Just when you thought that the grotesque carnival of the internationally downwardly mobile that is Brexit couldn’t get any worse (“Bring the hideous capering clown, Boris Johnson, to the ring to gibber unintelligibly about ‘Brexit dividends’ to amuse the crowds!”), it appears that Easter eggs could be affected.
Italian confectioner Ferrero, owner of Thorntons and other brands, says that if Britain pulls out of the customs union and the single market, it could affect an array of chocolate products, leading to shortages, delays, higher prices, limited ranges and merchandise going stale in warehouses.
Couched in terms that the expert-fatigued could understand, this basically means that you’d better hope that someone brings back Spangles like it’s 1973 again, because you might not see so many luxury eggs or any other decent chocolate.
Echoing the famous Ferrero Rocher advert, it’s going from: “Ambassador, you’re spoiling us” to: “Ambassador, why have you tossed me a crumbling quarter of a stale chocolate egg from 1998 and my name isn’t even iced on it?”
On the plus side, as good/bad egg is traditionally used in reference to a person’s character, we can all now look forward to it seeming more fitting than ever.
• Barbara Ellen is an Observer columnist
