Detroit Lions coach Dan Campbell seems to be the kind of guy who can’t carry a conversation without making a headline. It’s not that what he’s saying is particularly newsworthy. It’s just that he tends to get pretty weird — generally in a funny way.
His opening remarks to Lions players seem to be yet another example. During an interview with reporter Mike Silver, the rookie head coach provided a window into that opening address with his new players.
“I told (the players), honestly, day one, I said, ‘Look, I’m not carrying your toilet paper around,” Campbell told Silver. “I’m not gonna wipe your butt. You’re gonna wipe your own butt. You handle it and I’ll treat you like men until you prove otherwise.'”
New @Lions HC Dan Campbell: "I told (the players), honestly, day one, I said, 'Look, I'm not carrying your toilet paper around. I'm not gonna wipe your butt. You're gonna wipe your own butt. You handle it and I'll treat you like men until you prove otherwise.'" More to come soon.
— Michael Silver (@MikeSilver) July 2, 2021
Is this the status quo for Campbell? I feel like we can now expect bizarre thoughts like this one on a weekly basis during the season.
After all, he said he wants his players to “bite the kneecaps off” their opponents during his introductory press conference. That’s quite the carefully-crafted image — albeit grotesque.
Either way, fans proceeded with plenty of jokes on Twitter.
Print the T-shirts https://t.co/hoZ6eQbons
— Patrick Claybon (@PatrickClaybon) July 2, 2021
https://t.co/7RKxJZu03X pic.twitter.com/CLP5HKc1rB
— Pride of Detroit (@PrideOfDetroit) July 2, 2021
Lions players aren't potty trained yet? Geez going to be a longer season than I thought for Detroit fans
— Bill Enright (@BillEnright) July 2, 2021
Players distraught, one anonymous star said "I really expected him to wipe for us".
— John Osment (@RohnJobert) July 2, 2021
I get real Mike Singletary vibes, 1-16, 0-17 would not shock me.
— Travis Hawkins ♿ (@TDHawk21) July 2, 2021
Honestly, I’m just looking forward to what Campbell says next.
