Billionaire politician Clive Palmer has announced he will finally retire from politics after his Trumpet of Patriots party failed to secure a single seat at this election, despite incessantly texting us every day of the campaign. Honestly, thank god he decided to retire before he did something silly, like spending $60 million on a failed campaign.
“I’m 71 and I’m getting too old for politics,” he told The Daily Telegraph.
“I’d rather spend time helping the tens of thousands that are homeless and hungry in this country … that’s why I’ve donated $5million to Foodbank.”
The news comes after the Trumpet of Patriots party secured just 1.85 per cent of the primary vote.
In an interview with Channel 7 on Saturday night, Palmer was criticised for his spending.
“You’ve been the great disruptor in this campaign, there’s been absolutely no missing your spam messages on all of our mobile devices,” Seven’s Mark Riley said.
“What was your objective in this campaign? Last time we heard you spent 100-odd million dollars and got about 10 back. You’re doing your dough, what’s the point?”
Palmer responded by pointing out the homelessness epidemic that Australia is facing, which feels like a problem he could’ve solved more efficiently with that $60 million.
“So having a debate, having different ideas, having disagreements is not a bad thing for a democracy,” he said.
Palmer — the sixth richest person in Australia, according to the Australian Financial Review — has had many political affiliations throughout his career, including the Nationals, the Liberal National Party, United Australia, and the Trumpet of Patriots.
He spent $83.6 million at the 2019 election, winning no seats. Then, in 2022, he spent a whopping $123.5 million on a campaign that won just one Senate seat and no House of Representatives seats.
And of course, in 2025 he spent another $60 million advertising the Trumpet of Patriots campaign — again winning precisely zero seats.
I’m no mathematician but that is more than $250 million reportedly spent on political campaigning since 2019, so perhaps it is in the best interest of Clive Palmer to hang up the boots.
Despite his political retirement, Clive Palmer has plenty to keep him busy — including the revival of his Titanic II project. As the name suggests, the plan is to rebuild a Titanic replica that will make the same maiden voyage of the original ship.
The project has been in the works since 2014, but just last year, Palmer held a press conference confirming the project’s revival for reasons that remain incredibly unclear to me.
So if you thought there was no stupider way to burn cash than repeated failed political campaigns, you can rest assured that Palmer has found it in his side hustle of rebuilding the literal Titanic.
Anyway, farewell to Clive Palmer’s political career.
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