Jan. 02--When kids lose their way, it's mom who sets them straight.
Father, forgive us. But mama knows.
Imagine the trouble that could be avoided if only leaders could and would listen to their mothers, accepting their gifts of both wisdom and the confidence to act upon it.
Seriously. Hundreds of thousands of people in the Chicago area and beyond tried to tell Bears Chairman George McCaskey where to go and what he could do with his team's 5-11 season. Nothing happened until one voice finally was heard above the din.
His mom.
His 91-year-old mother, Virginia Halas McCaskey, was "pissed off," George said. "I can't think of a more accurate description. ... She's fed up with mediocrity. She feels that she and Bears fans everywhere deserve better."
Moms know why it's important to do things you don't want to do, when and how to cut off the crust, and when it's time to turn out the lights.
(They also tell you to mind your language. Surely, "ticked off" would have been just as accurate. Forty lashes with a wet noodle, George.)
New York Giants President and Chief Executive John Mara, digging out from his own 6-10 season, said his 85-year-old mother was not very happy with him, either. "She suffers through this probably even more so than I do," John said. "I am on notice as well."
So Ann Mara presumably wanted her son fired in November after the Giants managed to throw away a game against the lowly Jacksonville Jaguars, who finished 3-13.
"Not just after the Jacksonville game," John said.
Moms know sometimes it's necessary to pull over, stop the car and announce that you can either behave like you're expected or you can walk.
Obviously, this is not limited to pro football.
It's also not limited to sons, though the leadership ranks have tended to be predominantly male, hence more lost boys stumbling around in need of guidance and support.
Would a mother tell her son or daughter executive to ignore a safety risk or to order a recall?
What would a mother tell the head of a cable company, an airline or a bank about how customers are to be treated and charged?
A mom just might have some thoughts about elected officials who, acting like children, spend all their time complaining about each other instead of working together to actually solve problems.
To quote the Beatles, your mother should know.
It's instructive to note Kim Jong Un's mother, one of his father's mistresses, has been dead a decade and unable to tell him to mind his manners or play nice with others.
Vladimir Putin's mother reportedly died in 1998. Another woman has made noises since '99 about actually being his mother, but it's doubtful anyone is telling him to behave himself and to learn to share.
Mothers make us who we are.
"A man who has been the indisputable favorite of his mother keeps for life the feeling of a conqueror, that confidence of his success that often induces real success," said no less an authority than Sigmund Freud, according to friend, associate and official biographer Ernest Jones.
Jones wrote that Freud, the eldest of five surviving children, spoke often of how his mother's high regard gave him an "inestimable ... virtually magical advantage" in achieving greatness.
But not everyone has a mother superior, and others have shown that the opposite also can be as great a motivator.
Johnny Carson always sensed his mother preferred his sister over him and his brother. In 1967, much of the nation found his nightly monologue must-see viewing. Ruth Carson was a tougher sell, even with a Time magazine reporter in the family home to watch her watch "The Tonight Show."
The cover story opened with her muttering "That's not so funny" after her son's first joke and heading to the kitchen to make some coffee. Johnny kept at it for another 25 years, the last seven after discovering she secretly collected articles about his success.
When Richard Nixon was 10, and his mother away, he wrote her a sad little letter in which he cast himself as a somewhat abused pet.
The note addresses his mother, who could seem distant even when home, as his master and told of a series of unfortunate incidents, from bee stings to being kicked.
"I wish you would come home right now," young Nixon wrote in closing. "Your good dog, Richard."
It's this sense of abandonment, of lonely insecurity, that former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger would detect in Nixon many years and many, many achievements later.
Nixon "could have been a great, great man had somebody loved him," Kissinger told longtime White House chronicler Hugh Sidey, noting that he didn't "think anybody ever did -- not his parents, not his peers."
Mommies are, by definition, the difference between good guys and SOBs.
But let's be honest, too, that some mothers are just plain awful.
Ma Barker, the gangster, comes to mind. Casey Anthony does, too. Most of the moms connected to reality TV shows and Disney princess movies do, too. Joan Crawford is another example, though she was correct that wooden hangers, when available, are preferable to wire.
Good mamas don't let their children grow up to be babies.
They lecture them to not burn bridges, follow the golden rule, sit up straight and stand up tall.
They tell their kids to clean up their messes, go easy on the drinks, do the right thing.
And, sometimes, sons and daughters sometimes need to be told they must do better.
A 5-11 Bears team? Hidden fees? Finger pointing in Washington and Springfield?
Oh, no. We don't tolerate that. Good sons and daughters know.
Word to your mother.
philrosenthal@tribpub.com
Twitter @phil_rosenthal
