They’re still playing in Barcelona. You will believe the score!
Full time: Bayern Munich 4-1 Chelsea
Peep peep! Bayern Munich will play Barcelona or Napoli in the quarter-final on Friday after another hugely impressive performance. Robert Lewandowski scored two and made two, and I pity the fools who have to face this lot in Portugal over the next fortnight. They are quite magnificent.
90 min Davies is going off injured, so Bayern are down to 10 men. It looks like a precaution rather than a cause of national despair in Canada.
88 min Bayern have won the European Cup five times: 1974, 1975, 1976, 2001, 2013. Use this statistic while you still can.
87 min In the 2019-20 season, Chelsea have conceded 78 goals in all competitions.
85 min “Hi Rob,” says Kishalay Bannerjee. “A huge shame that the Ballon D’or has been cancelled this year. Lewandowski would have been a near certainty, in my opinion.”
I don’t really understand why they cancelled it as it’s never based on domestic football anyway. They could have followed the usual procedure: pick the best player from the European champions and make them runner-up to Lionel Messi.
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GOAL! Bayern 4-1 Chelsea (agg: 7-1; Lewandowski 83)
Robert Lewandowski gets his 53rd goal of the season. Odriozola burst down the right and angled a cross to the far post, where Lewandowski powered a downward header back across goal and into the net. That’s a majestic finish.
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81 min A Chelsea change. Tammy Abraham off, Olivier Giroud on.
80 min Bayern’s final change. Javi Martinez comes on for the ever excellent Serge Gnabry.
79 min Hudson-Odoi’s shot is blocked by Goretzka, and then James shoots straight at Neuer from 25 yards.
77 min One goal, two assists: it’s been a good night’s work for Robert Lewandowski.
That was awful defending from Chelsea. Lewandowski, found on the left wing by Gnabry, had an age to line up a cross with his left foot. He cpicked out Tolisso, who was criminally unmarked six yards from goal and twisted his body like a piece of Playdoh to sidefoot a volley through Caballero.
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GOAL! Bayern 3-1 Chelsea (agg: 6-1; Tolisso 76)
Chelsea won’t be getting an equaliser on the night.
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75 min Chelsea’s attitude has been excellent. It would have so easy to throw the towel in, especially when they went 5-0 down on aggregate. Instead they are still pushing for an equaliser on the night.
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73 min At the other end, Reece James swishes a nice long-range shot with the outside of the foot that goes a few yards over the bar.
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71 min Coutinho, 25 yards from goal, whips a lovely, trademark curler that dips onto the roof of the net.
70 min Two more changes for Bayern. Kimmich and Thiago, who were both on yellow cards going into the game, are replaced by Alvaro Odriozola and Corentin Tolisso.
70 min Barkley’s free-kick hits the wall.
68 min Thiago fouls Barkley on the edge of the D. He’s a bit lucky not to be booked, especially as it would have ruled him out of the quarter-final.
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67 min The second corner leads to a free header for Thiago, whose effort is blocked on the six-yard line by Barkley.
66 min A Bayern corner isn’t properly cleared by Chelsea, and Lewandowski volleys a dangerous cross on the turn that hits Zouma and deflects past the far post for another corner.
65 min Coutinho’s first main contribution is a gorgeous pass inside James for Davies, whose cutback is cleared by Zouma at the near post.
64 min A double change for Bayern: Boateng and Ivan Perisic are replaced by Niklas Sule and Philippe Coutinho. Boateng wasn’t limping as he came off, so Bayern will hope he’s okay for Friday.
61 min Davies meepmeeps to the byline and curls over a nice cross to Muller, who volleys into the ground and over the bar from eight yards. That was a really good chance, though I think he was put off by Zouma missing an attempted header at the near post.
60 min Boateng is going to continue, which is surprising and, in the circumstances, a bit bizarre. He must be certain it was an impact injury rather than a muscular problem.
59 min “As someone who warmed up to DRS late in cricket, I thought VAR should be given a proper crack,” says Digvijay Yadav. “I’ve seen enough now. Bin it, I say.”
It’s too late. As Tony Soprano said, you can’t put that stuff back in the donkey.
