Jacob Steinberg's match report
Full time: Chelsea 3-1 Newcastle
Peep peep! That was a comfortable win for Chelsea, with Dwight Gayle’s early goal giving them a necessary alarm call. After that they were superb, particularly the attacking trio of Fabregas, Hazard and Morata. Victor Moses also had a fine game at right wing-back.
There are some tasty 3pm fixtures, and you can follow them with Barry Glendenning. Thanks for your company, bye!
90 min Three minutes.
89 min The game is petering out. Newcastle win a couple of corners, just for the road. Clark heads wide from near the penalty spot.
88 min “Rob,” says Andrew Benton. “Your world might have “disappeared so far up its own arch that it’s almost impossible to tell”, but I would think for many OBO readers the world is reasonably tickety-boo, all things considered. Do cheer up, please, it is only a game of football, after all.”
Ah, sorry Andrew, I think you may have clicked the wrong link. We offer a Happy MBM service as well.
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85 min Another Newcastle change: Merino off, Yedlin on.
84 min After some fleet-footed work on the edge of the area from Morata, Alonso’s deflected cross-shot is palmed away by Darlow.
84 min “Presumably, if Merino continues to play so well for Newcastle (65 min), fans will be flocking to see them from now on?” says Paul Gander. “Sorry, couldn’t resist.”
Don’t apologise to me, apologise to yourself.
82 min It’s been an emphatic win for Chelsea. Newcastle have worked hard but this was always going to be a tough afternoon for them.
80 min Another Chelsea change: Cahill on, Christensen off.
78 min A double change for Chelsea: Bakayoko and Willian replaces Hazard and Fabregas, who were both superb.
76 min Hazard is denied a hat-trick by a good save from Darlow. He was played in by Morata and tried again to dink the ball over the keeper, this time with his left foot. Darlow stood up and was able to beat the shot away.
75 min Jonjo Shelvey replaces Diame for Newcastle.
GOAL! Chelsea 3-1 Newcastle (Hazard 74 pen)
Hazard dinks a soft Panenka to his left, with Darlow diving the other way. Lovely stuff.
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PENALTY TO CHELSEA
Fabregas plays yet another beautiful through pass to Moses, who gets to the ball fractionally before Ritchie and is fouled. It’s a clear penalty.
72 min After a few slightly uncomfortable minutes, Chelsea are again in total control.
71 min “I am sitting in a coaching class right now learning about computer networks,” boasts Shah Abdul Ghani. “And being an ardent Chelsea supporter I’m obviously following the match on my phone. It seems like Newcastle are so bad that Rafa Benitez shouldn’t mind swapping the stadium for my classroom right now. It isn’t going to affect the game anyway and I’ll have a bit more inclination to listen to the class then.”
70 min Hazard runs at the defence and plays a short square pass to Drinkwater, who stabs an ingenious return pass with the outside of his right foot. That puts Hazard through on goal but as the ball kicks up he can’t control his shot and the ball dribbles wide. It was a gorgeous pass from Drinkwater,.
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67 min Azpilicueta clips in a cross from a narrow position that is headed towards goal by Moses, lurking around the penalty spot. Darlow plunges to his right to make a comfortable save.
65 min Merino has been good on the ball for Newcastle, particularly in the second half. There’s a calm elegance to his play.
63 min This is Newcastle’s best spell since they went ahead early on. That isn’t saying much, in truth, but there has been a slight change in the mood of the match.
62 min “As a Chelsea fan I was worried when Abramovich was firing our managers so fast it was only a matter of time before he’d have to turn to Benítez one day,” says Vaclav Smerda. “Sure enough he did after Di Matteo. Benítez was always a wrong choice for Chelsea. Simply because he was at Liverpool when we kept meeting them in the Champions League and those were tough games. Benítez and Liverpool where great opponents and it was weird seeing him at Chelsea. Anyway, I have respect for what he did over the six months. The abuse he is getting from some Chelsea fans is unnecessary and wrong.”
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61 min That’s better from Newcastle, who enjoy a sustained attack before Perez drills a low shot well wide from 25 yards. That’s Perez’s last touch; he has been replaced by Isaac Hayden.
60 min “I’m not anything close to a Chelsea fan but it seems to me Hazard gets fouled more than any other player,” says JR in Illinois. “And not just fouled a little more but like three times more. Guys just chase him around and when they can get close enough they just take hacks at him. His legs must be like hamburger.”
The best thing is that half the time he either evades the hacks or ignores them. His balance is wonderful. It reminds me of that famous George Best goal against Chelsea, when he stayed on his feet despite being run over by Chopper Harris.
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58 min “Rafa missed his Dad’s funeral so he could manage a Liverpool game,” says Nick Smith. “Genuine football man and down to earth. Also, people who dislike him are generally pillocks (Mourinho, ‘big’ Sam, Chelsea fans etc).”
Nick’s email address is available for a small fee.
