LOS ANGELES _ Believe what you want, listen to everyone make nice, trust that it's going to be strictly a contest of helmets and pads and two historic football teams, but understand one very human truth.
Lane Kiffin began trolling USC about Saturday's game with Alabama nearly eight months ago.
You remember it now, right? Of course you do.
Kiffin is still the pebble in the sockless loafer of Trojans fans, rattling around in there for about three years now, digging into the softest skin at the most uncomfortable times, and the former USC coach poked again last winter from his perch as Alabama's offensive coordinator.
During an interview before January's national title game, Kiffin was asked about his former assistant, Clay Helton, and he just couldn't help himself.
"This morning my son Knox says, 'Hey, Daddy, we're going to be in Dallas and we're going to whip USC next year,'" he said. "I didn't think about it, but now that I think about it, I can't help Clay."
Funny, but nobody had asked about the USC game. Kiffin just rolled the subplot out there, wound it up, and giggled as it started ticking.
People who know Kiffin know there are all sorts of emotions involving USC that are hidden beneath that boyish exterior _ anger, remorse, revenge _ all ready to spill out Saturday on the sidelines of the season opener at AT&T Stadium.
The oversized white visor will be bobbing. The baggy white jacket will be billowing. With every Tide roll, Kiffin will be fist pumping. With every big Trojans stop, Kiffin will be hiding behind that giant white play card and scowling.
As he said in January, he's still mad about being canned in September 2013 by Pat Haden in the middle of the night in an airport waiting room. He still feels he was the fall guy for a program stripped bare by NCAA sanctions, and is still proud of his 28-15 record under challenging circumstances.
"It was really difficult to deal with," he said about what he called the lowest point in his professional career.
The Trojans fans watching all this angst will have to gulp hard and hope for the best, because the alternative is the absolute worst.
If 20th-ranked USC can somehow slow top-ranked and defending champion Alabama, cut into that double-digit point spread, make it respectable, maybe even pull off a monumental upset, then its fans can walk away with relieved smiles and the comforting notion that, whew, Kiff is still nutty Kiff.
But if Alabama wins big? If Kiffin's offense dominates a team that still has 19 players who played for him? If Kiffin's schemes outsmart a staff that still has five coaches who worked for him? It will not only be hard to watch, but raise interesting questions.
Was getting fired by USC the best thing ever to happen to Kiffin? And did the firing push USC down a wild slide that resulted in three coaching changes and the retirement of an athletic director in less than three years?
There is no question that Kiffin, while a brilliant offensive mind, was unsuited to be the head coach of a major college football team back then. His firing was oddly timed, but perfectly justified.
However, since then, there is also no question that Kiffin has gotten the better end of the deal.
Since Kiffin was fired after a blowout loss at Arizona State, USC has a record of 24-12, with bowl games in San Diego and Las Vegas.
Since Kiffin was hired as boss of Alabama's offense, the Tide are 26-3 with one national title and two College Football Playoff appearances.
Since Kiffin left town, the Trojans have watched Ed Orgeron walk away in a huff, Steve Sarkisian get pushed out before filing a lawsuit, and Pat Haden retire.
Meanwhile, Kiffin has guided an offense that scored 83 points in last season's two playoff games, 84 points in two games against rival Auburn, and won begrudging respect from grouchy coaching great Nick Saban.
Kiffin has actually worked his way back into becoming a serious top-program head coaching candidate again, while USC has gone back to the basics with the strait-laced Helton. With the Trojans' tough schedule, Helton would be doing well to match the eight wins recorded by Kiffin in his first year, 2010.
So, yeah, Saturday's game could be both fascinating and frustrating, even for the players _ especially some of the older players.
Asked by Los Angeles Times reporter Jesse Dougherty about Kiffin, veteran Trojans lineman Zach Banner wished his former coach well. But asked for a positive memory, he made it quick.
"He had good visors," Banner said before walking away.
Kiffin wasn't a good fit as a USC boss, but he's a perfect fit as an Alabama assistant. Even his quirky quotes are kept in check by Saban's rule that he can speak to the media only once during the regular season. That happened earlier this month, during a training camp news conference, where he was asked about the USC game.
"I know this sounds strange. I really have not thought a lot about it; you'd think that I have," Kiffin said, adding, "Now, later on, that week when we get into it, I'm sure there will be some different feelings and emotions."
You know he's thinking about it now, and he's not the only one.
"I've been around the game a long time and two of the most brilliant men I've ever been associated with are Lane Kiffin on offense and Clancy Pendergast on defense," Helton said at Pac-12 Conference media days. "So to see that chess match, see it played out, I wish sometimes I could just have a box of popcorn and watch it."
Lane Kiffin would love to butter it. Trojan fans can hope they don't choke on it.
