Quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick, who was planted into the ground often enough to grow roots, said, "It's never good to get embarrassed like that."
Miami Dolphins coach Brian Flores, whose eight months of head-coach preparation were gone in the eight opening seconds, said, "We've got problems on offense, defense and special teams."
And 230 days until the No. 1 pick.
What, you want to get mad? Act all frustrated? That would mean holding this Dolphins team to normal NFL standards, meaning questioning players who shouldn't be in these positions, questioning coaches for being given unqualified players and, if we're really getting serious, questioning management for going down this road of deciding this year doesn't much matter.
Or can we move on to something more serious, like making hotel reservations for the draft next April 25 in Las Vegas.
The Dolphins insist they aren't tanking, that they really plan to try this year. But, if Sunday's 59-10 loss to Baltimore wasn't further evidence of a tank job, they really are in trouble moving ahead. If this franchise actually thinks it's trying to win, it's in worse shape that anyone imagines.
Surely they are worse in some form, too. Losing like causes issues like the Pro Football Talk report that there's a "mutiny" and Dolphins players want out. What, already? That's the script for Week 4. Besides, how many players are left with the career heft or talent level to push for a trade?
Great cornerback Xavien Howard? Good defensive back Bobby McCain? Maybe even Minkah Fitzpatrick, considering he was oddly on the sideline for chunks of Sunday. Reshad Jones' age (31), two surgically repaired shoulders and rich contract the next two years makes him untradeable.
Sorry, this roster isn't even good enough to have a real mutiny.
Back to Sunday: Let's just say Operation (Unintentional) Tank opened to perfection as the Miami Dolphins played like a severely un-oiled machine. If anything, they looked too un-oiled in a blowout loss to Baltimore, right from each team's opening play, to the point I was second-guessing my 0-16 prediction.
Could I have over-sold them?
Baltimore's first play: Running back Mark Ingram took a simple, off-tackle play and busted through the foggy shroud of a Dolphins defense for 49 yards.
"Should've been 80 yards," Ingram said. "I looked around to see if any (Dolphins defender) was there and that's why they caught me."
That sums up the day, Baltimore disappointed a 49-yard run didn't go for a touchdown. No matter. Baltimore got its first of eight touchdowns _ one of many Dolphins team records _ at the end of the drive to lead to ...
The Dolphins first play: Fitzpatrick came to the line, surveyed the defense and used his 15 years of experience to call an audible upon reading the one-on-one coverage against his 6-5 receiver, Preston Williams.
Just one problem.
"I didn't hear it," Williams said. "I had a M.A."
That's a "Missed Assignment," for those keeping tabs at home. That led to an A.E.P. _ "Another Embarrassing Play." Fitzpatrick, who was under a severe rush from a blitzing Ravens player, threw the ball to Williams, who was run-blocking as the pass hit the ground near him.
"That kind of set the tone for the day right there," Fitzpatrick said.
The season, too? That's getting ahead of ourselves and, as I keep warning people, you've got to take it one loss at a time.
Among the many Baltimore stars on Sunday, Lamar Jackson shone most brightly. The Pompano Beach native tied a Ravens franchise record for five touchdown passes. He completed 17-of-20 passes for 324 yards. He had a 158.3 quarterback rating.
He only played three quarters, too. For that matter, fellow-Broward alum Marquise Brown only played 12 plays and caught four passes for 147 yards and two touchdowns. Think if Baltimore really wanted to run up the score, the way some suggested after they ran a fake punt while up, 35-3?
Think, too, that Jackson could have been a Dolphin. They didn't want him in the 2018 draft. That's important to underline since this franchise not only wants the No. 1 pick this year but needs to choose the right quarterback.
Can they? Will they? And will it matter? Remember, the first two rules of tanking are: 1) It's the last refuge of dumb franchises; and 2) If need the No. 1 pick to get a franchise quarterback, you're not smart enough to build around him.
On the topic of franchise quarterbacks, Josh Rosen came in late for Fitzpatrick and promptly threw an interception on his second pass. Not that anyone can get worked up over a quarterback issue now. Not after watching this line. Not after watching this full day play out.
The Dolphins can't be as bad as Sunday showed. Can they?
They can't give up a franchise-record 643 yards or a regular-season record of 59 points every game. Can they?
Well, New England comes to town next Sunday with newcomer Antonio Brown.
So we're about to find out.
