Dan Glaister's California fire diary

George Bush is a regular guy, just like you and me. Well, just like me. George and I both benefit from clearing brush. It's a cleansing, cleaning thing. And it's necessary. No brush, no fire, see?

The US president is seen participating in a volunteer programme to clear brush in Florida in 2004. Photograph: Stephen Jaffe/AFP

Fire may be irksome to those in the canyons, but to the dudes … for some, the high winds and high temperatures spell only doom, gloom and that whole negativity vibe. For the surfers, it’s the big Kahuna.

A surfer scans the waves at Surfrider Beach as smoke from fires in the Santa Monica mountains blows out to sea. Photograph: Reed Saxon/AP

Malibu. Celebrity relief rippled through the mountains as it became clear that the news Ralph's store was damaged referred not to Ralph Lauren but to Ralph's, the place where the ugly people go.

A fire helicopter drops water on a home under construction. Photograph: Mark J Terrill/AP

Information superhighway, new media … faggedaboudit. Local TV dedicated huge resources to the fires. But how to know if the smoke over the hill was real or cloud? TV wouldn't tell, nor the bloggers.

The sun appears through smoke from the Harris wildfire in San Diego County. Photograph: Chris Carlson/AP

Those winds. The Santa Ana winds, according to local lore, can send you plain crazy. Men leave their womenfolk, cats howl and chickens fly. “Anything can happen," Raymond Chandler wrote in Red Wind.

A couple hold one another for support as they struggle to stop themselves being blown over by the winds that toppled their trailer. Photograph: David McNew/Getty

“This part of Old Topanga hasn't burned in 100 years.” So we wait, clearing brush, listening to the wind, glancing at the ridge, tracking the helicopters. The palm trees flutter in the hot breeze. Photograph: Ali Kayley/freelance

Day of the Triffids, On the Beach, Key Largo. There's an eerie feeling about waiting for disaster. Everyone has left now, except for a few. Little happens, few cars pass. Is it over? Is it beginning?

Interstate 15 is shut down as the Rice fire destroys at least 100 homes. Photograph: David McNew/Getty

Fires Photograph: Chris Carlson/AP

Things to take when the fire strikes. The woman at the Topanga Coalition for Emergency Preparedness inquires about my pets. I have no pets. Pictures, then, she says. Pictures, says the evacuee on TV.

Residents evacuated from the San Diego wildfires queue for food at the evacuation center at Qualcomm stadium. Photograph: Denis Poroy/AP

Actually, I was lying. I do have pets. Chickens. Six. What to do? Take them in a suitcase, Borat-style? Leave them to fry? Let them out to meet the coyotes? Neither I, nor the chickens, know. We wait.

Dan Glaister's chickens. Photograph: Ali Kayley/guardian.co.uk