Something has stirred beneath the streets of Manhattan, and it might just take more than the efforts of New York’s finest squad of all-female Ghostbusters to get it back in the heavily steaming titanium box. Paul Feig’s controversial comedy looks set to be a palpable hit at the domestic box office this weekend after picking up strong reviews. That’s despite the best efforts of the “men’s rights” haters, whose Machiavellian plotting in a bare-faced attempt to sabotage the movie have extended to the nefarious extremes of … ahem … posting negative comments on reviews and concocting dodgy Reddit threads.
Meanwhile, over at Sony the team at newly formed unit Ghost Corps are limbering up for a whole slew of spooky sequels, spin-offs and revamps, if producer and former studio CEO Amy Pascal is to be believed. So where should film-makers go next to ensure the Twitter trolls keep spluttering into their popcorn? Here are a few ideas we think should be top of the bro-baiting slate.
OG’s (Original Ghostbusters)
Bringing back Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd and Ernie Hudson (Harold Ramis died in 2014) might not look at first glance like a recipe for upsetting the bros. But the belated sequel could twist the knife by … shock, horror! … elevating the 1984 movie’s original female castmembers to equal billing.
Such a move makes perfect sense. Sigourney Weaver is surely a bigger star than any of her former castmembers (with the possible exception of Murray) these days, and she and Annie Potts have by far the best cameos in the new movie. So why not bring back Dana Barrett and receptionist Janine Melnitz as fully paid-up members of the team this time around, thereby reminding audiences that 2016 Ghostbusters ain’t afraid of no women?
Trollbusters
Picking up where Paul Feig’s new film leaves off, a followup could delve even more deeply into the realms of meta. One of Ghostbusters’ funniest scenes riffs off the unpopularity of the film’s first trailer, which became the most disliked of all time on YouTube earlier this year. So how about a sequel in which the new quartet are charged with taking down an infestation of troll-like supernatural creatures with underdeveloped social skills and an addiction to internet forums? The main villain this time around could be a giant, cheeto-stained bro striding through the Manhattan skyline while posting mean comments on Twitter.
A Kevin spin-off
Let’s face it, the only bro-friendly character in Feig’s movie is Chris Hemsworth’s ditzy receptionist. He may be a bit dim, but the Aussie administrator has a healthy propensity for casual misogyny, is built like a dunny and maintains a stubborn, Trump-like refusal to engage with the facts. In short, he’s a hero to men’s rights advocates everywhere! Consequently, the next Ghostbusters movie needs to dash all bro hopes by revealing that Kevin enjoys nights in with the girls watching Pitch Perfect and has been to see The Vagina Monologues 12 times.
Ghostbusters vs Mad Max
The new Ghostbusters movie inexplicably sidelined bros in favour of a lady quartet, while last year’s Mad Max: Fury Road allowed Charlize Therone’s one-armed Imperator Furiosa to “bark orders” at Tom Hardy’s macho road warrior. Sacrilege! So why not bring both together for a supernaturally themed post-apocalyptic road movie in which poor Max is cruelly henpecked from all corners while the women get on with the business of clearing the desert of nasty spooks?
Brobusters
Sony once considered the idea of a fresh, all-male team of Ghostbusters, featuring real manly men such as Chris Pratt (he shoots guns!), Channing Tatum and no women whatsoever. Manna from heaven for the lady haters, you might think. But if Tatum’s 21 Jump Street franchise is allowed to cross over with Men in Black, why can’t Ghostbusters go up against the Hollywood A-lister’s own Magic Mike series?
With expectant bros nestled in at their local multiplex, awaiting the chance to finally see some Ghostbusters with actual XY chromosomes in action, the opening scene could reveal that the new team are in fact (wait for it) sexy male strippers who are only dressed in jumpsuits and proton packs! Naturally the plot should then unfurl to allow the ersatz crew of supernatural detectives to be accidentally mistaken for the real thing, and forced into a rip-roaring, spirit-spiting adventure. Sadly, bro-types would long since have left the theater in disgust.
