Five possible reasons why they've dropped the 'Fast And" from Furious 7
The poster for the film Furious 7 has dropped (they only ‘drop’ nowadays, they’re never ‘released as promotional materials’)
You’ll note they’ve dropped the Fast And bit....
1/ Because they’ve given up racing cars?
This would seem unlikely. Although the main poster does show the seven leads standing without cars, so you can’t rule it out.
2/ Because, thanks to a sponsorship by G Wiz, they’re only driving electric cars with a limiting top speed of 50mph?
No.
3/ Because it’s a snappier phrase for having tattooed Maori-style on your bicep?
Still too long for most people’s biceps.
4/ Because the cast have been on the Paleo diet throughout filming and, as a result, are actually furious?
This one has legs.
5/ Because this is the seventh film in a franchise and needed something, anything to distinguish it?
Could be mate, could be.
Interstellar, the reviews are in: cosmic glory or random space junk?
After being detained in a cage for 40 days and forced to dine on nothing but wormhole theory. today movie critics were released worldwide and allowed to watch Interstellar.
A new Christopher Nolan film is never without fevered anticipation and not just by those who will be forever grateful that he allowed them to pretend superhero movies had gravitas. Anyway, the reviews for this new space opera in which Matthew McConnaughey must find a new home for mankind on the other side of space and time are in. And they’re very much mixed...
Variety gives the film what you might call the classic ‘rave’:
“Interstellar” reaffirms Nolan as the premier big-canvas storyteller of his generation, more than earning its place alongside “The Wizard of Oz,” “2001,” “Close Encounters of the Third Kind” and “Gravity” in the canon of Hollywood’s visionary sci-fi head trips.
The film feels less like a grand original work than it does a buttoned-down and overly “realistic” variation on “go into space to save the world” pictures such as (among others) The Core, Sunshine, and even yes Lost in Space.
Promising outer-space majesty and deep-thought topics like some modern variation on Stanley Kubrick’s “2001: A Space Odyssey,” “Interstellar” instead plays like a confused mix of daringly unique space-travel footage like you’ve never seen and droningly familiar emotional and plot beats that you’ve seen all too many times before
The Telegraph thinks the drama does work and the ideas are there:
It’s [past the hour mark] that the film’s ambitions flower and gather, and sequences of exhilarating beauty, then cuticle-shredding tension, and finally dizzying conceptual boldness bring its themes crashing together.
While our very own Henry Barnes, finds the whole thing a little bit robotic:
The actors – even those of the calibre of McConaughey and Hathaway - are script-delivering modules, there to output exposition and process emotional data. The best lines, those that seem truly spontaneous and responsive, go to TARS, the crew’s AI assistant. In this world human beings are outdated software, bad code to be over-written.
New music Monday y'all, that's right, new music Monday
John Cale - If You Were Still Around
It’s a tribute from one member of the Velvet Undergound to another, but as you might expect it ain’t I’ll Be Missing You. To a weird and persistently permutating backdrop Cale acts out a cannibalistic ode to his former bandmate Lou Reed then howls silently into the void.
Rick Ross - Keep Doin’ That
Taking my cue from Jay Rayner’s recent review of a repellent restaurant, I’d say the best thing to do with this song is laugh at it. Such is the base level of reductive sexism and money worship, it’s kinda easy to do too, what with all the ridiculous furs, band shaking and lyrics about panties being passed between family members. It’s sad a half decent piano hook and R Kelly’s honeyed vocals have to ruin the experience by making the song just a little bit good. Damn.
Fryars - The Boy in the Hood mixtape
Returning London wunderkind who never quite went anywhere, Fryars shows off his range on this mixtape. There’s all kind of piano balladeering there’s A$AP pitched down hip hop noodling, some Lily Allen and even a little bit of glitchy bashment. Interesting.
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Five things you didn't know about *that* Dads Army picture
1/ Captain Mainwaring is to be played by Toby Jones. This is not Toby Jones, but when it comes time for the film, he will be there.
2/ “You stupid boy!” is what Mainwaring used to shout at Private Pike. Actor Blake Harrison, who is playing Pike, also used to have that phrase shouted at him by the nuns at his convent school. He’s heard it so often that you can shout “you stupid boy” a mile away and Harrison will still turn round.
3/ Real grass will be used in this film. This is not real grass, but when it comes time for the film, it will be there.
4/ Nobody told Bill Patterson that as well as playing undertaker Frazer in Dads Army he would also be used as the measure for judging the height of all the film’s hedges.
5/ Nobody told Michael Gambon anything. Not a damned thing.
The cast (left to right): Frank Pike (Blake Harrison), Walker (Daniel Mays), Jones (Tom Courtenay), George Mainwaring (Toby Jones), Arthur Wilson (Bill Nighy), Frazer (Bill Paterson), Godfrey (Michael Gambon).
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Cool new follow on Twitter you guys!
The Guide: all about the ex-Labour cabinet minister vibe
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New Drake - but which Drake?
Apparently to beat ‘the hackers’ to it, Drake has dropped three new tracks from his upcoming album. None of them are going to revolutionise the way you see Aubrey Graham, which is probably not so much of a problem for him given that millions upon millions love him as he is.
But which new Drake is the best new Drake? Here’s our quick guide.
Drake - Heat of the Moment
The one to listen to if...
You want to hear Drake sing rap about the kids today “they don’t read any more/they don’t even read any more/They just wanna be like the rappers I can’t stand”
You want to hear another rambling voicemail from his dad.
Drake - How Bout Now
The one to listen to if...
You want a narky voicemail from Nicki Minaj talking about how “you cheese me dog”
A moan about how people didn’t give Drake respect back in the day and now they do but it’s too late mate. And he used to go to church btw.
Drake - 6 God
The one to listen to if....
You want to listen to Drake boast about how great he is and how all the girls love him in a way that’s entirely convincing.
You want a trap rhythm that’s been smash cut together into something adrenalizing.
IE you want to listen to this one.
World's creepiest game of Hide n Seek set to return
The Fall is set to return to our screens within the month (look out for our behind the scenes report coming even sooner!).
As many will already know - The Fall being BBC2’s biggest new drama in a decade - the story follows the exploits of happy go lucky serial killer Paul Spector (Jamie Dornan) as he keeps on flirting with being caught by DS Stella Gibson (Gillian Anderson).
He hasn’t been caught yet, as that might have mitigated against a second series which, this is the trailer of. But watch it and ask yourself the following questions:
Why has Spector become a fisherman?
Is it coincidence that the pair are both caught looking into mirrors?
And are you ready to embrace the darkness?*
*probably not, I imagine. You’ve got a day job.
This week's annotated chaaaaaarrrrtsss!
Even though the combined total of sales is probably someway south of 25 copies, what better way to begin your week than by plugging yourself in to the raw data of popular music. IE THE POP CHARTS. And here’s the top five singles and albums with a few extra clarificatory remarks.
