On July 30, my school decided to host an alumni meet. One thing led to another, and I ended up in a WhatsApp group with 154 of those who passed the 10th standard from the institution in 1997.
By now above the age of 40, we tried to recollect our childhood. The reminiscence itself is the journey. We are not the same children. Over 25 years, we acquired scars and stars which make us recognisable and not.
I had been a resident in the school since the age of four. All my childhood, I spent in the school. I cannot separate my childhood and the school. I grew up in the comfort and brotherhood within its boundaries.
Of all my batch mates, I do not recollect more than 10 to 15, who are mostly my friends from the hostel. Let alone others, I am yet to find myself in the school group photos.
But all of us have shared memories of the infrastructure, teachers, staff, events and incidents. That lit up the WhatsApp group in no time. The shared memories connected us so tightly that it mattered little that not all of us know one another. The otherwise strangers started interacting because we had a shared past and memory.
I am still a silent spectator who finds joy in skimming through the posts in the group every day. Early on, I thought the group would die down soon, after some discussions on socio-political fault lines. The activity would stop soon. Else, the everyday chores would ensure a natural death. I was proven wrong. Even after three months, the group still clocks more than 1,000 messages a day.
I was more surprised by the way we evolved and did not, over a quarter century.
Many of us live a lonely life away from the hometown — out in the sea, desert and glass buildings. The group is the place where we can afford to be children again, leaving behind work and family. We take extreme liberties to play pranks on, and make fun of, one another. Sometimes it crosses the limits, and the “bouncers” take over to restore order. At times, people hibernate or go inactive. We realise that we remain the same even at the age of 40.
We recollect one teacher mercilessly beating and harassing us. We still love him and consider his early death a lose. We do not want our children to have such a teacher. There are teachers from whom we want more.
A few remember some incidents vividly. Mostly bad memories where we did not do any wrong. While we have a lot of good memories, scars left by some wounds would not leave us. Many forgave and moved on, a few of us still cannot.
Autographs opened another paradox. Our immaturity was expected. But it was something else. Both boys and girls had wished girls that they find a “loving husband” and become a “good mother and grandmother”. While we have a grandmother in the group, we were quick to realise the absurdity of our thoughts then. A few of us got disgusted that society ingrained such narrow-minded thoughts in us so early on.
There are many who struggled to find a partner arranged by their family. There are a lot who married in less than a month after their parents decided on the partner, without any opportunity to participate in the decision.
There are a few who cannot leave behind their cherished romances and another few who are yet to find a partner.
We can see a glimpse of the “Great Indian Kitchen” — women tirelessly cooking for their families. Voice notes are filled with sounds of chopping, washing and utensils. Rarely we see men “indulging” in cooking.
It seems daily exercise is the privilege of the men. There are hardly any women who exercise.
Music, chocolates, snacks, exotic foods and destinations are always hot topics for discussion. Anything that takes us away from the mundane life is most welcome. Karaoke singing is both heaven and hell. We are tolerant!
The career paths our friends had were surprising. Against our expectations, friends achieving more and less intrigued us. Choices they made, chances they took and surprises they had all played major role in their careers.
A select few are very close to “self-actualisation”, wondering “Who am I?” Not able to reason such thoughts, others quickly keep it aside for more mundane things.
Many show great agility in their responses with one-liners, “company-owned” stickers and GIFs. No dearth of fun even late in the night. When some of us go to bed, others wake up. We have a clubhouse that never sleeps!
Let me go back and check the group!
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