A drink driver caught with a bottle of gin in the passenger seat was more than four times the limit.
Gary Porteous giggled when police stopped him, telling officers: "I'm mortal."
Despite the high reading being well above the custody threshold, he has been spared jail.
Police spotted the 45-year-old swerving on the A182 near Washington in the middle of the afternoon.
"The officer noticed this Audi in front of him driving extremely erratically," said prosecutor Paul Anderson.
"Sometimes it dropped down to 40mph then sometimes it does speed up beyond the speed limit."
The Low Fell man then took a roundabout badly and clipped a kerb before he was stopped.
South Tyneside Magistrates' Court heard Porteous was "struggling to get his seatbelt off" after he was stopped.
Describing the scene, Mr Anderson added: "There was a bottle of gin in the passenger seat.
"He smiled, laughed and said 'I'm f****** pissed.
"Several times he said 'I'm minging - I've had a canny drink like."
A breath test produced a reading of 151 microgrammes of alcohol in 100ml of breath. The limit is just 35mcg.
On Tuesday, "deeply ashamed" Porteous pleaded guilty to drink driving.
A former senior manager at Washington Metal Works, he suffered a breakdown after losing his job of 20 years.
In mitigation, it was claimed "everything had unravelled" in his life while battling a drink problem.
On the day of the arrest, he had been to see an old friend. Following a row he turned to alcohol.
When he was arrested on November 17, it was only 1.45pm.
Court heard Porteous, of Blue Bell Close, Low Fell, had planned on pulling over when he was forced to by police.
At the scene, he blew a reading which exceeded 120mcg, which the court heard would usually mean jail.
However, his 17 week jail sentence was suspended for 18 months.
He was banned from driving for three years.
