In the 75th anniversary edition of BBC Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs, David Beckham revealed that when he and Victoria began their courtship, they met in secret in his “amazing bright blue” BMW. “I drove down, I picked her up,” he confessed to Kirsty Young of those heady days. “We used to sit in a Harvester car park and we just used to kiss, of course, and spend time together.”
Although the rest of us may not have Simon Fuller forcing us to conduct our relationships in secret (or indeed an amazing bright blue BMW), we can at least drive to a Harvester car park with someone we fancy. The question is, how should we date when we get there?
Cultivate a long-distance romance
Harvester car parks are ideally situated for the long-distance lover with a massive appetite: basically, you can meet in the middle and have a Rocky Horror sundae the size of your head while you’re romancing. “Harvesters are on main roads and have large car parks,” explains Anneli Fereday, Harvester’s marketing manager, who was “pleasantly surprised” to discover Posh and Becks once dated there. “And our sites are away from the high street and prying eyes.” Privacy and an unlimited salad bar ... what more could you want?
Head for a secluded area
No one wants to see you and your beloved necking right outside the entrance or, more realistically, sitting next to each other on your phones, scrolling through news feeds, signing online petitions and looking really frightened. Harvesters are family restaurants – don’t be putting the kids off their Mega Ribs.
Pick the right Harvester
With more than 200 restaurants across the UK, some of the car parks are in surprisingly sexy locations. “The Spyglass in Weymouth, and the Neptune and Durley Inn in Bournemouth have car parks with a glorious sea view,” Fereday advises.
Embrace your inner Brit
You might not feel very proud of your country right now. What’s more British, then, than driving to a Harvester, preferably in the rain, in a Ford Fiesta, and eating a takeaway in the car park? Try it. You might feel the strange stirrings of Britishness as the scent of chips mingles with car upholstery. Either that, or you’ll feel sad and have a row.
Spend more time trying to find the car park exit than on your actual date
Car parks, after all, primarily serve to remind us that we have no sense of direction, neither in life nor in a Harvester. To immediately find the exit after your romantic evening would only make you look creepy and suspicious, like the kind of person who dates in Harvester car parks – which is probably only a good look if you’re Posh and Becks. And it’s the 90s.
