Full-time: Dover 0-4 Crystal Palace
Well, that was a potentially tricky job very well done by Palace. Even considering the obvious disparity in quality between the two sides, Dover should probably be disappointed not to give them a slightly sterner tests. Still, their performances in the cup to this point have been much more impressive, so nothing to be embarrassed about.
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Dover 0-4 Palace
90 mins + 2: Lovely save from Rafferty, who by necessity has been Dover’s best player. Thomas clips over a cross from the left, it’s nodded back into the middle for Doyle to head towards goal, but the Dover keeper dives to his left and pushes the ball away.
Dover 0-4 Palace
90 mins: Zaha produces a delightful flick to get around a couple of defenders, but one of them (Sterling), grapples him to the floor. Bannan tries a shot from the free-kick that drifts well over the bar. Three minutes added time.
Dover 0-4 Palace
87 mins: Lovely football that from Palace, orchestrated by Bannan, who knocks the ball around between a few players, eventually finding Thomas on the left side of the box who aims for the byline, crosses low into the middle and Doyle is there to force home.
GOAL! Dover 0-4 Palace (Doyle 87)
Another one.
Dover 0-3 Palace
86 mins: Kelly tries a cross from the left which looks decent, but oddly Zaha at the far post doesn’t make a massive effort to get on the end of it.
Dover 0-3 Palace
84 mins: The dreadlocked Modeste, who by the reaction from the crowd seems like something of a ‘cult hero’, attempts a run and cross from the left, but again Hennessey (as much to keep himself warm as anything else) comes out and catches the thing.
Dover 0-3 Palace
82 mins: Final sub for Dover - Tom Murphy is off, and the splendidly-named Ricky Modeste is on.
Dover 0-3 Palace
81 mins: Zaha skips past Sterling and goes to ground, claiming a penalty, but nothing is given. There was a tiny bit of contact, but not much - there’s not much dignity in going down easily at the best of times, but against a Conference side you’re beating 3-0 with nine minutes left...
Dover 0-3 Palace
79 mins: Clean shorts for Hennessey today - once again the extent of his involvement in the game is to meander off his line to catch a fairly limp Cogan corner.
Dover 0-3 Palace
78 mins: WOOF. Zaha tries to run at the Dover defence, but is stopped in no uncertain terms by Wynter, who belts the ball with some gusto out of play.
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Dover 0-3 Palace
75 mins: Cogan has a rare chance for a Dover attack, but his free-kick from the left hits the first man. Zaha counters, slips it inside to Bannan, who looks for a pass back but Wynter intercepts and puts it behind for a corner. Meanwhile, Adrian Mariappa comes on for Ledley.
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Dover 0-3 Palace
73 mins: Sub for Palace - Jerome Thomas replaces Gayle.
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Dover 0-3 Palace
71 mins: Perhaps not surprising that Dover are falling apart a little here, given the disparity in fitness and so forth, but even considering who they’re playing, they will probably be disappointed with their performance. They haven’t had a single shot so far, and aside from a few spells of decent pressing have made it far too easy for Palace.
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Dover 0-3 Palace
70 mins: Change for Dover - Bellamy is off, and Tom Wynter is on.
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Dover 0-3 Palace
68 mins: That would seem to be that. Palace take advantage of that large amount of space in midfield by bringing it forward unchallenged, Gayle gets the ball on the left side of the box, does a little step-over then fires a shot low into the net at the near-post.
GOAL! Dover 0-3 Palace (Gayle 68)
And they take advantage.
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Dover 0-2 Palace
67 mins: Big spaces opening up in the Dover midfield now...
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Dover 0-2 Palace
65 mins: Bit of a scramble in the Dover area, with Gayle and Doyle attempting a couple of scrappy efforts that are eventually cleared. Amid all of that, Gayle seemed to be tripped by Bonner, but no penalty is given.
Dover 0-2 Palace
62 mins: Ach, dreadful from O’Keefe there. Zaha runs at the Dover defence, elects to square to O’Keefe in space, with a clear run at goal, but he leans back and it goes way over.
Dover 0-2 Palace
61 mins: Hmmm, quite how Bannan hasn’t at least been booked is something of a mystery, as after being dispossessed by Bellamy he firstly has a little stamp on his heel then tries to kick out, but doesn’t connect. Lucky boy.
Dover 0-2 Palace
60 mins: Another Palace player tries to shoot from miles out, this time Doyle who turns his nose up at options left and right to swing his boot rather lazily, but his effort is easily blocked.
Dover 0-2 Palace
58 mins: Change for Dover - Raggett comes off, and is replaced by the Italian Christian Nanetti.
Dover 0-2 Palace
57 mins: Kelly, seemingly under the impression that he’s Neymar, tries a curling shot from way outside the box, and it goes...well, very high and wide.
