That’s it from us
But thanks for joining us for all of the live action from what was a very one-sided Anzac Day match. The monkey is off Nathan Buckley’s back and 85,000 people have witnessed the Pies getting their mojo back in a big way. Essendon were gallant after half-time but the damage was already done by then. G’night!
Collingwood win it by 69 points! Steele Sidebottom wins the Anzac Medal!
Dons goal! 4th quarter (3:20 remaining): Collingwood 22.10 (142) v Essendon 11.7 (73)
Finally we’re out of our misery but not before Fantasia makes an unselfish mess of a gilt-edged scoring chance when he centres shambolically to Cooney. Appropriately metaphoric is both that and Mitch Brown’s post-siren miss from thirty metres out.
“It’s unreal man,” giant Pies debutant Mason Cox tells Ansrew Welsh after the siren. “It’s been a hell of a 24 hours from the family.” He was very impressive today in his attack on the ball and got things off to a perfect start by kicking the opener. What else is left to say? It was a hammering but the Dons did at least fight it out in the second half.
Anzac Medal: goes to Steele Sidebottom, who was excellent today with four goals and 33 possessions.
Dons goal! 4th quarter (3:20 remaining): Collingwood 22.10 (142) v Essendon 11.6 (72)
Adam Cooney picks himself up a consolation goal as he scoots into the goal square for an easy chance but the celebration is appropriately muted.
Pies goal! 4th quarter (4:11 remaining): Collingwood 22.10 (142) v Essendon 10.5 (65)
Levi Greenwood might be in trouble with the tribunal this week but he’s making it count today and boots his second goal with a raking, long set shot. Not much else of interest remains to be achieved in this game.
Updated
Pies goal! 4th quarter (6:36 remaining): Collingwood 21.10 (136) v Essendon 10.5 (65)
This is sort of high-level match practice for both sides now and possibly even a good time for struggling players to rack up some numbers. Unfortunately for Martin Gleeson he’s currently filling the clanger column as he roosts a clearance into Row F. It doesn’t immediately cost anything for his side but Collingwood trap it inside their attacking zone for an age until Goddard clears. James Aish misses a set shot and, it has to be said, hasn’t otherwise impressed today. The opposite of that has been Taylor Adams, who returned with a vengeance from a knock on his knee early in the day and now caresses through a running goal from outside fifty. He’s been superb.
Dons goal! 4th quarter (10:21 remaining): Collingwood 20.9 (129) v Essendon 10.5 (65)
He reacts as though he’s just received an unfavourable tax return, but Zach Merrett has banana’d an excellent goal for the Bombers as they continue to restore some pride. Pity half his fans are probably most of the way home at this point.
Pies goal! 4th quarter (11:36 remaining): Collingwood 20.9 (129) v Essendon 9.5 (59)
This has been a decent effort from the Bombers in the second half and again they go close to a goal when Dempsey sprints clear at half-forward but his running shot breaks right to miss. After a prolonged period of faffing about, Jarryd Blair appears on stage again to thread his third goal of the day. How is there still 11 minutes left?
Travis Varcoe has injured his hamstring
Dons goal! 4th quarter (16:13 remaining): Collingwood 19.8 (122) v Essendon 9.4 (58)
In other news, Travis Varcoe is done for the day with what appears to be a hamstring injury, though he’s really striding around the boundary in his civvies. His thigh is definitely strapped up though. Otherwise, the umpires are having to create their own fun with a score review when Ben Reid looks to have touched the ball close to the line but it goes favourably for the Bombers so James Kelly’s goal stands. He’s had 26 touches today, Kelly. Certainly not Essendon’s worst.
Dons goal! 4th quarter (19:36 remaining): Collingwood 19.8 (122) v Essendon 8.4 (52)
Orazio Fantasia again! Again the Dons win it forward from the first bounce, again the best-named player in the league gets on the end of it to goal.
Three-quarter time: the Dons are fighting hard but it's all Collingwood
Three-quarter time: Collingwood 19.8 (122) v Essendon 7.4 (46)
As the clock runs down on this third term, reader Ian Swan is back with a sharp observation. “Maybe it’s because I haven’t watched Essendon on television this year,” he says, “but the coach’s box – staffed by a pharmacist – is sponsored by a pharmacy. Who knew there was a sense of humour at Windy Hill?” Whatever the prescription was today, Collingwood have filled it.
