Solace. That’s what I’m looking for. Balm for the soul. Some sign that we might one day find ourselves on the other side of the present impenetrable shitstorm and begin to believe in truth, beauty and humanity again. Some people will find this in art, music and literature, or in doing good works. Me, I’m pinning all my hopes on Celebrity First Dates.
The great, great thing about Channel 4’s First Dates (now in its sixth series) is that it is designed to work. People who stand a good chance of getting along are put together, then everyone just sits back and hopes some alchemy will happen. It’s not cynical – it hopes for the best, while knowing you can’t force it. Even in an ordinarily bad week it’s restorative.
This time, celebrities are matched with “ordinary” people. The first episode opens with Jessica Wright from The Only Way Is Essex being paired up with Tom, a splendidly gentle hunk of personal trainer recently back from a 10-year stint in the US honing the physiques of Hollywood stars. They get on so well he even tells her about his secret passion for the canal systems of England. And narrowboats. “Like Rosie and Jim?” says Jess, because she is as keen that this should work as we are. “Yes!” says Tom delightedly. They agree to a second date. He plans to show her a narrowboat. “We can walk past one,” she says. “On the way to somewhere fun.” I am so happy, even though they change their minds later. No harm, no foul. It’s all I ask.
Things go less well between Richard Blackwood and his altogether magnificent date Diana. She doesn’t fancy him. He is faintly relieved. “She’s a 10,” he says. “I need an eight.” You see? Restorative.
Esther Rantzen and Irish legal aid lawyer John nearly make it. Then he makes a joke about her age that doesn’t quite come off. But she should reconsider. I think we could all be very happy together.
Jess and silver Paralympic medallist Will Bayley are meeting up after he’s finished competing in Rio. He thinks she’s “proper full-hearted”. She has “never met a boy like him, ever”. Shitstorm, we’re coming for ya.
