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Marina Urman

Body Language Expert Explains What Makes Travis Kelce Stand Out From Taylor Swift’s Past Loves

Body language expert Judi James explained why she believes Taylor Swift has finally found “The One” in Travis Kelce.

Judi told the Daily Mail that Taylor’s body language with many of her exes suggested she was making herself smaller around them, as if to match their comparatively lower levels of success.

Taylor and Travis announced their engagement on Tuesday after two years of dating. Photos from the garden proposal broke the record of the most reposted Instagram post in just six hours.

Before dating the NFL star, Taylor had several high-profile relationships, including with Joe Alwyn, Harry Styles, and Calvin Harris.

A body language expert explained why Taylor Swift’s previous exes weren’t a great match for her
Couple embracing closely in a garden, showcasing affectionate body language that makes Travis Kelce stand out.

Image credits: Taylor Swift

According to Judi, the Love Story singer previously dated men who were similar in height to her but whom “she often eclipsed professionally,” leading her to adopt “compensatory rituals” in her body language when she was around them.

Taylor used to be what Judi described as a “chameleon dater,” someone who “suppresses their own confidence and individuality to create a false fit with the person they’re dating.”

Image credits: Taylor Swift

Having become world-famous at a young age, the singer appeared to “lower her own status signals, which can be an attempt to boost [her exes’] egos rather than her own.”

Unlike her exes, Travis doesn’t display body language associated with insecurity or lack of interest in the pop star, Judi explained. Nor does Taylor seem to adjust her style to match his or make herself smaller.

The Grammy winner recently announced her engagement to NFL star Travis Kelce

Image credits: Taylor Swift

Analyzing their engagement photos, the expert noted, “Travis is seen on his knees at her feet, clutching the ring and gazing up into her face in a very happy state of compliance and expectation. He shows no sign of wanting to assert his own fame status here or to flex his macho credentials.”

Meanwhile, Taylor looks “very much in control” as she “towers over him, looking down and touching his face as though offering loving reassurance.”

Image credits: Taylor Swift

She explained: “Most normal engagement photos show the woman a few feet away from the man in a state of relief and excitement at the proposal, but here we see a very confident, calm Taylor pressed close to a rather nervous-looking Travis.

“Travis is a big guy but Taylor’s touch rituals make him look like a besotted teen and she even closes her eyes as she smiles in a maternal-looking gesture of affection.”

The Super Bowl champion “clearly feels unthreatened” by Taylor’s successful career, said expert Judi James

Image credits: Travis Kelce
Image credits: Travis Kelce

The 35-year-old Chiefs player, a three-time Super Bowl champion, “clearly feels unthreatened” by Taylor’s long and successful career. What’s more, his body language suggests he “cherishes” his fiancée’s accomplishments.

Taylor was previously in a six-year relationship with British actor Joe Alwyn, whom she reportedly met at the 2016 Met Gala.

The two kept their relationship very private, with Taylor sneaking into his The Favourite premiere and the couple avoiding red carpet appearances together.

With ex-boyfriend Joe Alwyn, Taylor “suppressed her own confidence and individuality to create a false fit”

Image credits: Jackson Lee/GC Images

Joe and Taylor broke up in 2023. Sources said the split was “not dramatic” and that the relationship had simply “run its course.”

According to Judi, Taylor often tried to “twin” with Joe, forcing herself to mirror his reserved nature, which contrasts with the behavior she displays now.

In photos from that relationship, she frequently looked down, as if avoiding the paparazzi, and often wore muted tones compared to the brighter looks she’s been seen in with Travis.


“While Taylor has shown with Travis that she adores showboating a romantic relationship for the cameras, having fun and being playful together, a date with Joe seemed to involve signals of being way too cool to pose for the press,” Judi told The Daily Mail.

“She’s now swapped that shy downward glance (…) for a confident, relaxed air of happy enjoyment plus a love of wearing the brightest shades of red.”

DJ Calvin Harris displayed “cold and impassive” body language when he was around Taylor, Judi said

Image credits: Kevin Winter/BMA2015/Getty Images

Before meeting Joe, the Lover singer was in a relationship with music producer Calvin Harris. The two were seen kissing at the 2015 Billboard Music Awards but unexpectedly broke up after a year of dating.

At the awards show, Calvin’s body language was “cold and impassive.” When they were together in the crowd, Taylor appeared in a self-diminished pose, which “occurs when someone tries to look smaller than they are” and is “usually prompted by fear or anxiety.”

Judi noted that Taylor changed her style while dating Calvin, wearing a white catsuit with a plunging neckline to align with his DJ public persona.

Singer Harry Styles “ignored” Taylor and looked like a “very reluctant date,” according to the expert

Image credits: David Krieger/Bauer-Griffin/GC Images

The body language expert observed a similar dynamic with singer Harry Styles, whom Taylor dated from November 2012 to January 2013.

“She put in maximum effort here to create a ‘fit,’ swapping prom-queen for distressed casuals and serious knitwear but Harry always looked like a very reluctant date,” she explained.

The former One Direction singer “ignored” his girlfriend during their date at the Central Park Zoo, “slouching, scowling and unsmiling while she trotted along behind him with her hands stuffed into her pockets.”

In addition to Taylor’s engagement, fans are buzzing about the release of her 12th studio album, The Life of a Showgirl, which she recently announced on Travis’ New Heights podcast.

The album, conceived during the European leg of her Eras Tour last year, is set to be released on October 3.

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