Dons goal! 3rd quarter (2:14 remaining) Collingwood 19.8 (122) v Essendon 7.4 (46)
He’s been a prolific goal-kicker at VFL level but now Sam Grimley has a second opportunity in the term to kick one at AFL level. Again he makes no mistake – or does he? The umpire asks for a score review on account of the suspicion it might have shaved the post on its way over his head. It gets the all clear!
Pies goal! 3rd quarter (4:01 remaining) Collingwood 19.8 (122) v Essendon 6.4 (40)
Brawl! Not really, just a bit of push and shove between Adam Treloar and Brendon Goddard in the middle and even they eventually decide that they’re better off not making a donation to the AFL coffers. Fasolo gets a chance for a fifth but misses with his snap and replays reveal that Levi Greenwood and David Zaharakis were the other players at the centre of that scuffle. Greenwood makes it an even more eventful day on a personal level by thumping a long goal over the umpire’s hat.
Pies goal! 3rd quarter (5:57 remaining) Collingwood 17.7 (115) v Essendon 6.4 (40)
Again the Pies answer immediately after the re-start, this time with Alex Fasolo’s fourth for the day. It’s another long set shot from a touch outside 50 and the way he’s kicking them today it was never in doubt.
Updated
Dons goal! 3rd quarter (6:33 remaining) Collingwood 17.7 (109) v Essendon 6.4 (40)
Mason Cox has been eye-catching at the very least today and again the giant forward is marauding away for a mark inside 50. The cameras pan to his proud parents, who are sitting with St Kilda’s American import Jason Holmes. I wonder what they make of the Four ‘n Twenty pies. Not much I suspect. Anyway, Mitch Brown has missed another straightforward set shot but in the immediate aftermath his former Cats teammate Matthew Stokes makes no mistake with one of his own. They’re winning the quarter!
Pies goal! 3rd quarter (10:32 remaining) Collingwood 17.6 (108) v Essendon 5.3 (33)
As if to highlight how incongruous Grimley’s goal celebration was, Jordan de Goey belts one through a matter of seconds later for the Pies to push the lead back out to 75 points. It’s a cakewalk alright.
Levi Greenwood reported for striking Brendon Goddard
Dons goal! 3rd quarter (10:59 remaining) Collingwood 16.6 (102) v Essendon 5.3 (33)
Just when this game was losing its sting, up steps Levi Greenwood with an undisciplined punch to the chest of Dons skipper Brendon Goddard and he’s been reported for his troubles! Hmm, not sure that’s worth forfeiting a match payment over Levi, but whatever floats your boat. In case you were wondering, Sam Grimley is indeed on the ground today and soon finds himself shooting for his fourth career goal. He goes back, takes his time and boots it through! Having scored only a single goal in each of the first two terms, Essendon have three in this one and it’s only half-way done. Grimley’s celebrating his goal like it’s a Grand Final-winner.
Dons goal! 3rd quarter (15:34 remaining) Collingwood 16.6 (102) v Essendon 4.3 (27)
Daniher finally gets his first when he finds some room to snap high, long and handsome for the goal after shimmying past Ben Reid with the crumb. It was hardly balletic but he’s got the job done.
Pies goal! 3rd quarter (16:55 remaining) Collingwood 16.6 (102) v Essendon 3.3 (21)
I haven’t actually mentioned Josh Smith yet today but the young Pie is also on debut and he roves a pack beautifully here to snap his first goal in AFL footy. Like Cox earlier, he’s enveloped by appreciative teammates. He’s had 15 disposals, 2 tackles and 100% justified his selection in the side.
Pies goal! 3rd quarter (17:31 remaining) Collingwood 15.6 (96) v Essendon 3.3 (21)
Essendon are showing a bit here. Now Merrett finds the mostly unsighted Joe Daniher with a sharp pass but his set shot is off line. Unfortunately the Pies immediately and authoritatively rebound and big Mason Cox fires out the releasing handball so that Fasolo can boot a running goal from close range.
Updated
Dons goal! 3rd quarter (19:41 remaining) Collingwood 14.6 (90) v Essendon 3.2 (20)
Orright, we’re back in the third term and somewhat against the grain of the day it’s Essendon winning the clearance and bombing it long for Fantasia to run ont the ball and boot through an open goal within 20 seconds. Slick start, even if Leigh Matthews doesn’t bother to look up the goal-kicker’s name in his Footy Record.
Half-time: Collingwood lead by a whopping 76 points at the main break
Half-time: Collingwood 14.6 (90) v Essendon 2.2 (14)
“It’s coming down pretty hot,” is Dons defender James Gwilt’s assessment of his task at the moment. He’s not wrong. The Pies have equalled their best scoring effort for the season and it’s only half-time. Some stats: Collingwood lead the contested possession count by 26 and 47 in total, which is damning, but other than that...