58 min This is very bad news for Bayern. Jerome Boateng has pulled something while diving to head the ball back to Neuer, and he won’t be able to continue. More importantly, he looks doubtful for Friday’s quarter-final against Barelona or Napoli.
55 min “Following the progress reports on our Canadian youngster Alphonso ‘Fonzie’ Davies with sheer delight,” says Ernest Harder. “His showing on the world stage of soccer is enhancing profile and interest in the game in Canada immensely.”
He is so much fun to watch, with such an infectious attitude to life, never mind football. We know all about his physical qualities – meep meep! – but Glenn Hoddle, commentating on BT Sport, made the excellent point that the timing of his runs from left-back is so mature for a teenager. He is frighteningly good for a 19-year-old.
53 min Zouma makes an heroic, John Terryish block from Davies’s shot, which seemed to be arrowing into the bottom corner.
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51 min A few of you have asked why Hudson-Odoi’s goal was disallowed. Abraham was slightly offside in the build up, and I don’t know what else to say.
50 min Thiago makes an excellent tackle on Barkley, who looked set to run through on goal after a good pass from Abraham.
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49 min Emerson clips a good pass behind the Bayern defence to find Mount, who hits a low left-footed shot from a tight angle that is comfortably saved by Neuer. Mount had no support, which is why he took the shot on when the odds weren’t in his favour.
46 min Peep peep! Bayern begin the second half.
Half time: Bayern 2-1 Chelsea (agg: 5-1)
Peep peep! A brilliant Bayern are storming into the last eight, though Chelsea deserve credit for their puppy-dog enthusiasm. Even at 5-0 down on aggregate, and with a sunkissed beach awaiting, they attacked with purpose and intent. See you in 10 minutes for the second half.
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GOAL! Bayern 2-1 Chelsea (agg: 5-1; Abraham 44)
Tammy Abraham gets a first-half consolation goal Emerson’s driven cross was pushed out by Neuer straight to Abraham, who tapped it into the open net from six yards. Neuer should have done better there.
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43 min Emerson is booked for hoofing Goretzka.
40 min Perisic beats James with a stepover and slams a low cross to the near post, where Muller gets in front of Christensen but can’t control the ball or steer it behind his standing leg towards goal. He was trying one or the other.
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39 min Bayern are so good: their aggression, their movement, their one-touch passing, their everything.
37 min Here’s Adesegun Agbebiyi on the subject of Frank Lampard’s school report.
“Not sure James has done anything worthy of note in this Chelsea team other than the lucky goal against Ajax. He is not solid and pretty error prone. Not sure about Mount either. He just doesn’t boss games enough and his finishing is terrible. He would be half decent if he scored even 10% more of his chances. Mount reminds me of Lingard and there is every chance he goes off the boil like him.
“Should your short list not include Tammy Abraham – he’s the team’s highest goalscorer and most likely to succeed in the long run in my opinion. B is a bit harsh… I think his man management could use some work. B+ from me.”
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36 min Bayern’s route to glory is:
- Quarter-final: Barcelona or Napoli
- Semi-final: Manchester City or Lyon
- Final: PSG, Atalanta, Atletico Madrid or RB Leipzig.
It’s not easy, but there’s nothing for them to worry about, especially with Liverpool out of the competition. Bayern v Man City would be an immense semi-final; on recent evidence I’d fancy Bayern.
34 min We’ve just seen a replay of Hudson-Odoi’s disallowed goal. Abraham was slightly offside in the build up.
31 min A superb move from Bayern ends with the stretching Gnabry belting a volley across the face of goal from a tight angle. I think/assume he was going for goal, but it was a difficult chance as he was at full stretch.
NO GOAL! Bayern 2-0 Chelsea
VAR has seen an offside somewhere, so Hudson-Odoi’s goal has been disallowed. I bet VAR is good at parties.
That was a lovely goal from Hudson-Odoi. He received a short pass from Abraham, 25 yards from goal to the left of centre. His fast feet took him away from Thiago, and then he coaxed a beautiful curling shot into the far corner from 22 yards.
