I don’t perform well face to face. How can I convince an employer to take me on?
I am having trouble finding a job. I completed a research-based PhD in 2013, and after that managed to secure a role outside academia. However, I did not thrive in that environment and was asked to leave during my probationary period.
I have since struggled to find employment. Part of the problem is that I am not sure what to do. I do not wish to return to academia or the type of role that my last job was. This means I am left applying for roles that I am not fully experienced for.
I am trying to find academic-related roles that aren’t research (most often in admin), but am often turned down for lack of direct experience, even in the few entry-level positions I have come across. I have a feeling that being older and having had a relatively high-paying job before excludes me from graduate-level roles.
Another issue is that I don’t interview well. I am shy and have anxiety and confidence issues, and although I try to come across as confident some interviewers have told me in feedback that I appeared too nervous. Others have taken issue with the fact that I only stayed in my last position for six months (although I don’t say “failed probation” and instead say something like “my strengths are better applied to a role such as this”) and have been unemployed for the past six months. I know I was the second-choice candidate on at least two occasions.
I am beginning to get very anxious that I will never find a position. I have interviewed for nearly 10 roles and have been unsuccessful every time, which is in turn making me very depressed. How can I convince employers to take a chance on me? I am hard-working, reliable and organised, but I feel that these attributes aren’t enough to separate me from other applicants.
Jeremy says
If you were second-choice on at least two occasions, out of a total of fewer than 10 interviews, then you’ve no grounds for such extreme pessimism. But you have clearly become introverted, allowing yourself to brood too much on your lack of self-confidence, which in turn makes you all the more hesitant about yourself and your sense of direction. You say that part of your problem is that you don’t know what you want to do. That must be right. If you’re simply drifting, hoping that something will turn up, it is no wonder that other candidates, with a clearer sense of purpose, are preferred.
You shouldn’t just be hoping to convince employers to simply “take a chance” on you; that is much too diffident an approach.
What I’m going to suggest may seem like a bit of a gimmick, but if you follow it seriously I believe you should find it helpful. I want you to stop thinking about yourself subjectively and start thinking about yourself as if you were another person. Write an assessment of yourself in the third person, being as detached and objective – and as honest – as you can. Why, for example, did you not thrive in the environment of your first job which led to you failing your probation? There is nothing to be ashamed of there, but you need to face up to it and learn from it.
When you list your strengths and accomplishments – again as if they were the attributes of another person – I think you will be surprised how quietly impressive they are. It will seem inconceivable that such a person would be unable to find a satisfying job. I think, too, that out of this analysis will come the beginnings of a sense of direction. I think you’ll see that if you were advising this other person, you would find it relatively easy to sense the kind of work they’d find involving and satisfying.
When armed with this clearer picture of yourself, you should approach your next interview in a very different state of mind – not hesitantly, preoccupied with the fear of failure, but with a new confidence. Not a superficial confidence of manner, which nearly always come across as phoney, but a confidence based on a degree of self-certainty. I suspect you’ll shrink from this suggestion, but do please try it.
Readers say
• It sounds like you are in a highly competitive job market, and while you aren’t failing disastrously, the little things that flag a small concern about you are enough to lose you the role. The one thing you should do straight away is find some sort of voluntary role, ideally related to your skills or hoped for career – this will keep you busy and positive, give you something current to talk about in interviews, give you a recent reference, and maybe open up new opportunities. salamandertome
• You need help with your interviewing technique, to boost your self-confidence and the way you come across. Building up some questions and answers is a start, but you need someone qualified to run an interview simulation with you (ideally videoed) so you can see where you are doing well – or not. Fwoggie
Help! I need time off for an interview, but I’ve only been in my job a short time
I started a new job last month, but the dream job I applied for months ago has just come open and I have been called in for an interview. It’s at 9:30am on a Friday and they have arranged for me to meet with three different people. They advised that I will be involved in interviews for two hours. By the time I could get back to my job, it will be noon or 12:30pm.
I have been entirely punctual, even working late many nights, but as I am still so new, how do I get this time off?
Jeremy says
This is too good an opportunity to pass over. At the same time, of course, there can be no certainty that you’ll land this dream job. So there’s no perfect solution. I believe your best bet is this: do everything you can to see that your work is covered that Friday morning, then see your line manager and say that you need to be out of the office for three hours on private business.
Explain that you have done everything you can to cover your work – and say that you plan to work an extra three hours that evening (or whenever makes most sense) to compensate for time lost. This will at least square your conscience. If you’re asked about the nature of this private business, I am afraid you’ll need to apologise politely but say you need it to remain private.
Readers say
• You are entitled to holiday, and should book the day off as soon as possible. If you feel a need to explain why, keep it vague – it was something arranged for ages which you forgot about with all the excitement of starting your new job. Taking a day off would also mean you didn’t have to come into work afterwards, all suited and booted, which is a bit of a giveaway. hermoine
• Throw a sickie but make sure you tell your potential new employer what you’ve done. Put a positive spin on it saying that you didn’t want to risk being refused the day as holiday as you really want this job. monsterchild
• Take annual leave. Any of the other excuses suggested (for example, throwing a sickie) will see you dismissed from your current post should your current employer find out – and they will if approached for a reference. VSLVSL
Do you need advice on a work issue? For Jeremy’s and readers’ help, send a brief email to dear.jeremy@theguardian.com. Please note that he is unable to answer questions of a legal nature or to reply personally.
