“A mate mentioned the impressive statistic that Liverpool have not finished lower than eighth in the league since being promoted to the old First Division in 1962. Taking the 1962-63 season as the starting point, what is the lowest position that all current Premier League teams have finished between 1963 and the present?” ask the lads at the Star and Dragon Pub, Carbondale, Illinois. “And what is the lowest any team has fallen that has played at least one season in the top division since 1962-63?”
How the mighty haven’t fallen. Liverpool have shown remarkable consistency since they were promoted to the top flight 63 years ago. They’ve finished eighth on four occasions (1962-63, 1993-94, 2011-12 and 2015-16) and are the only English team in that period never to end a season outside the top half of the top flight.
Thanks to Pete Salmon and Mike Slattery in particular for doing the work on this answer. Let’s start with the lowest positions in the league ladder achieved by the current Premier League teams.
Liverpool 8th (1962-63, 1993-94, 2011-12, 2015-16)
Arsenal 17th (1975-76)
Everton 19th (1979-80)*
Manchester United 23rd (first in second tier, 1974-75)
Tottenham Hotspur 25th (1977-78)
West Ham United 29th (1979-80)
Chelsea 40th (1982-83)
Newcastle United 42nd (1991-92)
Manchester City 47th (third in third tier, 1998-99)
Aston Villa 48th (1970-71)
Leeds United 49th (2007-08)
Nottingham Forest 51st (2005-06)
Sunderland 52nd (2019-20)
Crystal Palace 55th (1962-63)
Wolves 72nd (fourth in fourth tier, 1986-87)
Fulham 85th (1995-96)
Brentford 87th (1973-74)
Bournemouth 89th (2008-09)
Burnley 90th (1986-87)
Brighton 91st (1996-97, 1997-98)
* Everton were not relegated as there were 22 teams in the English top flight.
Fifty-eight teams have played in the top flight since Liverpool’s promotion in the summer of 1962. Six have dropped out of the Football League at some stage: Carlisle, Leyton Orient, Luton, Notts County, Oldham and Oxford. The lowest finishers of the six were Leyton Orient, who came 13th in the National League (105th overall) in 2017-18.
While we’re here, we looked at the lowest positions achieved by various European giants in the same period. Before anyone starts foaming at the exclusion of Beloved Superstars FC, we restricted it to teams who have won the European Cup/Champions League more than once. Here’s how the European Super League (Legacy Edition) looks; the big numbers are the lowest league position for each team.
6th
Barcelona 1962-63, 1964-65, 1987-88, 2002-03
Benfica 2000-01
8th
Liverpool 1962-63, 1993-94, 2011-12, 2015-16
9th
Porto 1969-70
Real Madrid 1976-77
12th
Bayern Munich 1977-78
13th
Ajax 1964-65
Internazionale 1993-94
17th
Milan 1980-81, 1982-83 (first in Serie B)
21st
Juventus 2006-07 (first in Serie B)
23rd
Manchester United 1974-75
40th
Chelsea 1982-83
51st
Nottingham Forest 2005-06
Eagles’ Wembley compilation
“I’ve now seen Crystal Palace lift four different trophies at Wembley (Zenith Data Systems Cup, Championship playoff trophy, FA Cup, Community Shield),” writes Toby Kinder. “Manchester United and Liverpool never managed the ZDS, but have both won the European Cup there, as well as all the domestic trophies, so are probably on four too. Can any other club beat that?”
Selhurst Park, Sunday, 2pm is all we have to say on this subject. “I feel bad for doing this, given the manufactured beef stirred up between our clubs this summer, but Nottingham Forest can go (at least) one better than Palace when it comes to winning different trophies at Wembley,” says Jim Hearson.
“Forest can see the Eagles’ FA Cup (1959), Charity/Community Shield (1978), Championship playoff trophy (2022) and Full Members’ Cup – both Simod and ZDS varieties (1989, 1992) – and raise them a handful of League Cups (1979, 1989, 1990).
Jim adds: “Forest were also victorious at the Wembley-held Football League Centenary Tournament in 1988 but, as they weren’t full-length matches, some uncharitable types may not wish to count it.”
Chelsea have also won five trophies at Wembley: FA Cup, League Cup, Community Shield, Full Members’ Cup … and the League South Cup in 1945. “Chelsea beat Millwall 2-0 in front of a crowd of 90,000,” writes Julian Croker. “Eight of the team were actually guest players registered to other clubs.”
Tom Solano nominates West Ham, whose five trophies were the Football League War Cup, FA Cup, Charity Shield, Cup Winners’ Cup and Championship playoff. Sadly, we can’t count the 1966 World Cup, won by a Hammers-heavy England at Wembley.
More musical company for Vincent
In the Knowledge last week we looked at footballers whose names were song titles, a question inspired by CMAT’s Vincent Kompany. Thanks to the dozens of you – we had no idea there were so many readers – who sent in some of the songs we’d missed. We’ve included links for the most popular/interesting ones, with the rest rounded up at the bottom.
Thiago Silva – Dave ft AJ Tracey
George Best – The Wedding Present
This is an album rather than a song
The Scent of Roy Keane – SHLUG
Hamish (the Goalie) – Michael Marra
A tribute to Dundee United’s Hamish McAlpine, covered here by – yep – Leo Sayer
Bob Wilson, Anchorman – Half Man, Half Biscuit
Roger Milla – Pepe Kalle
“It’s been my ringtone for years,” writes Billy. “Nothing better.”