GOAL! Bayern 2-1 Chelsea (Hudson-Odoi 28)
Callum Hudson-Odoi bites the hand that wanted to feed him!
27 min “Oh well,” says Mary Waltz, “at least Chelsea ended all doubt early and I can switch over to Barca with no guilt.”
26 min Emerson almost gets one back for Chelsea. He charged purposefully past three players before hitting a shot from 18 yards that was pushed behind for a corner by Neuer. It was a comfortable enough save.
James took a throw-in to Kovacic, who dawdled and was shoved off the ball by Muller. The ball ran to Lewandowski and suddenly Bayern had four on two. Lewandowski considered the two off-the-ball runs to his left, decided not to use them and instead angled a sliderule pass to the unmarked Perisic on the other side of the area. He watched the ball onto his right foot and guided it past Cabaellro at the near post.
GOAL! Bayern 2-0 Chelsea (agg: 5-0; Perisic 24)
Ivan Perisic scores an offensively easy goal to make it 5-0 on aggregate.
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23 min It’s all Bayern. Every time Chelsea get the ball they are swamped by red shirts.
20 min “All eyes on Bayern and their match fitness after finishing their season a while ago,” says Ruth Purdue. “Could be the difference.”
Yes, I did wonder about that, but the intensity of their play in the first 20 minutes has pretty eye-catching. Their freshness suggests the month-long break might have been an advantage.
18 min Gnabry’s inswinging cross from the right beats everyone and almost drifts into the net at the far post.
17 min Goretzka’s acrobatic long-range volley goes over the bar. This could get really ugly for Chelsea. It’s not particularly pretty at the moment, tbf.
15 min “Interesting VAR situation with the penalty,” says John Barrow. “If Caballero hadn’t taken Lewandowski down, it probably wouldn’t have been a penalty - or a goal. The offside call would have stood and play resumed with a free kick. It’s one of the interesting issues with VAR: if you score a goal there are endless replays to see if there was an offside in the build-up. However, if an offside is called during an attack, there is no VAR check.”
With the caveat that I haven’t a clue about the laws of football any more, I’m not sure that’s quite right. Wouldn’t the assistant only have put the flag up when the attack stopped, i.e. after Lewandowski put the ball in the net? You see that quite a lot these days, players putting the ball in the net just to be sure, even if they were flagged offside four days earlier.
14 min Davies storms down the left and angles a crisp pass into Muller, on the edge of the D. He takes the ball in his stride and spanks a rising drive just over the bar. He was shoved by Kante in the act of shooting, which put him off balance.
13 min This has been a blistering start from Bayern. At this precise moment - 20:13 BST on 8 August 2020 - they are the best team in Europe.
11 min Gnabry’s long-range shot kicks up a little awkwardly at Caballero, who holds on safely.
11 min “Mea culpa, Rob - you did say interesting, not surprising,” says Neal Butler. “You’re not the only one whose cognitive function has pencils stuck up its nose and underpants on its head. I have to say, I do like the look of that Chelsea midfield. Kovacic has been a minor revelation this year - under Sarri, he looked very poor, IMHO.”
Yes he’s been terrific, probably their best player this season. If Kante can stay for next season it would make an enormous difference to this team.
GOAL! Bayern Munich 1-0 Chelsea (agg: 4-0; Lewandowski 10 pen)
Robert Lewandowski scores his 52nd goal of the season! Caballero went the right way, to his left, but the penalty was right in the corner. Brilliant finish.
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Gnabry slipped a lovely pass through to Lewandowski, who got to the ball a split-second before Caballero and was taken out. Replays showed the left-back Emerson was playing him onside.
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PENALTY GIVEN! And Caballero is booked.
7 min Lewandowski is taken down by Caballero, and the referee is about to give a penalty when he realises the flag has gone up for offside. This may be overturned by VAR.
5 min Bayern look pretty sharp, certainly for a team who haven’t played for a month. The mighty left-back Alphonso Davies curls an excellent ball from the left that flashes across the face of goal.
2 min “Not sure that Hudson-Odoi being on the team-sheet is that big a surprise - with Pedro, Willian, and Pulisic all out, they don’t really have anyone else to put on the wing,” says Neal Butler. “Abraham starting is a little surprising, given Giroud’s recent form, but not Hudson-Odoi.”