Dover 0-2 Palace
56 mins: More grand defending and keeping through a combination of Raggett and Rafferty, combining to not just keep out O’Keefe as the ball breaks loose in the area, but win a goal-kick too.
Dover 0-2 Palace
54 mins: Smashing defending from Tyrone Sterling there, holding off Zaha as he scampered down the right, trying to collect a pass down the channel.
Dover 0-2 Palace
52 mins: Scott Dann, on a hat-trick, which is up there with the more surreal sentences ever to appear in the Guardian, nearly bags the matchball after getting his head to a corner from the right, but it’s not an especially powerful header and Rafferty claims.
Dover 0-2 Palace
49 mins: Not much has happened in the second half so far, as you may have guessed. In one of the other games, Sheffield United are now 2-0 up over QPR. Gosh!
Dover 0-2 Palace
47 mins: Might just post Kirsty MacColl songs for the rest of the second half. Here’s a football(ish)-themed one: England 2 Columbia 0...
Dover 0-2 Palace
46 mins: We’re away. Sounded like they were playing Kirsty MacColl’s version of ‘Days’ over the PA just before they started again. Excellent, well played Dover.
And we’re back out for the second half. A change for Palace, with Glenn Murray - who of course had some treatment for what looked like a twisted ankle in the closing stages of the opening 45 - replaced by Kevin Doyle.
It’s been said that Alan Pardew has never met a camera he didn’t like, but on the way off after the first half he pushed one away trying to film him. Banter, or has Pards gone shy?
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Half-time: Dover 0-2 Palace
And that’s the break. Palace rather comfortably ahead, with Scott Dann heading both goals home. You get the feeling that they could’ve had at least a few more were they really in the mood, but they’ve played with confidence and are easily the better side. They should have a few more, really.
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Dover 0-2 Palace
45 mins: First booking of the day, and it’s deserves as Essam catches Ledley upon the shin, going slightly over the ball there too. Could’ve been most nasty.
Dover 0-2 Palace
44 mins: Gayle shoots from the left side of the box, but it goes...well, very over. Disappointingly haven’t see a ball actually go out of the ground yet, unless I’ve missed one.
Dover 0-2 Palace
42 mins: ...which, erm, he, well, doesn’t.
Dover 0-2 Palace
41 mins: Spot of wrasslin’ in the midfield as Joe Ledley grapples his man to the turf. Cogan has a chance to deliver...
Dover 0-2 Palace
39 mins: Ooof. Kelly perhaps lucky not to see yellow after flying into a challenge on Essam, which luckily for all parties he didn’t fully connect with.
Dover 0-2 Palace
37 mins: Quick update from elsewhere: Sheffield United have just gone 1-0 up over QPR, and Sunderland have taken the lead against LeedsLeedsLeeds. Follow all t’other scores here.
Dover 0-2 Palace
35 mins: Palace nearly go three-up straight away, as O’Keefe has a shot deflected by Deverdics that Rafferty does well to get down at the near post and push it away.
Dover 0-2 Palace
Simple stuff really. A corner comes over from the right, Dann rises like a well-baked loaf of bread, unmarked in the middle and nods the thing back from whence it came and into the bottom corner.
GOAL! Dover 0-2 Palace (Dann 34)
A double for Dann.
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Dover 0-1 Palace
33 mins: Robbie Savage is awfully keen to remind us that he used to be a footballer. So far he’s played with at least three members of the Palace side. One of them, Bannan, wins a corner.
Dover 0-1 Palace
31 mins: Murray is on the turf, having gone down with what looks like a twisted ankle. Treatment is being administered.
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Dover 0-1 Palace
30 mins: Wee bit of uncertainty in the Palace backline, as Bellamy charges down a slightly dithering clearance from Martin Kelly. Meanwhile, you can take another shot in the FA Cup Cliché drinking game - we’ve just been treated to a shot of some enterprising souls watching the game from atop a nearby tree.
— Football Clichés (@FootballCliches) January 4, 2015
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Dover 0-1 Palace
28 mins: One of the Dover players drives a van, apparently.
"Some of these people have other jobs, Robbie! Jobs! That don't involve football! Can you even imagine?"
— Andrew Thomas (@andi_thomas) January 4, 2015
Dover 0-1 Palace
26 mins: Oh lord. Now Clem is talking to Chris Kinnear on the touchline. LEAVE HIM BE, CLEM. TAKE YOUR MATEY BANTER ELSEWHERE TO SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T HAVE A JOB TO DO.
Dover 0-1 Palace
25 mins: Another claim for a penner, as Delaney blocks a cross from the right with his hands in the air like he just don’t care, but the ball actually hit him nearer the face than limbs.
Dover 0-1 Palace
24 mins: BETTER as Andy Townsend might say, as Liam Bellamy looks to create something on the right and clips over a cross, but it’s headed away.