57 min Fabregas’s long pass is headed down by Morata to Hazard, who does absurdly well to maintain control despite being off balance and surrounded by defenders. Eventually he stumbles and the ball runs through to Darlow. Newcastle were appealing for a handball against him as well, not that it matters now.
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56 min Hazard’s long-range shot takes a big deflection and drifts just wide of the near post. Darlow had already dived in the other direction.
53 min It feels like a matter of time until Chelsea get a third. Newcastle are scrapping hard but there’s an unsustainable desperation to their defending.
49 min “I agree with JR from Illinois (13:18 update) - no push and no foul from Morata,” says Joe in Milan. “In fact, the slow-motion replays on Sky Italia show that Mbemba stumbled as he moved to anticipate the cross. Morata reached out to help steady his opponent but there was only so much he could do - such a good bloke that Morata is, truly so. Paolo Di Canio in the Sky Italia studio has no issues with Morata’s goal, hence neither should anyone else.”
I have no idea whether people are being sarcastic any more. The world has disappeared so far up its own arch that it’s almost impossible to tell.
47 min Christensen strides forward elegantly from the back and plays a fine through pass to Moses, who should be flagged offside but isn’t. He slips a low ball into the six-yard area that is crucially cleared by Mbemba, who does well to get in front of Morata.
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46 min Peep peep! Chelsea begin the second half.
More half-time chit-chat
“The Chelsea fans who are barracking Benítez are beyond pathetic,” says Joseph Sampson. “In the six months he spent at Stamford Bridge, he completely turned our season around, qualifying for the Champions’ League and winning the Europa League in the process. The abuse originated as a show of loyalty to Mourinho, who is now similarly abused by the same Chelsea fans, possibly as a warped expression of loyalty to Rafa?”
(There’s an interesting piece to be written about why Benitez inspired either adoration or contempt, with little in between.)
“Dare I compare Morata’s contact with the defender to the contact that Ramsey felt v Burnley last Sunday?” says Roy Allen. “In my opinion, neither is a foul. In matters of judgement sometimes you win and sometimes you lose. It’s the nature of the game. I’m glad that I’m neither case we stood around for minutes whilst a VAR scrutinised the incidents. Rough, smooth, get on with it.”
(Yes, agreed. See also: the Morata foul when Phil Jones scored an own goal v Chelsea earlier in the season.)
“I’ll help you see Morata’s goal properly,” says JR in Illinois. “There was no push and no foul. His light touching of Mbemba’s back was no cause for Mbemba to collapse to the ground. Also, but unrelated, Dwight Gayle resembles Jon Stewart from the Daily Show. Really. Have a look.”
Half-time reading
Half time: Chelsea 2-1 Newcastle
Peep peep! Newcastle started superbly, only to make the mistake of taking the lead. That stirred Chelsea, who played some great stuff and took control of the game through goals from Eden Hazard and Alvaro Morata. See you in 10 minutes for the second half.
45+1 min Clark is booked for a cynical hack at Hazard.
44 min A Newcastle free-kick is half cleared to Lejeune, who contorts his body to hit a cracking volley that is deflected behind by Alonso. Nothing comes of the corner.
42 min Newcastle are hanging on to a 2-1 deficit. They really need half-time.
38 min Drinkwater slashes a decent effort wide of the far post from 25 yards. Darlow had it covered.
36 min The ball runs to Rafa Benitez, who slices it back into play to chants of “You fat bastard!” from the Chelsea fans.
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35 min Morata put hands on Mbemba just before the goal, which some referees might have deemed a foul. I can see both sides!
34 min Chelsea started slowly but since going behind they have been pretty devastating, certainly in attack.
GOAL! Chelsea 2-1 Newcastle (Morata 33)
Alvaro Morata scores yet another header. Moses, on the right, smashed a rising cross that beat everyone at the near post and left Morata with a simple header from four yards.
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31 min Moses runs at Ritchie and wins a corner, Chelsea’s fifth of the match. Nothing happens.
28 min Newcastle can’t get out. They may eventually reflect that, as at Old Trafford, the worst thing they did was score an early goal.
26 min A promising Chelsea attack ends with Fabregas is bulldozed to the floor by the referee Kevin Friend. Oh dear. It’s all Chelsea now, with Morata and Hazard full of waspish menace. They are so good to watch.
GOAL! Chelsea 1-1 Newcastle (Hazard 21)
The pressure was too much for Newcastle. Azpilicueta’s superb cross towards Morata was intercepted at the near post by the stretching Lejeune. The loose ball came to Hazard, who slammed it into the ground and over Darlow.
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20 min Christiansen hits the post! Chelsea have woken up now. A right-wing corner was worked short and played infield to Kante, who clipped a flat cross into the area. Christiansen twisted his neck to loop an excellent curling header onto the post from 15 yards.
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19 min Rudiger wafts a long pass towards Morata in the area. He controls it with his back to goal before being bumped over by Darlow, who is pretty lucky not to concede a penalty. It was a clumsy, unusual attempt to get the ball from Darlow, and maybe that helped him get away with it.