I thought I said ‘interesting’ rather than ‘surprising’, but my cognitive function isn’t what it wibble.
1 min Peep peep! Chelsea, in blue, kick off from left to right. Bayern are in red. As per Peter Oh’s email during the City game last night, this match is a mobile provider-off: T-Mobile versus Three. Hang on, Chelsea are sponsored by Three.
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The players line up for the familiar Champions League anthem. No handshakes tonight.
“Evening Rob,” says Stephen Carr. “We may as well talk about Pirlo because this game already has a fork stuck in it. Its an interesting appointment given Pochettino’s availability and Pep only having a year left on his deal. Can’t see them bombing Pirlo out after a year unless he completely screws it up.”
I suppose there is a reasonable precedent for a superpower giving a legendary regista his first big managerial job, but it’s such a big risk. I’d love to know what he did during his seven days in charge of the under-23s to gain such a quick promotion.
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The most interesting bit of team news is the inclusion of Tammy Abraham and Callum Hudson-Odoi, who have drifted to the margins. Hudson-Odoi has had a seriously frustrating season, though he’s still only 19 so he’s not ready to join the list of football’s lost boys just yet.
Interesting... very interesting
OFFICIAL ✍️ | Andrea Pirlo is the new coach of the First Team.https://t.co/riVxl1enbJ#CoachPirlo pic.twitter.com/pf9QRbJ6Ll
— JuventusFC (#Stron9er 🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆) (@juventusfcen) August 8, 2020
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A reminder of the first leg of this tie, which took place in more innocent times.
Bayern (yes, yes, or Chelsea) will play Barcelona or Napoli in the quarter-final on Friday. Our Baz is covering the second leg at the Camp Nou.
Pre-match business
For Chelsea, this is the final game of a promising first season under Frank Lampard. They had a brilliant run to the FA Cup final, beating Liverpool, Leicester and Manchester United, and qualified for the Champions League. Christian Pulisic was a revelation and Timo Werner and Hakim Ziyech are eye-catching signings.
But the plan to invest in young English players didn’t really pay off, with the exception of Mason Mount and to a lesser extent Reece James, and the defence needs a lot of work. I’d give Frank a B on his school report. I’m sure he could really give one.
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Team news
Bayern Munich (4-2-3-1) Neuer; Kimmich, Boateng, Alaba, Davies; Goretzka, Thiago; Gnabry, Muller, Perisic; Lewandowski.
Substitutes: Ulreich, Hoffmann, Odriozola, Sule, Javi Martinez, Coutinho, Cuisance, Hernandez, Tolisso, Tillman, Musiala, Arrey-Mbi.
Chelsea (4-3-3) Caballero; James, Christensen, Zouma, Emerson; Barkley, Kante, Kovacic; Hudson-Odoi, Abraham, Mount.
Substitutes: Arrizabalaga, Cumming, Rudiger, Giroud, Batshuayi, Tomori, Broja, Lawrence, Maatsen, Bate, Simeu.
Referee Ovidiu Hategan (Romania)
Premable
Hello. It’s Saturday night at the Allianz Arena, and Chelsea are in town. The last time that happened was on 19 May 2012, the greatest night in Chelsea’s history. Eight years later they need the greatest comeback in anyone’s history. Let’s be clear: while there have been bigger comebacks in European football, there is no precedent for a team of Bayern’s ability and experience blowing a 3-0 lead from the away leg.
The closest is probably Barcelona’s hilarious collapse against Metz in 1984-85, but this Bayern team are on a different level. Chelsea have two chances of making the quarter-finals, and slim is self-isolating.
The last match Bayern played was the German cup final on 4 July, so this is a warm-up for their quarter-final against Barcelona or Napoli on Friday. They were playing a different sport when they won 3-0 at Stamford Bridge in February, and their form under Hansi Flick has been astonishing.
Bayern have won 25 of their last 26 games in all competitions, the only blemish a 0-0 draw at home to Leipzig. If Chelsea get through tonight, nothing will ever make sense again.
Kick off 8pm.
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