sister, Margot, she showed us to our capital city, taking us on trips to the Cutty Sark, Greenwich, St Paul’s, Waterloo, the Natural History Museum and the Barbican. She also introduced us to dogs via the gorgeous Betty, who we would all take on walks around Chatsworth in Derbyshire.
More than anything she had a huge, unwavering belief in her grandchildren.
She is survived by Cherry, Paul and me, and two great-grandchildren, Leo and Finn.
