A young woman who says she is getting married in March has opened up about her decision not to allow her parents to bring along their 'throuple partner' to her wedding, a decision they did not take well at all. Her parents are described as being 'free spirits' who 'didn't want to settle down and raise a child', and she isn't close to them.
The bride-to-be was therefore raised by her maternal grandparents, who she regards as her real parents, and would only see her mum and dad every few months or so growing up. Eventually, they stopped visiting altogether.
Initially, she hadn't even wanted to invite her parents but agreed to include them after her grandfather stepped in and asked whether her mother could attend.
Taking to Reddit, the anonymous 27-year-old bride wrote: "About a week ago I spoke with my biodad. He wants a plus one on their invitation. I have not seen him in years so I thought maybe they had another kid and hadn't mentioned it.
"Nope. Apparently, he and my mother have a man in his 30s that is a part of their relationship. While neither myself nor my fiancé is particularly religious, and I have no objections to polygamous relationships in general, I would prefer not to have to deal with that at my wedding."
She continued: "I told him that he and my mother were invited as a courtesy and that they had no parental privileges for me to consider. He said that excluding their partner was mean and that he wouldn't have left me with my grandparents if he knew they were going to raise me to be prejudiced.
"I have spoken with my grandparents about this. Both sets. Nobody knew anything about this. So it seems that they were going to use my wedding to introduce this guy to the families."
After calling her father back she was 'very firm', with him about the way things would go, explaining she had spoken with her wedding coordinator to ensure no uninvited guests would turn up unannounced, and that they would be escorted off the property if necessary.
Having not taken this well at all, her parents have since complained widely about this, and her mother has even 'screamed' at her for 'telling people her private business'.
One fellow Reddit user wrote: "This doesn’t sound like it’s about a prejudice about polyamory so much as it’s about not wanting some random stranger at your wedding. And not owing your parents anything, they’re lucky they’re getting an invite at all."
Another advised: "Ignoring the polyamorous angle for a moment, it sounds like your parents are trying to upstage your wedding; that's crass all by itself, and a legitimate reason for you to decide you don't want them there.
"They're not there to celebrate you; they're there to tell people about their latest excitement. Tell them they can send holiday cards to everyone announcing the happy expansion but your wedding day is about your wedding."
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