Caroline Flack's heartbroken family have released an unpublished Instagram post the star wrote about the moment "my whole world and future was swept from under my feet" after her arrest.
The much loved Love Island presenter was due to stand trial on March 4, after being charged with assault by beating after an alleged row broke out with her boyfriend Lewis Burton at her London home in mid-December.
Caroline pleaded not guilty to the charge while her boyfriend backed her and always maintained she was innocent.
She took her own life aged 40 at her London flat on Saturday just weeks ahead of her trial.
But her mum Chris has released an unpublished Instagram post Caroline was reportedly advised not to release, in which she insisted she was not a domestic abuser and she said she was taking responsibility for the "accident".
The emotional post Caroline Flack's family shared with the Eastern Daily Press reads: "For a lot of people, being arrested for common assault is an extreme way to have some sort of spiritual awakening but for me it's become the normal.
"I've been pressing the snooze button on many stresses in my life - for my whole life. I've accepted shame and toxic opinions on my life for over 10 years and yet told myself it's all part of my job. No complaining."
She added: "The problem with brushing things under the carpet is .... they are still there and one day someone is going to lift that carpet up and all you are going to feel is shame and embarrassment."
Talking about her arrest she said: "On December the 12th 2019 I was arrested for common assault on my boyfriend ...Within 24 hours my whole world and future was swept from under my feet and all the walls that I had taken so long to build around me, collapsed. I am suddenly on a different kind of stage and everyone is watching it happen.
"I have always taken responsibility for what happened that night. Even on the night. But the truth is .... It was an accident.
"I've been having some sort of emotional breakdown for a very long time.
"But I am NOT a domestic abuser. We had an argument and an accident happened. An accident. The blood that someone SOLD to a newspaper was MY blood and that was something very sad and very personal."
She also spoke about the effect the arrest was having on her family.
"The reason I am talking today is because my family can't take anymore. I've lost my job. My home. My ability to speak. And the truth has been taken out of my hands and used as entertainment.
"I can't spend every day hidden away being told not to say or speak to anyone.
"I'm so sorry to my family for what I have brought upon them and for what my friends have had to go through."
And she fiinished the post by saying: "I'm not thinking about 'how I'm going to get my career back.' I'm thinking about how I'm going to get mine and my family's life back. I can't say any more than that."
