The funniest standup I’ve ever seen
Billy Connolly’s incontinence pants routine from his Audience With Billy Connolly. It was the first one I absolutely died laughing at. It’s about a young lad putting these incontinence trousers on, tying them at the bottom on each leg like plus fours and “going down the discotheque”. And then he talks about the guy dancing and filling his pants with piss – it’s just incredibly funny.
The funniest person I know
My mate Jason Cook. He’s a standup comedian and wrote Hebburn, the sitcom I was in. A lot of the things he says that make me laugh I would never tell any other human being on earth.
The funniest thing that shouldn’t be funny
People falling over and really hurting themselves – like knocking all their teeth out.
The funniest sketch I’ve ever seen
Fry and Laurie do this sketch where Hugh Laurie plays a man talking to a policeman and Stephen Fry plays the policeman. Stephen Fry says, “What’s your name?” and Hugh Laurie’s got a little bit of wood and he drops the wood on the table, and the noise the wood makes is his surname. It’s so stupid and so simple – one of those ones where you see it, and you go how did they even think of that?
The funniest film I’ve ever seen
Shaun Of The Dead. I do like zombie films anyway, but it’s just hilarious and quotable. They created the rom-zom-com; there was never a romantic zombie comedy before.
The funniest joke I’ve ever heard
It’s by Gary Delaney and the joke is: “I read a story in the newspaper the other day about the worst man in Britain: apparently he’s a racist and a paedophile. I thought, well, at least some of the kids are safe.”
The funniest book I’ve ever read
Without a doubt, the Alan Partridge autobiography, I, Partridge: We Need To Talk About Alan. It’s a piece of art, every single sentence is a joke. It’s not just the funniest book – it’s the funniest anything that’s ever been created.
Chris Ramsey’s Comedy Hotspots is at the Hippodrome, WC2, Wed
