Aug. 10--For the fourth summer in a row, dozens of girls who are about to enter seventh grade will gather for a daylong workshop in Downers Grove to talk about everything from friendship complications to locker combinations.
Connecting to Ourselves for Real Empowerment (CORE), which takes place Aug. 20 at Herrick Middle School, is sponsored by a local nonprofit called Helping Girls Navigate Adolescence.
"It's amazing the role that stress plays when girls are so young," Mary Ellen Young, co-founder of HGNA, told me. "They're worried about the additional load of homework, pleasing five or six teachers instead of just one, making the team because now you have teams you have to try out for, finding your way around the school, opening your locker."
It's a lot.
Young and co-founder Cathy Fisher launched their organization in response to news reports and research on bullying and adolescent development in elementary schools.
"I remember in the summer of '02 reading a story about relational aggression in girls that described the quiet violence going on at schools," Young said. "It was one of those transformational moments where I thought, 'How come we're not talking about what to do about this, when we know that what happens in elementary school has such lifelong implications?"
Other parents shared her alarm.
"I remember reading 'Odd Girl Out' at the pool," she says, referring to Rachel Simmons' book about aggression among adolescent girls. "And people would come up to me and start talking about the trouble their girls were having."
HGNA started offering daylong Chick Chat workshops for fourth, fifth and sixth grade girls to discuss and solve some of their social and emotional challenges in a safe environment.
In 2012, they decided to expand the programming to include girls entering middle school, which begins in seventh grade in Downers Grove.
"A lot of surrounding parents of sixth graders ask if they can join, but we feel it's important that all the girls are the same age," Young said. "But if another community wanted to buy the curriculum, it certainly would relate to a sixth grader."
The program at Herrick, which costs $20, is open to any girl entering seventh grade, regardless of where she attends school.
The day is divided into three sessions: friendship, self-awareness and self-care.
Self-care, led by yoga instructors, focuses on healthy eating, the importance of moving your body and the benefits of sleep.
The self-awareness and friendship sessions are led by licensed clinical social workers, who help the girls navigate appearance, popularity, feeling accepted and countless other topics fighting for space in the adolescent mind.
"If they can take the time to reflect on who they are, they will be more self-accepting," Young said. "And if they learn about other people, they'll be more accepting of others. The foundation for empathy is being able to look at things from other people's perspective."
The girls leave with a workbook and instructions to spend time reading it.
"It teaches them about conflict resolution, making good decisions, seeking out a trusted adult," Young said. "It takes them through the journey of self-discovery -- looking at the attributes that make them who they are.
"That's really the basis of CORE," she continued. "The main task of adolescence is to develop a sense of self. The pressure to fit in often equates to being something that you're not. We want to help girls take time to reflect on who they are before they enter this world of middle school."
I would argue that the pressure to fit in never truly lets up, even decades after middle school ends. The earlier girls learn how to know and accept themselves -- and, just as important, others -- the better equipped they'll be to wade through the shark-infested waters of social media, cliques, young love and other hallmarks of adolescence and beyond.
I'd love to see a similar program offered for boys entering middle school. So would Young, who said her group has no plans to expand beyond girls, but she'd be happy to help anyone who is interested in launching a workshop series for boys.
Organizers limit the workshop to 100 girls to keep the sessions from getting too large and unwieldy. If you're interested, click here to register by Aug. 14.
hstevens@tribpub.com
