Ever wanted to watch Robert De Niro jerking off over porn tapes and repeatedly jamming his thumb up Zac Efron’s ass? Ever felt the need to see Efron strap a stuffed toy on to his penis and comically simulate oral sex with a minor? If the answer to either of these questions is no, then steer away from Dirty Grandpa, just as you would sidestep a dog turd on the pavement. The plot is simple – De Niro’s recently widowed OAP gets his grandson to drive him to Florida so that he can “fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck” a much younger woman (Aubrey Plaza) by pretending to be a college professor.
En route, Zac’s uptight lawyer will smoke crack, get threatened with anal rape, and wear clothes splattered with crime victims’ blood and semen. Long-time Sacha Baron Cohen collaborator Dan Mazer directs, leaving us longing for the cock-in-a-slot-machine subtlety of Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa from which this steals its star-studded riffs. Somewhere, in the very bowels of hell, Dirty Grandpa is playing on an eternal double bill with Movie 43, awaiting the arrival of all involved.