Dover 0-1 Palace
22 mins: Half-hearted claims for a penalty, mostly from the home fans, as Cogan goes to ground in the box, but no dice from ref ‘Dr’ (An)Dre Marriner.
Dover 0-1 Palace
20 mins: Dover are a bit too tentative and deep here. Nicky Devadics gets the ball, initially in a bit of space about 30 yards out, but no teammates come to help and he’s quickly crowded out. It’s perhaps understandable, but Dover look like a team afraid to get a pasting rather than one trying to win.
Dover 0-1 Palace
18 mins: Dover eventually get the ball back and try to launch an attack, in the most literal sense of the word, hoofing the thing forwards towards Stefan Payne, but Damian Delaney rather casually deals with the attempted pass.
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Dover 0-1 Palace
17 mins: Palace have basically kept the ball for about two straight minutes now. Textbook stuff from the big boys.
Dover 0-1 Palace
14 mins: O’Keefe tries to slide in Zaha, who has now switched over to the right, presumably just for yucks, but the pass is cut-out by an attentive defender.
Dover 0-1 Palace
13 mins: Palace are playing this one exactly as a Premier League side playing a Conference one should - confidently, imposing themselves, making it very clear that they’re simply better, and the early goal will obviously help that.
Dover 0-1 Palace
10 mins: Well, this could actually get quite ugly. It sounds a bit odd to say it’s surprising that a goal has taken this long with only ten minutes gone, but it is. Zaha is giving Essam twisted blood on the Palace left, which he does and whelps over a cross from the left, which is flicked on by someone or other and Dann is there at the back stick to power the header home.
GOAL! Dover 0-1 Crystal Palace (Dann 10)
And it had been coming.
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Dover 0-0 Palace
8 mins: Palace go close a couple of times through Murray. The first from a snap shot in the area that Rafferty half-saves but can’t grab into, the second after the ball is fed out wide and crossed back into the box, that Murray glances a header towards the corner of the net but Rafferty again palms the thing around the post.
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Dover 0-0 Palace
7 mins: As an aside, this FA Cup ball is horrible. A weird salmon pink colour with blue bits, which in the sunshine especially is almost impossible to see.
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Dover 0-0 Palace
6 mins: The New Power Revolution at the Crabble...
This is what it sounds like... pic.twitter.com/KEn8Ypln0v
— Tom Evans (@TomEvansEcho) January 4, 2015
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Dover 0-0 Palace
4 mins: And Palace attack instantly, Hennessey finding Stuart O’Keefe out on the left. He feeds inside to Barry Bannan, but the Scot’s shot with Zaha lurking in a better position is poor, and is easily saved by Rafferty.
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Dover 0-0 Palace
3 mins: First chance of an attack for Dover, as they win a free-kick out on the left. Barry Cogan swings it over from deep near the touchline, but Wayne Hennessey advances confidently to claim.
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Dover 0-0 Palace
1 mins: We’re off, and a chance straight away. Wilf Zaha makes tracks down the left, bamboozles a defender and clips over a cross which is met by Glenn Murray at the back stick. Andy Rafferty makes a decent save, pushing the ball away from goal, and defender Sean Raggett completes the clearance by hoofing the thing away.
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“Throw the form book out the window,” spouts ‘Fletch’, so if you’re playing some sort of ruinous drinking game, down it.
The teams are out, and Pards is waving to the Palace fans. He looks happy. That’s nice.
One of the relatively recent FA Cup clichés is that camera they have in the corner of the dressing room, which apparently aren’t allowed in the Premier League and so forth. Perhaps because they occasionally catch players nude, which I think happened a few years ago when a non-League side found out their draw for the next round. Anyone remember who that was?
Poor Chris Kinnear is having to talk to Clem. Or, perhaps more accurately, is having his personal space invaded by a bald man with a microphone and questionable facial hair.
Everyone’s at the match. Even Papua New Guinea’s finest Ashes-winning wicket-keeper batsman...
Getting busy here at @DoverAthletic pic.twitter.com/TckQCcTVUF
— Geraint Jones (@Gojones623) January 4, 2015
Here is that FA Cup semi-final from 1990, with Pardew’s goals and plenty more. What a game that was.
Well would you look at that...
Amazing day in Dover pic.twitter.com/xEJDbrLJzQ
— Barney Ronay (@barneyronay) January 4, 2015
Team news
Dover Athletic
Rafferty, Raggett, Orlu, Bellamy, Murphy, Cogan, Payne, Sterling, Deverdics, Bonner, Essam. Subs: Wynter, Francis, Reid, Nanetti, Hook, Lock, Modeste.
Crystal Palace
Hennessey, Ward, Dann, Delaney, Kelly, Bannan, Ledley, O’Keefe, Zaha, Gayle, Murray. Subs: Kettings, Mariappa, Hangeland, Guedioura, Thomas, Puncheon, Doyle.