Ich, Roque – Sportfreunde Stiller
“Roque Santa Cruz even stars in the video,” writes Jonas Jessen.
The Ballad of Paul Tierney – Lonely Tourist
“Includes the glorious lines: ‘The gaffer wants a word with you / We’re sending you on loan to Crewe’,” says Declan Kehoe.
God’s Footballer – Billy Bragg (about Peter Knowles)
Zola – Wonder Villains
“The man himself appears in the video!” writes Meabh in Belfast.
We’ve rounded up the rest below, splitting them by position to avoid one never-ending list of songs we’ll possibly never hear anyway.
Goalkeepers Kasey Keller – Barcelona | Edwin van der Sar – Dackelblut
Defenders Titus Bramble – Kruz Leone and Duppy | Julian Dicks, the Terminator – Flat Back Four | Bobby Moore Was Innocent – Serious Drinking | Joey Jones – The Declan Swans | Sliding In (Like McGrain) – Big Wednesday | Nice One Cyril – Cockerel Chorus
Midfielders Declan Rice – ODUMODUBLVCK | Paul Scholes – Yukari Fresh | (Jamie) Jamie Pollock – International Strike Force | Dele – Taco Hemingway | Bakayoko – Taco Hemingway | Roy Keane – Brame and Hamo | Gary Speed – Lars Vaular
Forwards Romário – Depth Charge | #RiyadMahrez – RK ft Sofiane & Hornet La Frappe | Ashley Barnes – Bacchus | Charlie George on Super 8 – Flyscreen | Mario Balotelli – Ruff Sqwad | Wayne Rooney – Johnny Flynn & The Sussex Wit | Johnny Rep – Mickey 3D | Drogba (Joanna) – Afro B | Hitti-litti Litmanen – Martti Servo | Messi – Neo Pistea | Kubala – Joan Manuel Serrat | Robin Friday – Mirror Pictures | When Robin Friday went to Cardiff – The Deckchairs | My Friend Cubilas (sic) – Badly Drawn Boy | Riquelme – Lukid | Eric Cantona Stomp – Superpunk | Johnny G (The Guidetti Song) – Badpojken ft Frida Green | Bergkamp – Midfield General
Manager Jurgen – Scorcher ft D Double E
Finally, Brendan Herron comes bearing information about an entire album of songs about footballers. “A couple of years back, a Belgian DJ (and amateur footballer) in Berlin by the name of Gratts asked each of his fellow DJ mates to contribute a track to a compilation album. There’s more background on this Bandcamp page.
And here is the track list in full:
Paco Buyo
Tony Yeboah
Tony Vairelles
The Flying Dutchman
Ik West Het, Philippe Albert
O Fenomeno
Discorentin Martins
Romário’s Pants
Gheorghe Boy
George Best
Clayton Blackmore
We’ll be honest, we did not expect to be finishing a section on songs named after the footballers with the words “Clayton” and “Blackmore”.
Knowledge archive
“On Sunday Scott Brown, Celtic midfielder and Scotland captain, scored against Scott Brown, Aberdeen goalkeeper,” wrote Paul Reilly in 2015. “Are there any other instances of a player scoring past his namesake?”
As Scott Walden emailed to point out, in 2012-13 Gloucester City had the pleasing combination at the back of goalkeeper Mike Green and central defender Mike Green. Confusion was always likely to be a risk and it came to a calamitous head in September in an FA Cup second qualifying round fixture against Thatcham Town.
Four minutes before the break, the Tigers were 1-0 and cruising. Then disaster struck. The Gloucester Citizen picks up the tale: “[Jack] Coventry worked some space on the left but his cross looked to be nothing more than a speculative effort. However, left-back Green and Matt Coupe got their wires crossed in trying to clear and the former poked out a foot and sent the ball past his goalkeeper and into the net.”
A bad day for Mike Green and Mike Green ended well however, with Gloucester running out 2-1 winners.
Can you help?
“Seven of the nine matches in Ligue 1 last weekend finished 1-0,” notes Liam Togher. “That’s 78% of the games. Has there ever been a more common instance of one specific scoreline in a single gameweek?”
“Shelbourne and Linfield meet in the Conference League tomorrow, just over a month after they played each other in Champions League qualifying. Has this happened before? If so, who were the first teams to play each other in two different European competitions in the same season?” asks Mad Mac.
“Every member of Tottenham’s starting XI in the Uefa Super Cup represented a different nationality: Italy, Austria, Argentina, the Netherlands, Spain, Uruguay, Portugal, England, Senegal, Ghana and Brazil. Add Lucas Bergvall for Sweden, Mathys Tel (and several PSG players) for France, players representing Morocco, Ecuador, Georgia and South Korea turning out for PSG, and unused subs from Russia, Czechia, Wales and Croatia. I make that 17 nationalities on the pitch and 21 in total. Is this the most nationally diverse football match of all time?” wonders Jack Hayward.
“While the league table on gameweek one is pretty meaningless, I do like the anomaly of a team who hasn’t played yet being comfortably mid-table with zero points. The question is, how long into a season has it ever been where the bottom three failed to score any points, so hypothetically a team who hadn’t played any games at all would still be outside the relegation zone?” wonders James Rowland.
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