Having celebrated our diamond wedding this year, perhaps I might add a word to the sound thinking of Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett (Lockdown has made it easier to talk about how difficult love can be, 22 July). Her suggestion that tolerance is apt for a successful marriage is certainly wise. But there is one quality which may help even more. That is curiosity.
I would urge unending curiosity about the person you happen to have the good fortune to be with. This will satisfy your life’s journey far more than a billion dollars or a seat in the Lords. I know this because I have been privileged to know many women and men in my life who have astounded me with their very being – some in books, some in life, some living, some dead.
But the one person in particular, with whom I share this year’s diamond wedding, has made my curiosity and understanding endless and undiminished. Love, and this wonderful lifetime of friendship, is there for us all. Be inquisitive. Always learn. And you’ll find that any human being is more beautiful – at any age, of any race, or in any place – than the most exquisite rose or the most dazzling night sky.
Dr Ian Flintoff
Oxford
