Children’s repeated cries of ‘I’m bored’ are a standard lament heard by parents, according to new research.
It’s a problem many exasperated parents try to solve by handing their kids an iPad or mobile phone.
“Tech is not the big bad wolf, and it’s so easy to throw your phone or iPad at the problem when faced with a moaning child,” says clinical psychologist Dr Elizabeth Kilbey, one of the experts from Channel 4’s The Secret Life of 4, 5 And 6 Year Olds.
“Too much of this and kids can learn to rely on tech to fix their issues. But you do have alternatives.”
A new study by Argos has found that while parents hear the words ‘I’m bored’ an average of seven times a week, nearly a quarter (23%) of mums and dads say their kids don’t use their imagination as much as they did when they were young, and one in six say their children’s attention span is too short for games they used to play as kids.
So what can parents do to try to fill the endless summer days for kids and beat their boredom?
1. Create a Boring Jar
Put your thinking cap on or scour the internet for simple activities your child will enjoy. Then grab a pen and paper and a jar or bowl.
“Inside, fill it with bits of paper that have an activity on each one, like dress up; have a tea party; do a jigsaw, and other crafts and activities,” advises Kilbey. “Whenever your kid says they’re bored, let them choose a piece of paper and do what it says.”
2. Change the scenery
If your child is cooped up in the house all day, they’re more likely to get bored and be full of unreleased energy.
“Go outside,” suggests Kilbey, “To the park, for a walk or just in the garden, or if it’s wet, get everyone to go upstairs and have an afternoon bath or make a fort out of duvets. A different environment can transform a mood instantly.”
A quick trip to the playground is also incredibly beneficial in helping kids burn off energy, and Kilbey adds: “There are so many activities you can do that don’t cost a penny that will keep the kids entertained all summer long”.
3. Schedule playtime
Try to carve out some time to help your child play.
“As a parent and specialist in child development, I cannot state the importance of play enough,” says Kilbey. “It can help children hone their imagination skills, has been proven to develop social skills, and promotes independence. So my tip is to schedule time for playing.”
She says just 10 minutes of help with play a day is effective in supporting children’s development, adding: “That’s the time it takes to boil the kettle and drink a cup of tea, but in that time you could squeeze in a game of hide-and-seek, do a jigsaw puzzle or build a train track instead.
“The joyous thing about summer holidays is that, as parents, we usually have some time off too which is perfect for honing our playing skills and keeping our kids entertained in those long weeks.”
The Argos research found that 44% of parents love playing games with their children. Kilbey points out: “Any play you can do jointly with them will help boost their social and emotional development and their language and communication skills.”
4. Pick play you enjoy too
Kilbey advises parents not to worry about what they play with their child, explaining: “Play comes in so many forms, so pick something that resonates with you as that will be much easier for you to engage in. Not everyone likes messy play or outdoor games, whereas others find den building and running around much more their thing. Stop worrying – your kids will be thrilled with whatever you do.”
5. Encourage solo play
While children often want to play with others or you, it’s also important for them to enjoy playing on their own, explains Kilbey. “When kids are bored, they learn to self-occupy through engaging in play, which is an essential skill as we grow up,” she says. “So encourage it and take some time for you!”
Children may sometimes need a little encouragement to play on their own, so Kilbey advises parents to model how much fun it is playing solo, like hosting a tea party with teddies and dolls.
6. Give them a challenge
Kilbey says children love being set a task with a clear outcome as “it gives them a real sense of achievement”, she explains. She suggests challenging them to something fun like gathering daisies and petals to make a potion, or finding all the purple items in their bedroom and arranging them all in a line.
7. Forget the learning curve
There are no rules on what you play with your child, and Kilbey stresses that the purpose of play is to engage in an activity for its own sake, with no clear goal or agenda.
“It’s the summer holidays, kids don’t need to be learning for a few weeks, so use this downtime away from the timetables and history coursework as an opportunity to spend time together with no clear outcome in mind.”