Steele Sidebottom has 20 touches and four goals, while Scott Pendlebury has 23 possessions in a dominant midfield display. James Kelly, David Zaharakis and Orazio Fantasia have all battled hard but it’s one-way traffic today.
Pies goal! 2nd quarter (0:11 remaining) Collingwood 14.6 (90) v Essendon 2.2 (14)
As the first half meanders towards its conclusion it’s probably worth noting that Scott Pendlebury and Steele Sidebottom are now north of 20 possessions apiece and Sidebottom has four goals to go with it. They play a role in working the ball forward again and with seconds left in the half, Fasolo threads a shot from close range so that his side is equal with it’s highest score for the season. This is just a mauling. What a shame for the 90-odd thousand in attendance.
You know things are going badly when you’re prompting tweets like this:
Kyle Langford has shown signs for the Bombers today. Eight disposals, five tackles, a goal and 53 @AFLFantasy points. #AFLPiesDons
— AFL (@AFL) April 25, 2016
Pies goal! 2nd quarter (4:36 remaining) Collingwood 13.6 (84) v Essendon 2.2 (14)
Perhaps I should just grab a tape of an old game and live blog that instead? I think I have some old Panasonic Cup highlights somewhere. Some Gavin Exell? Anyway, for now I’ll stick with the task at hand and that’s another mark and goal for Darcy Moore, who hasn’t dominated today but has done exceedingly well whenever he’s had an opportunity. His side’s putting on a clinic today.
Pies goal! 2nd quarter (6:49 remaining) Collingwood 12.6 (78) v Essendon 2.2 (14)
Ouch. Mitch Brown continues to present himself as a tall forward but when he gets a chance in the same spot at which he goaled before, he pulls his 20-metre shot left and low to miss. If anyone had been on the line they might actually have marked it. Like literal clockwork, Collingwood sweep it around the other end in an arc and Howe finishes the link of passes by dribbling a snap through from close range.
Pies goal! 2nd quarter (9:10 remaining) Collingwood 11.6 (72) v Essendon 2.1 (13)
Just as I wonder whether TV viewers are finding excuses to clean out the gutters or attend to the washing, reader Ian Swan arrives. “Bruce now desperately trying to keep the television audience engaged,” he notes. “Whilst Collingwood were on a hiding to nothing here – they have to win and win big – it looks like Essendon are getting both the hiding and (next to) nothing on the scoreboard. Beautiful gardening weather.”
Anyone else excusing themselves from the living room to do other things?
To be fair, Essendon are currently deep in their best phase of the game, which is to say we’ve gone more than five minutes without Collingwood kicking a goal. Right as I type that Jarryd Blair bobs up again – I suppose that is something that a man of his small stature can be said to do – and kicks another goal.
Updated
Dons goal! 2nd quarter (13:14 remaining) Collingwood 10.6 (66) v Essendon 2.1 (13)
It’s been a bleak afternoon for the Bombers so far but finally they win it forward, where Mitch Brown marks 25 metres from goal on a 45 degree angle. He takes his time in the approach, leans back and hoists it through for a six-pointer. They’ve been few and far between so far.
Steele Sidebottom well on his way to another Best On Ground in a massive game. #biggameplayer @marngrook @CollingwoodFC
— Leila Gurruwiwi (@alielmg88) April 25, 2016
Pies goal! 2nd quarter (15:18 remaining) Collingwood 10.5 (65) v Essendon 1.1 (7)
Well, when things aren’t going your way I guess they’re really not going your way. Joe Daniher has a fresh air shot when he tries to boot one off the ground and Collingwood immediately sweep it down the other end into the arms of Travis Varcoe. He’s 20 metres out on a slight angle but pushes it across the face. No matter, Jarryd Blair soon threads one through from a similar distance. This is all a bit uncomfortable now.
Pies goal! 2nd quarter (18:45 remaining) Collingwood 9.4 (58) v Essendon 1.1 (7)
Taylor Adams is back from that injury, by the way. Everything else is pretty much a resumption of what we saw before the first break and after Cox fumbles a one-on-one marking attempt, Sidebottom scoots through to kick his fourth. He could reach double figures at this rate. The Pies are on track for a cricket score.
