He was the boy who refused to grow up, according to friends. Ben Duncan was a socialite, erstwhile reality TV star and university pal of Prince William and Kate Middleton. He died aged 45 last Thursday after falling seven floors from the rooftop bar of the Trafalgar St James hotel. The bar has sweeping views of the city and has plastic barriers around its perimeter as a safety precaution. Police have said that his death was “unexpected but non-suspicious”.
In a statement to the Daily Mail, police said: “Officers responded to concerns for a man on the roof of a building in Cockspur Street, Westminster at 23:02 hours on Thursday, 30 October.
“The man sadly fell from height. Despite the best efforts from the London Ambulance service, he was sadly pronounced dead at the scene.”
Those who knew Ben agreed he belonged to a bygone era. “He both sounded and dressed like he was from another time,” one friend told The Standard. “There was also something timeless about his charm. He made you feel like you were the only person he wanted to see at a party, was extravagant with his compliments and always called the next day to mull things over.
“A great inviter - nothing made him happier than getting people together – I will miss him so much.”
“He lived life as a Peter Pan,” wrote broadcasting executive Mike Hollingsworth in a tribute to his “dear, dear friend” on Facebook. “He will be sorely missed by his many, many friends, who grew to love his charm, his wit, his infectious laugh and his innate sense of style.”
Duncan was born in April 1980 and attended public school, followed by St Andrew’s University, where he was in Prince William and Kate Middleton’s circle. In an interview with American outlet E! News in 2011, he remembered William as “social” but “very low key” in their university days, while Kate was a classic product of boarding school. “She's what we in Britain call a 'jolly holly sticks girl',” he said. “She was always at a sports game, she was always organizing, she's a natural leader. She was always in charge of something."
In 2010, aged 30, he was a contestant on Series 11 of Big Brother, the final series to air on Channel 4. Duncan was booed by the live audience as he entered the Big Brother house on account of his plummy RP accent. At the time he said he was middle class with some upper class values, but insisted he wasn’t a snob. Duncan began to charm other contestants with his dry sense of humour and clownishness. In one episode, a fellow contestant tried – and failed – to teach him how to do star jumps. He also had flirtatious friendships with both male and female housemates on the show. He was evicted after 52 days. In a tribute on Instagram, Big Brother’s series 11 winner Josie Gibson described him as “one of the most unique, dry witted and hilariously funny guys I know.”
Following his Big Brother stint, Ben trod the path of a minor reality TV star. He appeared on the impossibly dated ITV show Ladette to Lady, where “sexually shameless, binge drinking, antisocial rebels”, aka Ladettes, went to a finishing school to be taught elocution lessons, flower arranging and other etiquette essentials. Ben was one of the “eligible bachelors” at a an “elegant garden party” where the ladettes were supposed to show off their new found ladylike skills. He also appeared on shows like Come Dine With Me and Celebrity Coach Trip.
He acquired some famous pals including The Prince of Darkness, Peter Mandelson. "They became friends and Ben was proudly showing off Mandy's mobile number," a friend told The Telegraph in 2010. “They hit it off." He was a regular on the social circuit and knew people like Nicky Haslam, who described him as “the one with all the hair”. He was also friends with former Tory cabinet minister and fellow TV star Michael Portillo.
After William and Kate’s engagement in October 2010, Ben’s candid offerings on their St Andrew’s days were a goldmine for journalists. In one interview, he remembered how Prince William’s “eyes were like stalks” when he saw Middleton sashay down the catwalk in the famous see-through black dress at a university fashion show. “She brushed by him on the way to the catwalk and things were never the same again - the whole history of the monarchy had been altered,” he declared.
Following the Royal Wedding in 2011, American channel TLC aired a one-hour special documentary called “Crazy About Pippa”, which Duncan made a cameo on as a class commentator. “The Middletons represent something we’ve never experienced before among the higher echelons of British society. They are a close, nuclear, genuinely happy family – and that’s something we haven’t seen before,” he observed.
Despite the lowbrow reality TV gigs, Ben’s taste was far more erudite and his conversation was rich with cultural and historical references. His favourite artists were John Singer Sargent and William Orpen.
Following his death, friends reflected that Ben felt out of touch with modern mores. “Ben felt that society was moving in a way that he couldn't accept,” wrote Hollingsworth on Facebook. Another remarked on “how disillusioned he’d become with world politics and the so-called new world order.”
He lived in Marylebone and was described by one friend as a “stalwart of the West End community”, helping to gather signatures to save the Curzon cinema in Mayfair.
In 2010, Ben was asked by an interviewer what his motto was. “Anything can be forgiven as long as someone is interesting,” he said. By all accounts, he was a man of his word.
