I’ve been made director of a charity but am stressed and have no work-life balance
I work for a small charity – a job I love for a cause I am passionate about. I feel this is my vocation and up until recently it was one I felt I excelled at.
Around four months ago I got a promotion to director, but since then I’ve been struggling to cope. The role has far more responsibility than I have ever had, and as the charity is so small I’ve had to take on managing the whole team, which includes all the HR, recruitment, budgeting etc. I am finding it incredibly stressful and feel I am doing a bad job.
I also have a very demanding boss who piles on the pressure. I work late every night and often work weekends as well, just to catch up. I have tried to talk to my boss about it, but he says I need to learn to delegate and deal with the pressure, which to an extent I agree with – but I don’t really know how to do these things.
I don’t want to have to leave as I care about what I do so much and really believe in the cause. But it means I can’t really have a life outside of work. Should I look for something else or just try and make the best of the situation and see it as good experience?
Jeremy says
One thing’s certain: something’s got to change. Go on for much longer like this and, however many hours a week you work, you’ll soon be unable to do the job to your own satisfaction, let alone anyone else’s.
For many people, making the transition from doing everything yourself to successful delegation is one of most challenging stages in a career – and the reason is an honourable one. It’s quite difficult for conscientious people with no inflated opinion of their own ability and status to off-load work on to more junior members of staff. There’s the fear the work won’t be as good, which initially may be true, and an understandable diffidence about giving instructions to others who may be of a similar age.
The only way to overcome these natural hesitations is to take a deep breath and go for it. On one clear project, pick a promising junior, give them as full and as helpful a brief as you can and ask them to come back to you in, say, 10 days. Then resist making any uninvited interventions. You’ll be a little apprehensive, but the chances are you’ll be surprised and pleased with the progress made. And that will give you the confidence to delegate more tasks – and gradually find room to oversee work to your own standards and still have time for yourself.
Please don’t walk away from a job you love unless and until you’ve tried everything to master the art of delegation.
Readers say
• It can be hard to let go, but you can do it in a structured way and keep in touch with delegated tasks/functions. You have to do it. You won’t be the only person in your organisation who can manage every function, and I wonder if by not delegating you’re adding significantly to the pressure you feel. jewell79
• I’m also a charity director and when first in the role it was rather daunting. You can’t be fully competent on day one, but what you do is make sure you grow your competence – and therefore your confidence – month on month. You may need help with this. If your boss is a good one, and it rather sounds like he may not be the most natural coach, he should be able to guide you. If your boss is not the best person for this, ask whether some time/money could be made available to find a coach. Don’t give up though. You got the job on your own merits, I would imagine, so someone – your boss quite possibly – recognised your potential. ID5567273
• As a director you shouldn’t be doing any actual day-to-day work yourself; you should be focusing on strategic direction and making sure your staff have the necessary skills and information to take on those responsibilities. Part of being a good boss is putting trust in your staff to take ownership of their roles. EddieValentine
How do I leave my Tefl job in China and get back home to a decent graduate role?
I’ve been in China for nearly two years working as an English teacher. I enjoy it here but am completely sick of Tefl and want to do something else.
I turn 25 this year and am worried I’m getting too old for graduate-level jobs. I was quite naive when I started and didn’t realise what a bad reputation Tefl teachers seem to have as being lazy failures. I have really tried to make my time in China productive. I put a lot of effort into planning lessons and have built good relationships with students and colleagues. I’ve also engaged with local culture rather than spending my time in expat bars, and learned Mandarin, done martial arts classes and written a blog.
I’m desperate to get back to the UK but terrified of job hunting and getting repeated rejections. I don’t know how to make my time in China seem like an asset. I have thought about writing a cover letter along the lines of “I am aware that ESL teachers have a bad reputation, but I feel that my time as a Tefl teacher has actually been beneficial because ... ” – is that a good idea? I have little experience of interviews.
The idea of working as a Chinese teacher or translator appeals to me, but I think both those choices will require a postgraduate qualification. I really like the idea of going into ESL or educational publishing and I think I’d be good at it, but without experience of publishing I don’t know how I can convince employers to take a chance on me.
Jeremy says
You’re being far too defensive and pessimistic. If you start job hunting with your confidence so obviously fragile it will shine through every application you make, severely hampering your chances.
The first thing to do is an online search for UK jobs that require knowledge of China and/or Mandarin. You’ll be surprised by the number and variety. Browsing them will give you new ideas and bolster your sense of optimism.
Then banish from your head all your preconceptions about the reputation of ESL teachers. They may in part be well-founded, but by raising the issue you do nothing to dispel it – rather, the reverse.
You have nothing to be apologetic about. At 25 it is perfectly acceptable for you to be beginning such a search and you have much to offer. (You don’t say what subject you graduated in, but it must be particularly relevant to certain occupations.) Don’t let your apprehension about interviews freak you out: just prepare yourself for them. I was happy to endorse Jenny Rogers’ book Job Interview Success a few years ago and it will certainly help you.
Pick one or two prime prospects and write a thoughtful, tailor-made, confident and – above all – enthusiastic covering letter of application to each.
Readers say
• What you’ve done by 25 is very good: worked abroad, learned a language, developed inter-cultural competence. These are good transferable skills. That’s the asset. oommph
• You can say “I have worked hard to ensure my time teaching English has been a positive experience for my pupils and myself.” Just say the good stuff you did without saying the bad stuff people may think. lucybluerocks
• Get a formal qualification in Chinese and you are made – translation needs a high level of language skills, including written. ajchm
Do you need advice on a work issue? For Jeremy’s and readers’ help, send a brief email to dear.jeremy@theguardian.com. Please note that he is unable to answer questions of a legal nature or to reply personally.
