Tonytown's wire fences kept demonstrators out last week, Willieville's keep them in this week. Swivel-eyed Europhobes, hangers and floggers, tweedy fox hunters, heavily subsidised farmers and angry shopkeepers strut their stuff in the Tory fiefdom. There is no whiff of power, however, no indication they really believe they might win the election. A lifesize cardboard cut-out of Tony Blair was auctioned off in Brighton for £275. The highest bid for a virtual William Hague? £5.
Hague has at least one genuine admirer (spin doctors insist Ffion is another) in the shape of Nigel, his dad. Pop Hague sauntered over to the Politico's book stall to buy three copies of a flattering biography of his son. That is one more than Michael Heseltine sold all day.
Lager costs £3 a pint in Willieville, 25p more than in Tonytown and equivalent to £5.28 a litre or £24 a gallon. Food prices have also gone up, a tenner being added to the Royal Bath hotel's fixed dinner menu that cost £30 a fortnight ago when the Lib Dems were in town and is now £40. Perhaps they do have more money than sense.
The Tories have won one poll against Labour. In Tonytown at Brighton, 9.18am was the earliest the Scotch Whisky Association was asked for a free sample. In Willieville, one representative developed a thirst at 9.04am. Hague is reformed, however. Asked if he was going for a pint, he yelled "yes" before holding up a solitary finger.
Lady Thatcher received a spic and span welcome yesterday from Tory bigwigs. Before she walked on stage yesterday, an official was sent out to hoover the blue carpet.