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17 min Darlow makes an excellent save. Fabregas’s superb long pass was controlled exquisitely by Hazard, who flicked the ball towards goal with his second touch. It hit the left hand of Darlow, who spread both arms wide as he flew from goal.
Chelsea have looked jittery at the back since the start and now they are behind. The ball ricocheted around on the edge of the box before Alonso poked it back towards his goalkeeper. Murphy got there first and tried to go round Courtois, who plunged to his left to push the ball away from goal. But it fell perfectly for Gayle to slide into an empty net.
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GOAL! Chelsea 0-1 Newcastle (Gayle 12)
This has been coming.
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11 min “Benitez stands out for me in the Premiership in that he isn’t your standard football manager - he’s a quiet achiever who keeps his own counsel, and who you could see managing a firm of lawyers or a council library just as well as a football team,” says Andrew Benton. “I would bet the players like him, too. What more could you want?”
I suspect not everybody would agree with that profile of him.
10 min A long pass is chested down by Hazard to Morata, who thrashes a half-volley over the bar from a ludicrous angle on the right side of the box. That was a decent effort, though Darlow had it covered.
9 min It’s been a pretty sluggish start from Chelsea, all things considered. The dawdling Azpilicueta is robbed by Perez, who lumbers into the box and drags the ball back to Merino. His sidefooted curler from 20 yards is straight at Courtois.
8 min “Ah Rob,” says Bruce Jackson. “The days of the crunching tackle. When you’d take off your shinpads after a game, and still be able to make out the mark of each individual stud in your leg. Where have those days gone?”
To Hackney Marshes?
6 min Chelsea’s first good move involves Hazard, Fabregas and finally Drinkwater, whose cutback from the left of the box is desperately cleared by the stretching Clark. At least I think it was him; the Newcastle shirt numbers are not exactly TV-friendly.
5 min “So Benitez has decided to combat the non-stop running and industry of Kante and Drinkwater with...Diame,” sniffs Shaun Wilkinson. “Any ideas what the thinking behind that could be? A two-man midfield with Diame was just strolled through by Watford, so what are Chelsea going to do with this Newcastle team? I am going to hide behind the sofa.”
I miss Jonjo Shelvey. When I saw the Newcastle team, that was my dominant emotion.
4 min It’s been a confident, aggressive start from Newcastle, with the first few minutes taking place almost exclusively in Chelsea’s half. No chances though.
1 min Peep peep! Newcastle start the match, kicking from left to right on my television screen. They are in black-and-white stripes; Chelsea are in blue.
The players are in the tunnel, the mascots are in the tunnel. It’s on!
A pre-match plug
Episode 7 is here on @acast join Lee, Rob and @FootballCliches as we talk the backpass law, an underrated Arsenal cup win, the great Barry vs Motty debate and to select our first ever Journeyman Of The Week (get your nominations in) https://t.co/VTtySSNsL8
— Nessun Dorma Podcast (@nessundormapod) November 28, 2017
If this doesn’t get you in the mood for a festival of football, nothing will
12 years to the day since Brentford and Scunthorpe played out the most your Dad sequence of events ever to take place on a professional football pitch. 9 crunching tackles in 17 seconds. pic.twitter.com/qYx6R2B6v4
— Ball Street (@BallStreet) November 26, 2017
A bit of pre-match reading
Team news
Chelsea (3-5-1-1) Courtois; Azpilicueta, Christensen, Rudiger; Moses, Fabregas, Kante, Drinkwater, Alonso; Hazard; Morata.
Substitutes: Caballero, Zappacosta, Cahill, Bakayoko, Willian, Pedro, Batshuayi.
Newcastle (3-4-2-1) Darlow; Mbemba, Lejeune, Clark; Manquillo, Diame, Merino, Ritchie; Murphy, Perez; Gayle.
Substitutes: Elliot, Yedlin, Shelvey, Hayden, Joselu, Mitrovic, Aarons.
Referee Kevin Friend.
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Preamble
Hello! Right, that’s enough of the pleasantries; let’s proceed to some rugged soccer chat. For a team who have reportedly spent most of the season in crisis, Chelsea are doing pretty well. They are through to the last 16 of the Champions League and are the form team in the Premier League (apart from Manchester City, who don’t count because they’re different).
Although Chelsea are 11 points behind City, they are in a decent position to close the gap should City show anything resembling human frailty against Manchester United and Spurs in the next couple of weeks. Chelsea, who have taken 16 points from their last six games, have a lot of exceedingly winnable fixtures between now and the end of February, including today’s match at home to Newcastle.
It’s been a rough, uncertain few weeks for Newcastle, though the excellence of their manager should keep them away from a relegation battle. Rafa Benitez returns to Chelsea for the first time since his short spell as manager in 2012-13. It probably won’t be an emotional reunion. His team will do well to get anything out of today’s game, unless somebody can channel their inner Papiss Cisse.
Kick off is at 12.30pm.
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