New mum Dani Dyer has told that she feared she had postnatal depression.
The 24-year-old welcomed baby son Santiago - Santi - with partner Sammy Kimmence in January, and has been candid about the ups and downs of motherhood since.
And speaking on Sorted with the Dyers, the podcast she hosts with EastEnders star dad Danny, she told that she began to worry after "not feeling herself" for a couple of days.
"This has been a f***ing long, cold, hard winter this one," Danny said, as they spoke about lockdown.
"And even if you're the strongest cat out there then you're struggling now."
Dani chimed in: "It's been awful.
"The other day I was really struggling, I had a couple of days where I made a shepherd's pie but I just felt so down.
"And I think when you've just had a baby you really start worrying, thinking, 'Am I suffering with a bit of postnatal depression?'
"I know this sounds weird but I made the shepherd's pie but it was like I wasn't making it.
"I had a couple of days of just really not feeling me and then I went on a walk and I felt back to myself. I felt so low."
Proud mum Dani has already put thought into Santi's future - including his career.
"I literally love our morning cuddles together," she said filming herself and Santi for an Instagram video, "I'm watching Billy Elliot and I just think… Imagine if he was Billy Elliot on the stage?
"I'd love it, I'd love him to be in the West End performing. I don't know why I'm thinking about his career path, it's literally years, years, years away. I'm just excited for it."
New grandad Danny, meanwhile, has turned into a "softie."
Dani told OK! magazine : "The other day he was nearly crying like, 'I love babies and that, but your baby...I've never felt anything like this'.
"Santi's his first grandchild and I feel like that's hit him more after the birth."
If you're struggling and need to talk, the Samaritans operates a free helpline open 24/7 on 116 123. Alternatively, you can email Jo@samaritans.org if you'd prefer to write down how you feel. You are not alone.
