I think mine's better ... William Hague and Charles Kennedy in front of a portrait of Tony Blair by Jonathan Yeo. Photograph: Martin Argles
It feels oddly surprising that there is, as yet, no official portrait of Tony Blair, saturated as we are with photographs, cartoons and, oh yes, those billions and billions of words devoted to the man. But apparently so: even the National Portrait Gallery has yet to commission a likeness, which seems a touch laggard given that he's likely to be out of No 10 and on the after-dinner speaking circuit in a matter of weeks.
It's less surprising - if still faintly ironic - that the reason Mr Blair has reputedly refused to sit is that it was deemed not to fit with his image. One can imagine all those teenage policy wonks going grey at the idea, lest some kind of periwigged Louis XIV version end up on the front page of the Mail. Keeping us dunces in the media on a tight leash is one thing; keeping tabs on a painter, as Clemmie Churchill discovered, is significantly more tricky.
But things are changing, which implies that Mr Blair has been forced to think about how the hand of history might render his likeness on canvas. Cherie has reportedly been tasked with assembling names, among them James Lloyd (who famously painted Paul Smith), Jennifer McRae (you know, that one of Michael Frayn), Ishbel Myerscough (Helen Mirren), Tai-Shan Schierenberg ( John Mortimer), Paul Benney, Brendan Kelly and Jonathan Yeo - who at least has expertise in the Blair area, and has also painted Murdoch.
Naturally they're all, with the possible exception of Brendan Kelly, competent but predictable NPG stalwarts. It's the image-management thing again, isn't it? Which leads us to wonder who should be parachuted in to do the job properly?
For the sake of plausibility let's restrict ourselves to artists currently alive, but there are plenty of other options, even among the Brits. Hockney would be guaranteed to see the funny side; the Chapmans could big up the grotesquerie; maybe Rachel Whiteread could cast whichever room it is in No 10 where they keep that infamous sofa government.
Personally I'd love to see what demons Lucien Freud could squeeze out of Blair's soul - though it's a close-run thing between commissioning him to provide the definitive likeness and our very own Steve Bell, who must surely be waiting anxiously for the official call to come through any moment now.
But over to you. Come up with a really fine suggestion and we could even post it as a petition on the No 10 website, couldn't we?
