Blame Brexit for whatever you like, but you can’t deny that it’s made knowing what to dress up as for Halloween a bit easier. With 31 October set (for now) as the new date by which Britain will leave the EU, it’s a dead cert that you, your children and all your friends are going to have a Brexit-themed Halloween party. Here are all the costume ideas you’ll need:
Theresa May
There will be countless Theresa Mays this Halloween, all of them dressed in a grey wig, some sensible formalwear and a big blue coat. If you want to stand out, you’re going to need to set yourself apart with your commitment to detail. Will you ignore everyone? Will you keep threatening to leave the party, then never actually leave? Will you make a decision that decimates the Halloween party, and all future Halloween parties to come for a generation? Yes? Wonderful. Go for it.
Donald Tusk
A nice suit. Some fake tan. A nondescript haircut. A habit of saying and doing things that makes everyone secretly wish you were their dad. Bingo: you’re European council president Donald Tusk.
Perfidious Albion on speed
For the too-clever-by-half types, why not dress as pro-Brexit Tory MP Mark Francois’s new favourite catchphrase? It doesn’t really matter how you approach this one. You could dress as Augustin Louis de Ximénès, the 18th-century French playwright who coined the phrase “perfidious Albion”. Or Frédéric Bastiat, who used the term in The Candlemakers’ Petition. You could even dress as the Le Parisien article that brought la perfide Albion back into modern usage in 2016. Either way, you get to take a lot of speed, which is probably something we’ll all need by October.
The literal concept of Brexit
This one is easy. On one half of your body, wear all the finest European garments you can find – a beret, a lederhosen, maybe a clog – and then somehow represent post-Brexit Britain on the other side. True, this will require you to cobble together a costume from nothing but tinned food, lorry queues and the faded memory of readily available insulin – but you’re resourceful, aren’t you?
Literally just some gammon
If all that seems like too much fuss, why not just pop over to Tesco Express, buy a bunch of ham, attach it to your face and run around the place screaming about Tommy Robinson and/or the will of the people? Congratulations: you’re now a Question Time audience member.