Referee: Andre Marriner (Sheldon, West Midlands)
So, Pards. Pardy Pard Pards. He’s back, baby, back at the club he served with distinction/was a minor punchline at before scoring one of the most important goals in their history, which as you’ll recall was in the FA Cup. It’s perhaps appropriate therefore that his first proper game in charge is in that competition, although back then he found the net against Liverpool, at that point the finest club in the land, whereas now he faces Dover who, with all due etc and so on, are not.
Of course, the biggest moment of that year for our Alan was his contribution to the Palace squad’s Cup Final song that year, the players’ version of The Dave Clark Five’s up-tempo toe-tapper ‘Glad All Over’. Whereas the likes of Richard Shaw and John Salako rather endearingly ‘go for it’, Pardew looks a little like someone’s older brother asked to chaperone them to an end of school party. He’s there, and he’s actually quite enjoying himself, but he doesn’t want to show it, wants to remain cool and aloof in case anyone’s older sister shows up. Of course, he is hampered rather by being sat down, whereas the lads at the back have the freedom of movement that comes with standing, but he doesn’t help himself with the crossed-legs, the pout, the detached air.
Fripperies all this may be, but there is something extra added to a managerial appointment when they have an emotional connection to the club, even if he isn’t exactly a candidate to have a statue outside Selhurst Park. “I think the fans remember that era I was in, they admired the spirit and they’d probably like to see a bit more of that,” said Pardew before this one. “Hopefully I can bring that back. It’s been a while since I played here but it’s somewhere I know well and it’s close to my heart. It was difficult because I’m leaving a big club in Newcastle [but] really and truly, my home is in this area and for me it’s what you would class – as close as you can as a manager – as your own club.” Sod sense, sometimes sentiment trumps all in football.
What of Dover, though? I confess I have little idea of what position they are in the league, and I’m not going to look it up because it doesn’t really matter. Is there any point in studying their form, an application of footballing logic when such logic states that a Premier League club, no matter where they are in the table, should tear one from the Conference several new ones? We all rather hope for an upset here (sorry Palace fans), and looking at Dover’s win/loss record against the likes of Forest Green and Halifax isn’t going to tell us anything useful.
What’s perhaps quite encouraging is that Chris Kinnear, knowing that form and sense and logic and sensible game plans are folly in situations like this, seems to have the right idea. “We’ll try to attack them and score some goals but if they make us defend, then we’ll try to defend well,” he told Jacob Steinberg this week. “It’s not defensive just because you defend, is it? People seem to think defending is a dirty word but it’s not, it’s part of the game. It’s not a cop-out.”
Not a cop-out indeed. It’s sunny on the south coast, and we’re very much looking forward to this one.
Kick-off: 1pm.
Nick will be here shortly before the 1pm kick-off. In the meantime, here’s Jacob Steinberg’s interview with Dover manager Chris Kinnear:
Chris Kinnear has been trying to build an extension on his house for longer than he cares to remember, but the countless hours he spends managing Dover Athletic and teaching PE in a school in east London have made the job impossible. “I just can’t get it finished because I can’t spend time on it,” he says. “We’ve got it up, but we just can’t finish it.”
It sounds like Kinnear is making excuses; surely he must have a few spare hours given that schools are on holiday? “Yeah, but when I’m on holiday I’m doing something with football,” he says. “I can’t get it finished.”
Kinnear is not complaining. He loves both of his jobs, no matter how much they demand. This is a man who would probably find a way to keep his feet on the ground in a world without gravity, and the daunting prospect of hosting Crystal Palace at The Crabble on Sunday has not distracted Kinnear from the bread and butter of Dover’s league commitments.
This is not the first time he has faced high-calibre opposition in the FA Cup. “When I was manager at Margate we played against Fulham when Kevin Keegan and Ray Wilkins were in charge there and they had Mohamed Al Fayed,” he says. “We were invited up to Harrods. Actually, my son’s still got the bucket and spade that Fayed gave him for that game. My daughter’s still got the teddy bear he gave her. It was over Christmas time and he just invited us up there.”
So Kinnear is not too bothered about the upheaval at Selhurst Park that has seen Alan Pardew replace Neil Warnock as manager. Pardew will take charge of Palace for the first time on Sunday. “We can’t affect that,” Kinnear says. “They’ve got better players than us but we might do it as a team.”
Dover, 12th in the Conference and four points off the play-offs, are very much a team. Their 2-0 victory at Welling on New Year’s Day was their 16th match unbeaten in all competitions and Kinnear says that while he does not have any stars in his young squad, he expects Dover to pose problems for Palace with a blend of organisation and athleticism that helped them beat Cheltenham and Morecambe on their way to the third round. He is not getting carried away and accepts there will be long periods when Dover will be forced back by their Premier League opponents.
