Former Blackhawk Bryan Bickell woke up one recent morning and felt a shooting pain in his shoulder.
No big deal, he thought, maybe he had just slept on it the wrong way.
"It was just a little numb," said Bickell, now a member of the Hurricanes. "We thought it was a pinched nerve."
But after a couple of days, the pain didn't subside. Instead it extended to Bickell's leg. That's when he thought something more serious might be wrong.
"Everybody knows your body and what's normal, what's not normal," Bickell said. "This was definitely not normal."
After Bickell underwent various testing, doctors informed him he had multiple sclerosis, the disease in which the body's immune system attacks the central nervous system, which is made up of the brain, spinal cord and optic nerves.
Almost overnight, Bickell began a new chapter in his life, a chapter he said is filled with anxiety. But he also is hopeful that he will not have to give up playing hockey.
"I'm just uncertain," Bickell told the Tribune in a phone interview Saturday. "Knowing what's next is the biggest thing. Hopefully I can get on the ice and help my team and be safe and do my job. That's the biggest thing. Hopefully my career goes longer if I play the cards right.
"You're just scared for the other stage where I've been playing hockey for so long, and this definitely could be it. There are roads in life and this could take me down a different road."
But Bickell is hoping he can stay on the same road a bit longer.
Bickell spent parts of nine seasons with the Hawks before they traded him to the Hurricanes this offseason. There are memories _ like two Stanley Cups _ and friendships still here in Chicago with his former teammates and coaches, who are concerned for his well-being after Bickell announced he had MS on Friday.
"Tough news on 'Bicks.' Special guy and it's tough to hear something like that," coach Joel Quenneville said. "We're thinking about him and our thoughts and prayers are with him. He has a tough road ahead of him but we're thinking of Bicks."
Added captain Jonathan Toews: "Hopefully he can hang in there and find ways to stay strong despite his condition."
But Bickell said there's some good news related to his diagnosis. His doctors told him they caught the disease early in its progression and should be able to mitigate its effects to enable Bickell to return to hockey. There is no cure for MS, but there are varying degrees of severity of symptoms for those who have the disease.
"We're already in the mix with getting treated and trying to get things stabilized and neutralized so I can get back on the ice," Bickell said. "I can't guarantee the time but hopefully it's sooner than later."
Bickell was exasperated during his last year and a half with the Hawks both on and off the ice. Beginning in the 2015 Stanley Cup playoffs, Bickell developed various health problems.
At first he said he had vertigo. Then that went away. Then over the summer, he developed an ocular issue. Then that went away. It was hard to tell that these could have portended his diagnosis of MS, he said.
Bickell was frustrated that his health cut down his playing time to the point where he spent most of last season with the Hawks' AHL affiliate in Rockford. But he said he was satisfied with how the Hawks medical staff treated him during his time in Chicago.
"This could've started last week, it could've started a month ago, it could've started three years ago. I really don't know," Bickell said. "The symptoms I had before, they treated those symptoms and everything passed. We figured it out and got fixed and I was playing again. It felt fine. Six, seven months later we're here and it was nothing like I had before. It was a different degree of symptoms."
Symptoms Bickell is hopeful he can manage going forward.
Bickell said multiple teammates reached out to him Saturday to see how he was doing and said it was comforting to hear their kind words and those of fans on social media.
"It's nice to see how many people really care and are supporting me," Bickell said.
It has helped Bickell deal with one of the most difficult moments of his life, but one he is confident he can overcome.
