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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Entertainment
Sarah Dempster

Catchup TV: the turn-ons and turn-offs

The Genius of British Art presenters
Dr Gus Casely Hayford, Sir Roy Strong, Janet Street-Porter, Dr David Starkey, Jon Snow and Howard Jacobson present The Genius of British Art on C4.

Turn-ons

The Genius of British Art

Erudite polemic adjusts bowtie, buffs brain, sets phasers to boggle

Downton Abbey

More climactic kedgeree and miscalculated fellatio from Gosford Snark

Gardeners' World

Big shout out to MC Buckland and the GW soil posse

Giant Squid: Inside Nature's Giants Special

Monstrous marine necropsy sparks debate at Birds Eye HQ: golden breadcrumbs or crispy batter

Turn-offs

America's Next Top Model

Jenga tower of clavicles and hubris continues to repel reason/wrecking balls

Piers Morgan's Life Stories

Cufflinked tumour continues to swell in fame's coccyx; resulting vista prompts triumphant sniggers

The Mentalist

Putatively buff plod manoeuvres orange eyebrows around "plot" assembled from bits of old CSI, desiccated Monk, dust, etc

Merlin

No

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