You don’t really need stats to tell you how badly that went for Essendon
...but +6 for Inside-50s, +8 for contested possessions and, well, +45 for scoring paints a pretty clear picture.
sack bucks if collingwood doesn't win by at least 150
— Liam Quinn (@LiamQuinn__) April 25, 2016
Quarter time - Collingwood lead by 45 points after a blistering opening term
Quarter time - Collingwood 8.4 (52) v Essendon 1.1 (7)
This is officially the highest first quarter score by the Pies in games against Essendon, folks. It’s been an obliteration in the first term. The game is effectively done as a contest unless Essendon can find some fresh well of aptitude and poise. At least they’re not giving up. Brendon Goddard reels in a nice interception in the centre, dishes to Daniher and sets up a shot on the siren for Fantasia but there’s no Disney finish. His kick’s off line and the Dons end the first quarter a whopping 45 points behind. This is all a bit ugly.
Updated
Pies goal! 1st quarter (2:12 remaining) Collingwood 8.4 (52) v Essendon 1.0 (6)
The Dons are struggling so badly now that the umpires are allowing Leuenberger a blatant throw when he’s descended upon at the top of the square in Essendon’s attacking zone. The Pies faithful are furious, of course, but the boos soon turn to cheers as they swing it forward and raffle off the goal-scoring opportunity to Jeremy Howe. Howe drills it from 35 metres out on a slight angle while also restoring the sleeve tattoo quota his side might have lacked without Dane Swan. This score has also got me racing off for the record books. More on that shortly.
Pies goal! 1st quarter (5:55 remaining) Collingwood 7.4 (46) v Essendon 1.0 (6)
Essendon go forward through James Kelly but again the Collingwood rebound is devastating so Sidebottom again has a chance to score but this time centres the ball to Fasolo, who trots back and thumps it through from outside 50. The Pies lead by 40 points now but it could be ten goals to be honest.
Pies goal! 1st quarter (7:47 remaining) Collingwood 6.4 (40) v Essendon 1.0 (6)
Oh dear. Sidebottom’s got another now, again receiving a handball and spining around on his left. This time he was 35 metres out but it was no less clinical from the Pies. What was I saying about this one being close? We’ve got seven minutes left in the first term and it’s almost done as a contest.
Pies goal! 1st quarter (8:15 remaining) Collingwood 5.4 (34) v Essendon 1.0 (6)
Hmm, business as usual now. Essendon go forward again but Collingwood rebound with such ferocity that by the time it’s deep inside their forward zone they can almost down tools and conduct a meeting over who’ll kick the goal. Sidebottom gets the task in the end and curls a running shot through on his left. Collingwood’s ball movement is a real sight.
Dons goal! 1st quarter (10:25 remaining) Collingwood 4.4 (28) v Essendon 1.0 (6)
Finally a shot on goal for Essendon when Kyle Langford is caught high by a clumsy Alan Toovey so wins himself a chance from 45 metres out on a slight angle. And the 19-year-old makes it count with a booming goal from just outside the arc. There’s life in the Bombers yet.
Pies goal! 1st quarter (10:25 remaining) Collingwood 4.4 (28) v Essendon 0.0 (0)
Collingwood’s inaccuracy is the only thing keeping Essendon in it at the moment but even that’s being kind. They look nervy and a just a tad overawed by the occasion – fumbling, kicking it out on the full, being caught in possession and missing easy targets. The Pies are a totally different equation. Sidebottom does the team thing by floating a centering ball to the top of the square where Darcy Moore crashes across the pack to take a team-lifting mark. He makes no mistake with the kick and this is just one-way traffic at the MCG. I can’t think of many positives for the Dons. They look lost.
Darcy Moore takes a ripping pack mark! #AFLPiesDons https://t.co/RfOkjzUdiJ
— AFL (@AFL) April 25, 2016
Pies goal! 1st quarter (13:32 remaining) Collingwood 3.3 (21) v Essendon 0.0 (0)
As de Goey continues to exert his will on the contest, the Dons juist cannot get their hands on the ball for prolonged periods of time. Cox soon gets another chance to score but is bumped off an ambitious close-range ‘banana’ and misses to the right. Collingwood were meek last week but they’re bossing the young Bombers around at the moment. Pendlebury hits Varcoe on the chest so hard that the rebound ends up back in his hands and he has a flying shot on goal from outside fifty. It misses but the Dons are never safe and Adam Oxley soon hammers one through on the run from 35 metres out. This is just a rout at the moment.
