"The Conservative party leadership battle will be over by Christmas," predicts the Times today. Welcome to 32 weeks of agitated behaviour from an animal abandoned by its owner just as it was beginning to love him.
The various factions will use the broadsheets and the Spectator magazine to set out their claims to the leadership or a prominent job on the frontbench - or, as they will put it, to "engage in a wide-ranging debate about the party's future direction".
Normally this debate would be played out on the comment pages of the Telegraph and the Times, but the liberal press seems to be taking the lead this time.
Hence John Bercow's attack on Mr Howard's campaign in today's Independent. The 43-year-old MP for Buckingham was once a noted rightwinger, but his article positions him firmly in the modernising wing of the party. "We have focused far too much on immigration, even though it is nowhere near top of voters' priorities," he says. "It is outrageous that respected Europhile and socially liberal colleagues should be threatened with the sack by cliques of activists who are completely unrepresentative of the country." Message: We won't get anywhere by pandering to the Ukip vote.
Over in the Guardian, meanwhile, Tim Yeo explains that the Conservatives can only win by moving back to the centre ground, embracing social justice and tackling climate change.
None of the likely candidates love the Mirror, but it doesn't care. The paper runs a spoof endorsement of Nicholas Soames' putative leadership manifesto today: "Make aeroplane seats MUCH wider."