Mason Cox what a start to your first game! @CollingwoodFC #marngrook
— Shelley Ware (@ShelleyWare) April 25, 2016
Pies goal! 1st quarter (16:19 remaining) Collingwood 2.1 (13) v Essendon 0.0 (0)
Oof, now Maynard has a ping at goal but he’s off line. Collingwood are all over their opponents at the moment and certainly the hungrier side if you judge it by clearances and tackles. One bit of bad news: Taylor Adams is off the ground with what looks like a knee injury. That could be a real blow for Collingwood. But Jordan de Goey’s been everywhere in the early stages of this game and he picks out Steele Sidebottom with a lovely centering pass. From 40 metres out Sidebottom goes back and splits the middle. Essendon are at sea here. Danger signs everywhere.
Pies goal! 1st quarter (18:00 remaining) Collingwood 1.0 (6) v Essendon 0.0 (0)
The Dons win the first clearance of the game and Gwilt is soon roosting it inside fifty to a high-leaping pack but the Pies defence holds firm and they clear through Jack Crisp. Moore grabs the ball at half-forward and spears a pass to the advancing Mason Cox and the debutant marks twenty metres from goal and boots it through for a dream start! Man pile! His teammates are ecstatic for him and why not? That is fairytale stuff. He was in perfect position on the lead and nailed his chance. The Pies are away.
Updated
It’s close to a full house at the MCG
And it cuts a magnificent figure as the camera pans around during the Australian anthem. You’d never be able to tell it was 15th vs 16th unless Leigh Matthews had helpfully pointed it out to the nation. My other favourite moment so far is Seven revealing the small list of players Mason Cox joins in debuting on Anzac Day - have yourself a bit of Craig Jacotine! Go on!
The toss
...is won by Brendon Goddard and the Bombers will kick to the city end. Let’s do this.
No Mark McGough, no Collingwood. #AFLPiesDons #AnzacDay
— Junktime AFL Podcast (@JunktimeAFLPod) April 25, 2016
Hands up if you’re happy with the pre-game entertainment
Our teams today
The Pies are now out on the ground too, with a personal highlight of that for me being the sight of a green light flashing away on the back of Travis Varcoe’s guernsey. Either he’s wearing a GPS tracking device or the umpires need to check him for circuitry.
Making his debut for the Pies is giant ruckman-cum-forward Mason Cox, whose parents arrived from the Unites States in time to see their son experience a real thrill in from of a packed MCG. The Pies are missing their most experienced player in Anzac Day games in the injured Dane Swan, while Travis Cloke – their highest goal-scorer in the fixture – was dropped to the magoos.
Essendon: Matt Dea, James Gwilt, Mark Baguley, Anthony McDonald-Tipungwuti, Michael Hartley, Brendon Goddard, James Kelly, David Zaharakis, Orazio Fantasia, Mathew Stokes, Mitch Brown, Adam Cooney, Sam Grimley, Joe Daniher, Darcy Parish, Matthew Leuenberger, Zach Merrett, Craig Bird, Martin Gleeson, Courtenay Dempsey, Kyle Langford, Conor McKenna
Collingwood: Jack Frost, Nathan J. Brown, Alan Toovey, Adam Oxley, Ben Reid, Josh Smith, Jack Crisp, Jordan De Goey, Steele Sidebottom, Travis Varcoe, Darcy Moore, Levi Greenwood, Alex Fasolo, Mason Cox, Jarryd Blair, Brodie Grundy, Scott Pendlebury, Taylor Adams, Adam Treloar, James Aish, Brayden Maynard, Jeremy Howe
News just in: Alex Rance can accept two weeks for his hit on Jack Watts. You’d take that and run, surely.
Preamble
Hello AFL fans and welcome to the annual Anzac Day blockbuster between Collingwood and Essendon, a game that has come to mean quite a bit more than your standard footy fare to many Australians, while stirring the odd bit of awkwardness and ill-feeling from others.
Today we can at least all agree on one thing: Collingwood’s struggles this season have brought them back to something close to level-pegging with a Bombers side that has clearly over-achieved. Thus we have the prospect of an intriguing little contest between two sides who entered the season with wildly different expectations. The Bombers are now out on the ground and going through their warm-ups.
Feel free to email or tweet me throughout the afternoon on the details above, too. I’ll be back in a minute with today’s teams, perhaps after I’ve fully processed the sight of 65-year-old John Paul Young shimmying away on stage next to Jon Stevens from Noiseworks. Probably better forgotten, that one.
Russell will be with you shortly but in the meantime, check out his thoughts on the AFL season so far.
